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The Masked Author - Week One
Stats:
Published:
2021-07-09
Words:
500
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
6
Kudos:
52
Bookmarks:
3
Hits:
761

A Tight Fit

Summary:

“I’ve done the research, know what I’m comfortable with, alright?”
“Alright. You’re-”
“Dani, I swear if you ask me one more time if I’m sure…”

Notes:

Masked Author Week 1 Challenge: All Dialogue/No Dialogue (500 word limit)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

“Yeah.”

“Sure you’re ready? Or sure as in…”

“Sure I’m sure.”

“Sure you’re-”

“Sure I’m ready.”

“Yeah?”

“I’ve done the research, know what I’m comfortable with, alright?”

“Alright. You’re-”

“Dani, I swear if you ask me one more time if I’m sure…”

“Well, it’s a big deal and I just want you to be 100% sure! Once we do this, there’s no going back.”

“Dani-”

“It’s going to be a tight fit, that’s all I’m saying.”

“What do you think the lube is for?”

“I dunno, usually things flow pretty smoothly without it. It doesn’t seem...excessive?”

“Well - hang on, my foot’s stuck - sometimes the old tricks don’t always do it anymore and y’need to try something new.”

“Are you sure.”

“Oh my god, Dani.”

“It’s not too late. We can still stop.”

“Can’t stop if nothing’s even got going enough to technically be considered started yet!”

“Don’t get huffy with me! It’s going to be messy once we start.”

“What, exactly, do you imagine is going to happen? It’s not the bloomin’ Titanic, here.”

“.....”

“Dani? Dani.”

“Hm?”

“You were thinkin’ about Kate Winslet, weren’t you.”

No. No! I was-”

“You were! Look at you, all blushin’.”

“Yeah-- Well, who’s the one who saw it four times in theatres, hmm?”

“You came with me three times!”

“Still leaves one, Jamie.”

“I seem to recall a certain someone seeing Steel Magnolias so many times they went out and bought us a VCR just so we could watch it at home.”

“It’s a modern classic!”

“Ha! Now look who’s getting all huffy.”

“You don’t have to sound so pleased with yourself, y’know.”

“I am pleased with m’self.”

“Oh yeah, that so?”

“Yeah. That’s so. Alright, I’ve got my finger in the right spot.”

“How do you know it’s the right one?”

“Reckon it must be, since it’s already soaking wet.”

Someone’s smug.”

“Told you I knew what I was doing. Hand me the thing, will ya?”

“It’s...heavier than I thought.”

“Quite the tool, innit?”

“Really? What are you, five?”

“You love it. If I can just get my hand over here and twist --Ow!”

“Are you okay??”

“Yeah, just can’t quite twist that way, turns out.”

“You’re not hurt?”

“Might feel it a bit in the morning, I reckon, but nothing a little ice won’t fix.”

“Be careful. All that grunting is making me nervous.”

“Hang on, nearly there. Just a little deeper, aaaand-”

“Ack! Turn it off, turn it off!”

“I’m trying, I’m trying!”

“It’s getting everywhere!”

“I know, I know! There. It’s off.”

“Jamie.”

“Don’t. Don’t say it.”

“We should-

“I kept an old English manor running for years with plumbin’ worse than this, I should be able to fix a bloody busted pipe.”

“I dunno what to tell you, Jamie, but the pipe seems to disagree.”

“Don’t suppose we could just not use the kitchen sink for the foreseeable future?”

“I’m calling a plumber, Jamie.”

“.....Not a word to Owen.”

Notes:

 

 

 
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