Archive of Our Own ^beta

Silk flowers are distinguishable by its color, crimson red with pale pink. Just like her eye, burning in red with glowing pink plum blossoms. An existence whose liveliness disrupted his peace. A mere mortal but broke his walls. A troublesome girl who calls him to do her trivial things.

She was the fire and he was the wind, her flames spread no matter how strong his wind is. It is too late to break the connection now. He picks the silk flowers outside the Wangshu Inn without thinking. It reminds him of one of the trivial things she asks, he wouldn’t say it but he come to like picking flowers with her. There was one time she asked if he could go pick the silk flowers with her in the Liyue harbor but he was not able to give his answer because she beats him to it, “It’s just a prank! I know you don’t want to go there because there are many people.” Masking her sadness with laugh.

He wasn’t able to give his answer.

And right now, he picked all the silk flowers and even the sweet flowers within the area. Using his wind to drop the sunsettia down from the tree, they always eat sunsettia on the way when picking herbs. His peaceful days were mixed with her jokes and lively laugh, not having her around for a long time feels different. Days like this are always tedious for him. He lived for thousand years already, she wasn’t announcing her presence only for just a month but he feels another thousand of years were added to his life span.

He spent his days like the way he used to before she came into his life. Guarding liyue from dangers, looking for evil spirits, fighting monster that are imbused with evil sprits, eating lunch alone at Wangshu Inn and then going back to guard his archon’s beloved city, the cyle repeats. Protecting Liyue was his duty, he didn’t rest and it was an unending battle.

He rarely sleeps.

Sometimes he passes out from an exhausting battle but it was for only a short of time like a blink of a mortal eyes and in some days he dozes off too but he never had a good time sleep. He always keeps his eyes open and immortals like him did not need sleep.

Sleep is unnecessary for immortals but a necessity for mortals.

Such flowers in his hands reminds him of her eyes, her liveliness, her brazenness. Who goes to Wuwang hill at night? He still remember those words. A rendezvous at the middle of the night in the Wuwang hill, at first maybe it was a coincidence but it was fate.  And yes he did, he went to Wuwang hill for the past days just to see a glimpse of her but there wasn’t any traces of her.

He longs for her.

He wonders if she is doing well. Hu tao is very a troublesome girl, she always gets hurt when fighting but she can heal herself a only just little after the fight and he wonders if someone did tend her wounds. How was her poetry? Hu tao said she will be back with a surprise of her work, but she didn’t.

Xiao thought of visiting her, maybe a surprise visit. Human emotions- no, mortals are hard to understand for an immortal like him. He doesn’t understand why humans likes surprises, or even like to be surprised.

But the moment he visited the funeral parlor, if that is surprise then he doesn’t want to be surprised at all. He came to surprise her but he was the one surprised.  The moment he knocked on the doors of the parlor, he was greeted with gloom. It was suspicious because it wasn’t the ferrylady who welcomed her inside. And his beloved archon looks hesitant to let him in, he has so many questions to ask on what happened but Zhongli said that they will discuss it later.

She is lying down on the bed the white sheets made her auburn hair distinctive.

The plum blossoms in her eyes didn’t glow anymore.

“When did you last sleep Tao?” his golden eyes couldn’t help but show worry and his voice filled with gentleness.

“Ehe! Just few days ago but I’m fine now that you are here!” her voice still as lively as ever, but he knows her just as she knows him. He sighed then climbed the bed and sit beside her. The brunette closed her eyes as he caress her hair, they basked in silence but it is comforting. The adeptus hopes that it will make her feel at ease. Because every time he fell after a battle ends, she gently caress his head making him easily to fall asleep.

“Xiaoxiao, can you play me a song?” she asked eyes still closed then turned her head on his lap. The moon watched them as he plays a song with his flute and the music lulls her to sleep.

At that moment, the immortal realized how important sleep was to her.

“She even forgot her hat yesterday.”

Zhongli sighed as he tells Xiao what happened, a look in his eyes that Xiao knows too.  It’s the first time that the funeral director forgot the most important thing to her, she never goes out without it-- she dearly holds the hat given by the only family she had that already crossed the border, her grandpa. Xiao may be an immortal but he knows that at some point what she felt, they shared the same sentiment when they were both alone, when their loved ones disappeared.

It wasn’t easy for a mortal, it wasn’t also easy for immortals.

And discussing about the brunette’s welfare isn’t easy like a cake. Zhongli is the one Hu Tao trusted the most, a father figure that she didn’t have. An immortal taking care of a mortal that was forsaken by her own kin. The only heir of the Hu family rarely gets sick and Zhongli always take care of her. Seeing Hu Tao passed out with his own eyes and her sickly pale skin like this makes the ex-archon anxious, who knew he could feel like this. The archon may be knowledgeable in everything but it is best to leave the matters to a mortal who is experienced in the medicine field.

After many years have passed, the ex-archon and the adeptus have a chat for the first time but quite unfortunate in this circumstance.

Hu Tao is a very competitive business woman, always thinking of a strategy to make her business grow. Despite being a director at such a young age, she also likes to read and wander at night to get ideas on her poetry. At morning till night the director works then before the sun rises again she take long walks in hopes of getting inspiration. She got a rest when Xiao lulls her to sleep. It felt a little better, she just hopes so. As the Wangsheng director she have duties to attend to.

The Wangsheng and the Yakshas before were both like soldiers and doctors, purging negative karma and containing the plague which is a result of the negative karma by purifying the air and burning corpses.   

She embraces death, He fights death.

Dealing with death ever since, and speaking of death, she was on the way back to the parlor from visiting a client at Qingce Village. One may fear and avoids any thing that relates to death, but Hu Tao is not scared. The descendant of the Wangsheng and Conqueror of demons deal with death every day, but it is not just death because there is pain and all.

Hu Tao may be a laissez faire owner but she was too swamp with her work and not doing it will be an overdue, getting behind her work was the last thing she want. She haven’t seen Xiao again after he visited though they kept in touch with letters, she missed many nights of their rendezvous. It was his first time to visit the funeral in the harbor, yet what he saw was Hu Tao in her most vulnerable state.

The moon has risen together with the darkness and it looks majestic but she didn’t mind, in fact she like walking with this kind of atmosphere but something feels ominous. The drops of the rains fell as it becomes heavier in just a second and soaking her hair down to her clothes.

‘Ah. it’s raining.’

The gloomy sky and the droplets of rain was the last thing she saw as the darkness blackened out her vision.

“Hu Tao is a mortal- and if she is really diagnosed with such rare kind of sickness, I’m afraid but there is nothing we can do about it.”

There is nothing we can do about it. Those words keep repeating in his head, it echoes in his ear and leaves a bitter feeling in his mouth. They are powerful immortals, how come there is nothing they can do about it? But it was Zhongli who told him this, a powerful being for thousand of years. The news of Hu Tao passing out again and hospitalized shaken him. Blood stained his clothes as he defeat the last hilichurl with his primordial blade. He feels more exhausting than before, he immediately went back to Wangshu Inn to take a rest because she always nags him, and yet she was the restless one between the two of them.

He couldn’t sleep.

The yaksha was used to sleepless days and nights, tonight is not an exception. Exhaustion deep into his bones, eye lids that feels so heavy and topaz eyes that are blurry watching the full moon in the sky but sleep doesn’t take over him. Afraid of what tomorrow will come, fear clouds his mind of what will be the result of her condition. 

He wants to stay by her side all day and all night but a part of him feels torn of guarding Liyue, he wants to be there when she wakes up. “Alatus, do not worry about me. I will be okay it is just really boring doing nothing, but just remember that you are no longer in war anymore.” He could hear the gentleness of her voice on the letter she wrote before she passed out again, it at least put his mind at east even a little.  ‘She will be okay’ his mind speaks while his hand grasping on the white blanket sheets, clinging to the little hope that death is not knocking on her door.

But the wind knew better, the sun has risen again.

As an immortal and the ex-archon of Liyue, Zhongli have seen many deaths-- mortals or not, saw many comrades fall, and he could still remember the day she saw her disappear into dust. Despite being an immortal, they may live thousands of centuries longer than mortals but there will come a time that death awaits them. The difference of being an immortal but can also be seen a curse is that they don’t easily fall, they don’t die of sickness like how mortals do.  

“I’m sorry Mr. Zhongli, We did our best and as of now there are only few information on Fatal Familial Insomnia and there was no cure found.”

“I see. Thank you Doctor Baizhu.” Then doctor gave him a paper with Hu Tao’s name and details about her condition before the doctor closed the doors of the room.

Zhongli checks up on her if she is awake but her eyes are still closed looking peacefully yet her complexion is pale.  He didn’t want to wake her up when she is asleep, she was restless for the past days. It was a relief that someone have taken her to Wangsheng  immediately when she passed out on the road, he didn’t have the chance to know their name for they left immediately but it seems they aren’t from Liyue because their clothes looks came from nation of Inazuma.

The plum blossom in her eyes didn’t bloom brightly like it used to be before.

“I’m glad you’re awake Tao. How are you feeling?” No matter how bright the light is in the room and the sun light outside the window, it only made her eyes squint. As she opens her carefully, the ceiling and walls were different then an excessive amount of tiredness hits her. Her eyes look at the side and found Zhongli holding a cup of water for her.

“Exhausted to the brink of my bones.” She said after sitting up and drinking the cup of water that relieved her throat.

She was looking around the room and shifted his gaze to him, the mood has changed drastically when she said his name in a whispers voice, “Mr. Zhongli…..”

“Do you see anything different in this room?”

“Anything different?”

“Hehe Nevermind that. So how long I was out? And I also know you have important things to say to me, I also too.”

To be honest, Zhongli was puzzled by her question. Was there anything different in the room? Or she was asking a general question? He can’t tell and he wasn’t used to tell a mortal, not just a mortal but a mortal he came to look after- that they will be dying soon. He was knowledgeable in everything but it was difficult to tell someone who is important to him that they will be gone like a memory too, he was used to.  

Zhongli found his arms embracing the little girl tightly, “Tao, I’m- I’m very sorry.”

His voice was broken, she hugged him back tightly too like a child desperately clinging to their parent when they are afraid of a thunder. The funeral director already knows it, that death is knocking on her door. But hearing it from Zhongli and reading her diagnosis later is a different thing.

“Mr. Zhongli, I just…..I just want to ask one favor. Will you prepare my funeral when I’m gone?”

The seeds sprout to life when it is springs, everything seems so warm. Xiao passed through many springs and this year’s spring wasn’t warm as it seems. But he does not care because all what matters is she’s still warm and breathing, her existence is his spring.

He rushed to her like a speed of light, holding her tightly and not letting go of her as if she is turning into butterflies anytime.

They stayed in silence and he wished that the time will stop even for a moment, then the silence were broken when she spoke “Xiao, I might still have a less than a year or few more years you know, you can save your tears on that time hehe.” He didn’t know that tears were shedding in his eyes unable to hold it back. How can she just joke at a time like this?

As if she was reading his mind, he heard her gentle voice saying “Thank you for crying in my stead.” While in her mind, she never saw and heard that the vigilant yaksha cried but she knows at some minutes in his thousand years, he cried. It was the first time she saw him like this, her fingers gently wiping the remaining tears in his face as  topaz and ruby eyes meet.

Xiao have encountered mortals that are afraid of dying, and some are even trying to pursue the eternal life, but it this is Hu Tao. The little brave girl who went to the boundary of life and death to search for his beloved grandfather, a diligent lady who become a director of a funeral at such a young age, a director who do her best to fulfill the wishes of her clients- the living and the dead, the one who told him that death is constant for all beings beneath the heaven. He knows that dying is not what she is afraid of, “Hu Tao I will always be by your side, I am your companion  and- “ he says as he put the strands of her hair beneath her ears.

“You are the silliest mortal I have ever met.”

“And you are the most warmhearted adeptus I have ever met.”

They spend the night engaging in a hushed conversation while sitting on the bed as she leans on his shoulder, gazing at the stars through the window.

Even if it is raining, the funeral director still springs to life despite her days numbered. She still handles the parlor because she still capable and wanted to. Though she now only very important tasks because Zhongli took all the heavy tasks and delegated it, he also refrained her from going too far. It was the time of spring and also the time of Windblume festival in Mondstadt, she wish she could go there too. Lost in thought, thinking if she could go there with Xiao. A chance to go to a festival that they could both enjoy, because it is unwelcome for people who deals with death to go the Lantern festival at the harbor.

The warm glow of the afternoon makes her want to stroll and end being cooped in her home even just today. There are times that random thoughts visits her mind, the people she tries to befriend with- do they even miss her? Of course they don’t, such thoughts were quickly dismissed by her.  She joked, “Maybe the pranks I made are now biting me back.”

An alone mortal who never had friends, an alone immortal who were left behind by his friends. Looking at opposites, maybe they are quietly similar in some ways too. Standing up from the chair then turning off the lights of the room before she closes the door and leaves the funeral parlor. The touch of sunlight wasn’t that strong because it was already parting with orange and yellow hues. 

And in those colors she saw a contrasting blue, his hair were like blue in winter. Chongyun stands up from the cold chair he was sitting on outside the funeral parlor. She utters his name with smile and voice trying to be lively as she walks toward him.

“Yo Cloud-“ she wasn’t able to finish her sentence because a pair of arms embracing her tightly, his blue pale hair on her shoulders.

“You cheeky hexagram hat! We were so worried!” she never saw Chongyun this affectionate except when he ate a juyeon chili. The brunette was stuck on her place like a statue, her lips a little bit hanging from surprise, the lingering doubt in her mind seems to be clear.

“I’m so glad I didn’t immediately go home, I thought I’ll never see you again.” His whisper was filled with seriousness as aquamarine eyes gazed at her then he asked, “How are you feeling now? I’m sorry.”

“Chongyun did you eat another spicy dish before coming here?!”

“What?! I didn’t I promise! I immediately came here after my exorcism!”

“So you were waiting here for how long?! To see me ?! Oh You really miss me that much huh!”

“Yeah I do.” They were back to their small banter like they always used but shocked was an understatement because he was never honest like this, and as he continues to explain she could feel her heart beating rapidly, ”And I want to apologize, I’m really sorry Tao I wasn’t there.  I’m sorry we weren’t there. We tried to visit you at the hospital but Baizhu said that the guardian can only enter inside, you never woke up. Then we visit again but you already came home with Mr. Zhongli.”

“And when we visit at the parlor many times, they said you were resting and busy. I-I was so worried that something really happened because we never saw you again since you were hospitalized.  We made some get well soon gifts for you and this is Xiangling’s letter since she is in an expedition with beidou while this one is Xingqiu’s  and he is in Inazuma right now.” He was handing the letters and the gift bag and asked “But seriously how are you feeling right now?”

“I– I’m sorry too.” she wanted to say more, the pang in her chest aches. “ I’m really okay! It was only overfatigue hehe”

Lies.

‘ I’m really sorry.’

The city of freedom held it’s Windblume festival, flowers and decorations where everywhere and it seems very delightful from the carpet on the entrance to the fountain, as if love blooms in the air. Even though the plum blossoms in Hu Tao’s eyes weren’t glowing brightly as before, her smile were warm and beaming. Her happiness matters and Xiao will do anything that will make her happy, even if it is getting an earful talk from Zhongli.

The consultant of the parlor and the adeptus were in the main hall having a chat and drinking tea, the latter asking permission to the former if he could bring the director to the Windblume Festival. As Zhongli sips his tea, Xiao was stunned for a second because of the former’s question.

 “You have a feelings for her, don’t you?”

“It’s not what you think. She said she wanted to go to a festival, I know she never once experienced Lantern festival here and celebrating Windblume will make her happy. If she wants to go Mondstadt, I will take her there.” Xiao reasoned as he shifted his gaze to the left.

“I’ve heard you were learning to cook?”

“Where did you even heard that. I just wanted to see why mortals fascinates cooking.”

“Hm. Tubby said the silk flowers in your garden were really pretty.”

“What?! I– I just planted it there so she won’t hoard the silk flowers in the inn.”

“Ah, then I shall approve the two of you going to Windblume festival. Please take care of her well.”

“And Xiao– I just want to remind you that I am not longer an archon anymore. Also, you have seen that Liyue is changing too. I hope you won’t do something you will regret.”

Time really flies so fast when you are enjoying so much. It was the last day of the festival and they made a good choice on picking the day because there were fewer people. The moon was in it’s full glory glowing in the sky along the sea of stars. The two of them were currently sitting on the smooth stone bench near the bushes across the archon statue watching the full moon.

“Aiya! Xiao you’ll get cold too!” he put his coat on her shoulders, he is thankful that they are not wearing their usual clothes. Hu Tao’s hair were tied in a high ponytail and the two of them seems like wearing a matching Mondstadt  clothes, the dress really fits her and she looks like a princess. Venti did a good job preparing their clothes and styling her. Though Xiao was just about to kill Venti when he said that Hu Tao took Xiao’s breath away, thank celestia she didn’t hear it. The adeptus was nearly going to teleport far away from the anemo archon because he did not stop, Venti told them that they look like a couple on a date. Xiao granted the anemo archon a mercy because it was worth it to see the embarrassed face of his princess.

“Your health matters more than mine, and do not worry I’m not cold. ”

“Did you enjoy today Xiao?” she asked as she leaned on his shoulders.

He really did enjoy today even though the festival feels short, “I did because I’m with you.”

“Then I’m glad hehe. Thank you for coming here with me Xiao.”

Xiao likes to write sometimes, and Hu Tao gave him a notebook on his birthday. Ever since he got the notebook, he started writing or maybe it is even called a diary in mortal terms. He will definitely write what happened today, it was the first time he celebrated a festival with happiness, and it was more meaningful because he spent his day with her.

They ate local food, played mini games because she insisted though only few ones because he doesn’t want her to be exhausted, they even studied poetry and she was most delighted about it, he played her a song using a lyre and taught her some basics how to play it too. She played him a song though even it was mostly off tune, but for him it was beautiful that he couldn’t take his eyes off her and listen carefully to every note she played. 

The wind was getting colder and it would be bad for her health if they stayed more, it was time to go home so he called her name but she isn’t responding so she probably fell asleep.

“Hu Tao, the moon really looks beautiful tonight isn’t it?” he gently holds her waist and scoop her legs up, carrying her like a princess then in just a swirl of wind they arrived are at her room. Before he left her abode, the silk flowers he tend to in his garden were made into a bouquet and he put it on the table beside her bed. Upon arriving in his inn, he found a tiny paper with fancy writing was in his pocket.

Months have passed again like the things they never said and just like that the spring ended. Xiao never failed to miss a night to visit Hu Tao and it became a routine. He still fights from day to dawn but his fights were never in vain because the real battle was with his self.

He looks for answers, so he found his self in the Wangshu Inn reading a book about insomnia. But there were still no new information about it and there were still no cure in mortal’s point of view. He already asked moon caver and cloud retainer, there might be a way to cure it but it is not guaranteed because there is an equivalent exchange for every wish.

‘Is there really nothing that I can do?’ he thought. Maybe Zhongli were really right, because even for an immortal adepti with a karma like him were not possible to be cured but he can’t just give up right now.  Some things in his lists were crossed out already, but there are still things were left and one of it is to ask the hydro archon but his teleportation skill were limited. There might still be a way and he will do everything for her even if it is giving his adepti blood.

It is selfish for him to do that, can’t he be selfish for once? Just once? But he knew that Hu Tao wouldn’t want that, she won’t be happy with it. Because he knows that what she wanted for him was to smile, she wanted him to laugh, she wanted him to rest after another day of hard work, she wanted him to take care of his health and eat many foods as many as he wants. She wanted him to live and choose for his self.

The yaksha closed his eyes and sighed. Even if his adepti blood would able to cure her, it will be still dangerous and he doesn’t want to put her in danger. It already happened once, and the kid lost her memories.

Now his thoughts were going astray and thinking of “ifs.” Her disease were in the brain and according to the other adepti, it can be cured but her memories might be gone because there will always something to lose when it is an equivalent exchange. She would live longer if she agrees, but her memories will be wiped out and Xiao couldn’t help but feel a torn in his heart because he will be forgotten too. But if she wants it, he won’t blink an eye to do it.

Xiao have lived for thousand years and those days were monotonous but he never thought that there will come a time that the sun rises too fast, so he wrote a letter to her that he will be gone for a while but he will come back.

The warmth of summer makes it harder for the funeral director to sleep. Her lack of sleep were more evident now, and the feeling of weariness weighs her more now. It was harder for her to stay asleep and there are days that she can feel her muscles stiffens.

The director was in her office room doing the paper works when she heard a knock on her doon, “Come in.”

“Ms. Hu, the collector of the finance report from the Qixing is here and they are here to collect it.” The ferrylady said with a worried expression on her face because of the director’s panicked face.

“Aiya! So that’s what I forgot! Thank you for telling me. Please tell them that I will just hand it by myself later.”

“Yes Ms. Hu, but is there anything I can help with? You’re not supposed to be working today though.”

“No no no! You’ve done great and you are always a hardworking employee. I will just call you if I need help.”

“Thank you, Ms. Hu. I’ll go tell them now and I’ll be back to bring you tea.” The ferrylady closed the door and Hu Tao started working on the report. Only selected people in the Wangsheng knows Hu Tao’s condition, and she haven’t even told her friends yet. They always send letters but these days she still haven’t replied to them because she doesn’t have the energy to do so. Telling them that she will die soon was hard to do so, Xiangling will probably burst into tears.

It was hard to bring up in the letter and honestly she wants to tell them in person. Thanks to that day were Chongyun waited for her, she realized that they were really friends all along. She also still haven’t found the person who saved her when she passed out, she wants to thank them personally. Ferrylady brought her tea and snacks after a while but doing the finance report made her hungry.

After handing in the finance report, she went to the Wanmin Restaurant. Xingqiu was still in Inazuma and she didn’t know Chongyun’s whereabouts.

“Hello Uncle! Long time no see hehe~ One serving of my favorite please!”

“It’s nice to see you again Hu Tao! Coming right up!”

Hu Tao was looking inside the Wanmin searching for a navy blue haired girl when Chef Mao said, “Oh no my apologies. If you are looking of Xiangling she went to Mondstadt this morning, there was an urgent matter and she was immediately brought by Lumine.”

“It’s alright Uncle! I’ll just visit next time. Ah the abalone really smells so delicious!” After getting her food and exchanging thank you, she went to sit on one of the chairs. She will just come again to tell them personally that she was some important things to say, ironic to tell her that she is dying while in a funeral.  It’s been so long when she tasted this dish, she wonders if Xiao is eating well. He just left a letter that he will be heading to somewhere and didn’t left a clue where, though Hu Tao had an inkling feeling where he went.

She misses him and hopes he will come back safely.

It was another night of having a staring contest with the ceiling, the room making the petite girl feel small and the deafening silence makes her miss the yaksha, him and his voice lulling her to sleep. She couldn’t help but think of him, the yaksha is certainly strong but she couldn’t help but feel worried all the time. He was heading to a place where she doesn’t know, no news of him for the past weeks.

She turned her side on the bed facing the door, then closed her eyes as the thoughts tries to claw her deep. It has already been decided by her that she will live her days without regret, because there were no cure and all she wanted was to spend time with him.

As she tries to sleep there is a knock on her door. Her feet steps down from the bed and touched the floor, walking to door she wonders who could it be at this hour. Her hand turned the door knob and felt the coldness of the metal.

But the sight greeted her with warm and his topaz eyes were bright. “Walnut! I–“

“Xiao! Hey are you okay? Come in first! Why is an adeptus out of breath!” she pulled him inside and wiped the sweat on his forehead then she asked why he didn’t just knock on the window or balcony.

“Wait what happened to your clothes?! So you travelled to another nation without me huh but at least you used the door today.” She pouted and he found it cute, he also took this chance to hold her wrist while she wipes his face.

Xiao put the hair ornament on her palm, ”Forgive me. I thought of you when I found this, mortals do commemorate birth so I hope I’m not late. Happy birthday Walnut, may I put this on your hair?”

“S–sure. A-aiya! I even forgot what day today is!” his face was so close to hers and she could even smell the lingering scent of ocean in him, making her face flushed red the same color with the hair ornament. She couldn’t help but look at him too because he was wearing different clothes, a black overcoat with gold linings that matches his eyes, white shirt that were covered with a black waistcoat and matched with black pants, the eye catching turquoise jewel brooch on the middle of a cravat, and of course his hair was styled and parted in the left side.

Xiao handed her a mirror feeling proud, the hair ornament was hard to find because the red jewel stones were cut into butterfly shape but it was worth it. Thanks to the hydro user mage even though her companion makes his blood pressure, the fool fatui harbinger who doesn’t believe in his stars but looks at the mage as if she was his star, but he guess even the fatui’s took vacations and spend it with their lovers.

“Thank you Xiao!” she smiled with her eyes closed though the spring has ended but the flowers are blooming with her smile, Xiao captured it with the Kamera he bought.

“I also bought crystalcores too aside from the butterfly ones.” He took out all the things he bought for her from his inventory, she was still in awe of the Kamera and picture so she pulled him on her side to take lots of pictures together.

“Do you have a wish Walnut?”

“If there’s still time, I wanted to go to Dragonspine with you someday.”

The leaves have started to fall in Liyue and oranges leaves were blown by the wind. Just like the thread of her life little by little detaching, her symptoms getting worst as the season ends. If she can pass through the boundary of life and death, she was stuck in the boundary of sleep and wakefulness.

There on the balcony, the sky painted with orange hues and the maple leaves were dancing as the mortal and immoral watch it. Ever since the day he went to another nation, she was just waiting for him to tell her why.

“There are many butterflies today.” she says as her eyes looks at the space.

Confusion was painted in his face, there were no butterflies at the vicinity of the balcony but only the maple leaves. And it sunk to him, the forgetfulness and hallucinations. She was seeing butterflies instead of the leaves, even if it hurts to utter words he tried.

“Indeed, they are really pretty.”

She is feeling tired, he was used to feeling tired. Immortal or mortal, they both accepted the feeling of tiredness.

“Alatus, tell me the truth.”

“Why you’re not answering me?!”

“Xiao, tell me.”

“Please.”

“Even if I have an incurable disease, I never thought of forgetting you. I- I can’t bear living on without a single memory of you in exchange for making my life longer. Your life is precious Xiao.”

They were still on the floor, her hands were gripping his shirt as she cries on his chest while he holds her by wrapping around his arms to her. Hearing those words made the tears fall, mixed emotions he was feeling. A mortal who who values his existence and hearing it making him feel things. But at the same time, he didn’t like it- being the cause of her tears and the agonizing thorn in his chest.

What happened was he told her that there is a cure though in an unconventional way. Hu Tao doubted it because in a mortal’s point of view, there were no cure and for an archon to help, there is an exchange. She was perceptive and the Hu blood flows in her so the latter found out that there are other things he is leaving out, that he could die along the way of transferring his adepti blood. The hydro archon’s method was complex, their existence was polar opposites. Her existence purifies, while his soul were already tainted with negative karma and if the two crossed, he will disappear along with the karma.

He may found the death he was waiting for, she will live and will no longer suffer from the pain she is feeling, a fair trade.  He doesn’t mind dying at her hands but it didn’t feel right. After all, he will just be a wind who just passed by not leaving any trace and never existed in her life. The immortal and the mortal had arguments but this was the first time she was crying so hard, he was crying too.

“Spending time with you was already enough for me, Xiao.” Despite the hiccups, her voice were still filled with tenderness.

It was painful but it was also a relief, that he will not be forgotten. He hugged her tightly whispering “I’m really sorry. I’m sorry I was being selfish. Please forgive me Tao. I don’t want to forget you too.”

It didn’t matter if they are immortal or mortal because both of them were in a pitiful circumstance. On the floor of the dim light room, they stayed on the floor waiting for their tears to dried up. 

The cycle of sleep never occurred to her anymore, she could only barely sleep and that was because of the medicine given by Zhongli.  The funeral matters were also handled by Zhongli now and she was grateful to him. Her voice became weaker by now too. The time clocks and the funeral director could feel the death approaching her.

The days were really boring so she started knitting too but it wasn’t enough. It was tiring to do nothing, it was also tiring to do something. She sighed, wondered if Xiao will be visiting tonight again, “Xiao” she unconsciously whispers his name on a whim then a whirl of green light suddenly emitted in front of her.

“You’re here?!?!” She was surprised and astonished that she sat up from her bed when she saw him. The adeptus made a small smile seeing her reaction, “Of course you silly walnut, you called for me.”

“Well now that you are here, Xiao I’m bored! Let’s teleport to somewhere!”

“Where do you want to go Tao?”

“Hmm Can we go to Inazuma?”

“I told you, No.”

“So cold! But anywhere is fine to be honest as long as you are comfortable andas long as I’m with you the Guardian Yaksha hehe Let’s take a walk together!”

The adeptus was standing on her side then his hand reaching hers, opening her palm and put a golden wood thing with a red knot on her palm, after a second they were in a different realm. It was a dimension Hu Tao have never seen.

“Why didn’t you tell me you have a mansion?!” she was amazed by everything, looking at the surrounding as they walk towards the gate of mansion, the blue ocean surrounding them.

They were walking side by side and he leaned a little closer to her, “You didn’t ask.”

“Of course I didn’t know silly! Do you live alone here?”

“I rarely use this place since I always reside at Wangshu Inn but a certain mortal always bother me there.”

“Hehe then why don’t you live here ? since I wont be able to follow you?”

“I don’t want to go somewhere where I know I won’t be able to- Nevermind. It’s just that this place……feels too- “ 

He continued as he inhales “Big” ‘lonely’

“Well you’re just small Xiao, I like this place and- oh! There are so many silk flowers here too and Aiyaaa! Archons there is a garden maze and is that a gazebo?!” she tried to run when they reach the gate then she entered the maze. How could she like a place like this, when it is far from her home.

“Hu Tao! Don’t run too fast without me!” despite being sick she was still so stubborn but she was happy and it’s been so long since she went outside.

The auburn haired girl tried to shout as loud as she can, “Then come find me Almond adeptus!”

Xiao knows the maze since he is the one who made it, he could just teleport to the gazebo but he wants to find her through going inside the maze.  

In just few minutes he reached the gazebo, “Found you.”

“That was too quick!” she was sitting on and resting her head on the edge of the gazebo.

She was sweating a lot then he put his palm on her forehead. “I told you not to run too fast. You’re really troublesome.”

“Well I’m your troublesome so take responsibility.”

She really have a way with words and never fails to make his hear beat rapidly, trying to regain his composure he replied “Let’s head back home, I think you have a fever.”

“Home?”

“I meant the mansion but we can go back to your-“

“You said that this mansion is too big, you won’t feel small if I live here! Two is better than one! So will you let me live here with you Xiao?”

“Tao, think carefully of your decision. It will be just the two of us here, won’t you miss your home at Liyue?” He kneeled and she hopped on his back, she tried to hide her face on the back of his shoulder along with her embarrassment, realizing what she said almost sound like a proposal.

So saving her little dignity, “Let’s just go inside first please.”

’Home is wherever you are Xiao.’

But those words were remained unsaid, maybe she will say it one day.

The pink cherry blossoms that turned to a darker shade of red was such a sight to see in autumn. Thankfully Xiao has those kinds of trees of planted in his realm and she could see it through the window. She has a plum blossom tree planted in her house but she could get used to here too. It was peaceful here unlike her house in Liyue that is in a bustling street, it was different but not unwelcome.

Recollecting the memories from yesterday, she was serious when she asked him to live here but it made her think, she doesn’t want to burden him anymore and she already asked too much from him. She was being too greedy and that needs to stop. Maybe it was better for her to go back to the parlor. The other side of the bed was cold so she stands up from the and eyes looking for a certain topaz eyed adeptus. It was a relief that tubby, the teapot guardian, was there to fend clothes for her and the white gown that tubby brought was the perfect size and the texture really feels comfortable.

She found him on the kitchen his back facing her, “Xiao? What are you doing?”

“Hey. How are feeling? Are you hungry? This will be done in a few minutes. You’re still unwell Hu, let me carry you back to our room.” He lowered the fire and got a cup of water then walked towards her who was sitting on one of the dining chairs.

“You’re cooking?”

He felt the tips of his ears reddening, “Uhh Yeah. I’m making abalone soup for you.”  Then he put down the cup of water in front of her and after, he put his palm on her forehead checking her temperature again, “Here, drink. You still have fever, you shouldn’t wander around.”

“I felt a little better so I can wait here and let’s eat together pretty pretty please.” she said after drinking the cup of water, the adeptus could cook and she never knew about it.

“Okay.” Then he went back to cook and the brunette was amaze by the view, his back facing her.

“So Xiao when did you learn to cook?” her chin was on the table, arms crossing and watching him mixing something in the pot.

His expression while cooking was serious but he never fails to answer her, “Just months ago.”

“I assume you learned from Yanxiao.”

“Yeah.”

“Pfft you certainly gave him a heart attack! I could imagine him holding a plate then it fell and broke when you asked him.” She was laughing while talking and Xiao couldn’t help but smile too while tasting the abalone soup.

“You aren’t wrong though, but he was holding a pot instead and it almost broke.” The room was filled with laughter, and the brunette felt relief that Xiao was laughing again. Her house isn’t a mansion but it made her feel small, the mansion was big but it felt better.

The food tastes much better when you eat with someone.  After they ate, they went to see the garden through the balcony but Xiao put many layers of coat on her even though it’s just in the balcony. The breeze was cool making her brown locks flutter and the red cherry leaves running in the wind. They were sitting side by side admiring the dawn and ocean, their pinkies almost touching.

Liyue harbor was never welcoming of her. She was saving this moment because she will return to the harbor when her fever is gone, and he will go back protecting Liyue.

“Why do you want to go to dragonspine?” among the two of them, it was alywas Hu tao who asked questions but now it’s the adeptus who asked her. It snows in Liyue too, so it made him wonder what is in dragonspine that made her want to go there.

“I heard there’s a tree where you can wish. The aurora borealis also looks close there! and–”

“– the snow there never melted away.”

Going back to Liyue never happened and her fever were gone too. She carefully sit up from the bed trying not to wake him up. Her crimson eyes gazing at his hair that have fallen to his face, her hands softly tucking his hair to the side and fingers tracing his face.  A sad smile was on her face because she admits she will miss this, being close to Xiao.

It was severely painful that her life was short but she never considered going against the nature. She is a mortal and death was already a fate to begin with. Archons offering something has a motive and the mortal didn’t like it because there’s always something to pay for. His life is precious and she wants for him to enjoy it.

Being on his side was already enough– maybe some day she will never let him go but this time a goodbye was needed so she could say hello again.  To say she is exhausted is an understatement, but she got used to it. He felt her voice become utterly weaker so she muster the energy to get a pen and a paper inside the drawer beside their bed.

Sleep wasn’t in her life cycle anymore, so she started writing, ‘To my almond adeptus, Thank you for always taking care of me your walnut, and for staying with me…...’ Writing is her best talent and she could express her feelings more when writing. Voicing it out might be little possible now since the butterflies around her glows more brightly. The butterfly was a sign when she woke up, and at some days it was a hallucination or maybe both at the same time. Writing drained her and she didn’t notice that the sun lights were already knocking on their window.

She felt tired but she will never get tired of him because he was her rest.

The bright red leaves have dried away, the same fate with her voice and the snow have started to fall.  Even Zhongli was busy, he always visited her and tells her stories. Zhongli agreed on her decision to stay in the realm with Xiao, he understands and knows that she won’t be lonely if the adeptus is with him. He trusts Xiao that Hu Tao is in good hands.

She didn’t go back and a sigh escaped from her lips because she feels she have forgotten something important. Despite her days numbered, she will always be grateful and happy. Xiao took care of her well and sometimes she wonders what do he feel, he was taking care of her instead of Liyue. He learned to cook and she always complimented his dish, he even tried to wash dishes too with her help, she was happy for him seeing his efforts trying things he decided to do so.  He doesn’t blend in but he still tries to understand how mortal lives, and she was always excited when he taught her things because she is learning more things about him.

A knock on her door disrupted her thoughts, and as the door opens he saw Xiao on the side of the door then there were also more figures past him rivaling the speed of light then she was engulfed in a hug.

“They were persistent so I let them in, I will head out first.” Understanding the situation, Hu Tao nodded before Xiao went outside the room.

The navy blue haired was hugging her tight and the brunette hugged her back too, then the latter tugged the former’s shirt and pointed to the chair. Xiangling sat on the chair, and Hu Tao could notice that she already cried because of the redness in her eyes. Months ago, the brunette thought that Xiangling will burst into tears, and in front her was a girl biting her lips trying her best to hold back the tears again.

“…you ..can… cry y…ou know.” Then Xiangling wails after hearing Hu Tao’s voice.

“I-I understand that you didn’t tell us.” Hu Tao looked at her and telling through the smile that it’s okay.

“And that the guardian yaksha is even your boyfriend now. I promise to keep it a secret. I thought we are gonna die! Chongyun grabbed him you know!“  Xiangling was always bad at secrets, the brunette wanted to tell that he isn’t her boyfriend but she made a little smile because that is how Xiangling is.

Xiangling is always bubbly and it made her feel at ease, then she continued the story, “Then Xingqiu grabbed your boyrfriend’s legs and I also grabbed the other one. I thought we are gonna die when he teleported us here!”

“Before he brought us here- Chongyun didn’t eat anything spicy by the way. We begged the guardian yaksha to bring us to you and he just sighed so we thought he will left us but I admire Chongyun’s desperation and it helped us too. Oh and you know someone was also looking for you when I went to Beidou’s ship. Here.”

Hu Tao read the content of the letter and accepted the gift, she get another a paper and wrote something then put it in an envelope. She handed it to Xiangling, “Alright. I promise to deliver him this carefully! And will put my best to cook the most delicious fish ever!”

Xiangling continued to tell her adventures in the crux ship, “I think I’m taking too long but I will always visit you and bring my new dish to you! Please tell me if you want any dish! I hope your boyfriend wouldn’t kill me.”

The brunette really like listening to her stories, then Hu Tao hugged her and Xiangling insisted to make a pinky promise before she left, “I promise I will see you again. Pinky promise.”

Then it was Xingqiu’s time to talk to her “My Liege.”

“My comrade. My reading buddy. My poetry partner. It’s been a while. Are you keeping well?  If you’re feeling unwell I could just-” Xingqiu is always a caring person and in just the past months he matured a little.

“do..n.t.. …go” she holds his hand and gave it a little squeeze.

“I will stay. I won’t take too much of your time but I promise to visit you always.” He holds her hand and squeezed it back too.

“My book won a place and it is thanks to you. I brought you a copy and some books I found interesting too.” Hu tao is his muse and inspiration, but she didn’t need to know that. They always bond with books and poetry, she admits that she miss those times writing with him.

“Tha..nk.. …you Xing..qiu …and get.. so..me rest… too…” he was good at hiding his burden but he can’t escape the brunette’s perceptive eyes.

It was a while when he heard her voice, he gave her hand another squeeze “I will. Don’t push yourself too much Tao.”

He told her stories about his trip in Inazuma and found many book booth there. Maybe someday he will bring her there too, if they see each other again. Then his other hand pick something in his pocket, while his other hand was still holding her hand.

“May I?” she nods, granting him permission to put the ring on her pinky finger.

“It’s a friendship ring I found in Inazuma. Let’s play cards with the four of us sometimes.” Inazuma has a tale that if you tie a red string on your finger with another person, you’ll meet them again too. Xingqiu has a matching ones too, and if he meets her again she will be always his muse.

He was holding back his tear but immediately fall when he was far away from her room, he didn’t want her to see him cry. While Hu Tao was staring at the ring trying to hold back her tears too, she is glad Xingqiu is her friend.

“Blossom?” it was Chongyun’s turn and he rarely calls her blossom. Fire and Ice, they always bicker and banter. He was used to her calling him silly nicknames but he came up with one too.

She smiled at him, and every time she smiled like that it always annoys him. It was easy for her to rile him up. His eyes still looks like the light sky, but he smiled back a little.

“May I hold your hand? I know you’re already making snarky comments.” They may be the fire and ice but they were the clouds and blossoms too. An exorcist and a funeral director. She held his hands and feel the lack of warmth, she hold it tightly. The two of them banters but they understand each other well too.

As he stares in her eyes, the fire wasn’t there anymore but her hand is still warm. He was looking down and brought her hands to his forehead.

“You always disappear without telling us.” Chongyun was always a soft hearted person but he can be brutally honest too sometimes, and Hu Tao likes that part of him. She is comfortable with him to the point she asks him for critics in her poetry.

“For once, I was scared.” ‘ I was scared that I’ll never see you again, without telling goodbye.’

“You know I even considered talking to spirits just to find your where abouts but you know how bad my energy is to them. We don’t even have clues to where you are. Don’t do that again Blossom.” His eyes looking at her with sincerity.

“Hu Tao I– “

“ –  I miss you.”

“…..I ..mi.ss.. …you.. too.. Clo..ud…”

He admits he miss her voice, their banters, her pranks, and he was on the verge of crying right now. They bicker but this time they were both honest with their feelings. She was always the fire igniting his competitive side, he was the ice melting her worries away.

“…I..m ..o..ka.y..” she hugs him because his tears betrayed him, falling without a warning.

He couldn’t tell her, how he feels. He doesn’t want to burden her with his feelings when she was already taking too much pain right now. The blue haired exorcist wants to stay by her side too but he is a cloud.

A cloud who is so close yet so far to the blossom tree dancing with the wind.

And he is just content with watching from a far.

“I have nothing to offer but I promise you can always count on me.” He wasn’t supposed to be crying in front of her now but in the end the two of them were crying right now.

The next time they meet, he will make sure he won’t just be a cloud watching from a far.

“Let’s hunt spirits in the Wuwang hill again, Hexagram Hat.”

She watched his back walking towards the door and closed her eyes when she heard the door shut. Her hands rubbing her eyes trying to dry the tears but it was all overflowing, she just let it be and leaned on the headboard of the bed.

Then she felt something dip in her bed and little hands embracing her. She thought no one was already visiting her but she could feel her tears bursting again because Qiqi remembered her and coming to her place despite the memory problems.

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” Hu Tao could feel her heart swell because Qiqi always said she is warm but it is different and she doesn’t like it. But the little girl is in her bed hugging and telling her I love you. It reminds the brunette when she always hug the violet haired little girl and says I love you when the latter is panicking and worrying about the forgotten orders.

She embraced the little girl and kiss its forehead. “ ..Hu..Tao… lo…v..es… Qi.q..i.. ..too.”

“Qiqi picked herbs for Taotao.”

“Qiqi remembers. Qiqi read on her notebook.”

“Qiqi misses Walnut.” The brunette gave her a little squeeze on the back and buried her face on the  little girl’s shoulder, the zombie kid wrote about her enemy. The notebook was important to the zombie kid and Hu Tao was thankful that she was written in it, the zombie kid even misses her.

“Qiqi can help the garden. Can Qiqi stay here?” it was a mystery how did Qiqi end up in the serenitea realm, she will just ask Xiao later. The pyro vision holder nods at the cryo vision holder as an answer. She wouldn’t mind Qiqi staying here as long as the kid is far away from green haired doctor but he was the little girl’s guardian.

“Qiqi feels sleepy.” The little girl’s eyes were already droopy then her eyelids finally dropped and succumb to sleep. Qiqi was probably tired from gathering herbs since morning then heading to the realm at night and waiting for her turn. Carefully tucking the little girl in the bed then her hands caressing the soft violet locks.

She didn’t need to open her eyes because she knows it’s Xiao who were on the other side of the bed, trying her best to utter the words “T.ha..nk ..yo..u ..X.i..ao..”

“Anything for you. Don’t worry, I promise to take care of Qiqi.” ‘Even when you’re no longer here.’

She opened her eyes, dull crimson blossom staring at unyielding gold ones “I..am ..so..rry.. too.. fo..r ..t..aki..ng ..yo.u..r …t.ime..– “

“Do not be sorry, Tao.”

“I am doing this because I wanted to, I am delighted to be by your side. I want to spend this lifetime with you and I will never regret every second of it.”

“I am glad I met you.”

The crimson eyed mortal was the one who always initiate a conversation and the golden eyed adeptus was a man of few words. They mostly spend their time in silence now, it wasn’t awkward, but it was comforting.  He understands her thoughts and she answers him by gestures, sometimes she writes on paper.

It was cold outside and they were sitting in front of the fireplace, her head comfortably leaning on his lap while he combs her hair. Finally, Hu Tao finished knitting the mittens she plan to gave Xiao then she held his hand and relieved when the yellow mittens fits his hand perfectly.

“Thank you.” A soft smile painted on his face.

She still tried to smile despite her weak constitution, she tugged on his sleeves and mouthed ‘dragonspine.’

His smile have fallen turning into a serious one, the wind doesn’t feel good.  He carried her to their bed, then after braiding her hair and clipping crystalcore hairpin on her hair, he put many layers of thick coats on her and a black beanie partnered with red mittens.

“Let’s go.” He carried her like a princess and in just a blink of an eye they were in dragonspine.

“Are you okay?” he asked, worrying if she felt motion sickness when they teleported and she answered by nodding at him.

Everything was painted with white, some of the trees have withered that never came back to life, it was raining of snowflakes and she was smiling a little that almost like a laugh because of the patches of snow in his hair. They went to the top of the mountain to watch the aurora borealis.

Shades of green and blue lights were dancing brightly in the sky.

“You’re right, the lights looks pretty up close here.” They stayed for a while enjoying the view basking in silence, and when she tugged on his sleeves. He knows.

“Alright.”

Everything was frozen in dragonspine, he wish that time would stop too but at the end of the horizon the sun comes down and will rise again. The frostbearing tree was glowing crimson red, there were butterflies too at the branches of the tree, he wish he could just unsee it.

He put her down and help her to stand then they offered the crimson agate they have along with the wish they wanted to say in a silent voice.

She was looking at him and he knew what she wanted say so he replied with a smile but his eyes betrayed him, “It’s a secret.”

‘I wish that one day, we could finally go to Liyue harbor happily together to pick silk flowers like we used to.’

He will keep that wish in his grave, he wonders what did she wish too. It was time to go so he carried her again but this time she was in his back. “Let’s go home Hu Tao.”

And as they walk away from the frostbearing tree, the sound of snow crushing underneath him, their footsteps leaving traces behind.

He heard her serene voice once again for the last time.

“X..i..ao… Yo.u.re.. …my …h..ome..”

And in that moment the snow withered the plum blossom in her eyes and he wish that the time would freeze.

The warmth hands that squeeze him a while ago were no longer holding him. The silence was deafening and he could feel the weight for every step he take, he could feel the blurriness of his eyes and tears threatening to fall as he continues to walk looking at the road filled with snows, the wind was cold but the only coldness he could feel was the lack of warmth in her face.

His heart was beating rapidly and he could feel the snow enveloping it, his lungs were tight and there was no room to breathe, he wanted to shout but there were no screams.

He could easily teleport away but she always like walking with him, “Let’s walk together Xiao!” he holds on to those words because this will be the last time they are walking together.

Every step was agonizing.

She was his home too.

Time is cruel to humans, Zhongli said to him before.

But it wasn’t just to humans, because it felt cruel for him too.

They were on her funeral, he could hear the cries of her friends, the gloom in their eyes, the sadness lingering in the air, everything feels heavy so the adeptus took one last glance on her picture frame then he went outside to breathe.

He found the consultant outside too.

He could not find the right words to ask, “How…. did you…. when lady …..?”

Zhongli knew beforehand that Xiao are capable of emotions, they went through many centuries and the consequences of every battles. Immortals are capable of emotions too after all. But it was the first time he saw Xiao adored someone this much, just like how he adored her.

“The days will pass but it never ceased, you will learn to live through it.” Zhongli said as he stares blankly at the bouquet of glaze lilies decorated outside the parlor.

Xiao was still looking down and only looked at the consultant to nod when the latter said “I am going to head back now for I still have duties to do. Here, it’s one of her final wishes.”

A letter.

His hands were shaking , droplet of tears falling to the letter, golden eyes trying to focus on every word she wrote.

Gripping the letter tightly as he put it close to his heart when he finished reading, ‘Don’t fret for I Hu Tao, will always watch over you and will never leave your side. Let us meet again, Alatus.’

“Do not get sick there anymore, Hu Tao.”

The sun has come again, the flowers were coming back to life, the cold breeze were gone but he was still looking at the foot steps they left behind on the snow. She was his sunshine, she was his spring, she was his winter too.  Every look at the corner of the room, every silk flowers he saw, every butterflies he captures, he remembers her. His heart still aches but he was relieved that he could still remember her. It was easy to forget, it was difficult to remember.

He holds onto her word, that they will meet again.

And maybe one day the snow will melt too.