Chapter Text
It was early evening when Oli left his grove and descended into the river valley. The deer who'd gathered in the uplands for the night watched him go, noting the change in his demeanor and wondering what had happened. Rarely was he so agitated. Not even the appearance of humans had seemed to bother him, and now here he was disappearing in a huff with his ears laid back, seemingly over nothing. The deer's concern was only temporary, of course. When no immediate threat showed itself, they returned to browsing and troubled themselves no further.
Oli envied their ease. Usually, he found peace at this time, when the sun had just disappeared and the blue of twilight had not yet settled over the trees. There would be no peace tonight however, or any other night, until he learned why the fae had suddenly decided to break their truce with him.
He’d seen the crows himself, masses of shrieking bodies that still managed to keep shape even among the dense trees. They’d stayed to the south at first, and he’d assumed they were just curious about the humans who’d been making their way along the river there. Today though, they’d moved farther into the valley, lingering above the main channel and the nixen’s territory before drawing back and disappearing. Nothing had manifested beyond that, but Oli was still on edge. The last fae he’s dealt with this far east had later been imprisoned for their actions.
By comparison, the humans seemed almost harmless. There were only four, all men. Oli had been watching them for three days now, keeping himself hidden from their sight. One, he assumed it was the leader, sometimes ventured up to the meadows to hunt, but they hadn't caused any serious trouble, and he almost wanted to put them out of his mind; it would have certainly been easier.
Even so, the thought of the men crossing into the Courtlands, unaware of the danger and almost certainly to their deaths, did not sit well with him, especially if he could have prevented it. Perhaps tomorrow, after he'd assured himself the nixen were safe, he would go to the southern stream and offer his help. Whether or not they accepted it was their own affair.
The sloping terrain leveled out as Oli neared the valley floor. Shrub gave way to scattered brakes of fern and nettle, some so high they brushed against his belly. The breeze of the hills disappeared, leaving the air heavy and damp. And far too quiet.
Oli quickened his pace. He passed beneath draping branches of spruce and pine then through narrow rock passages until he found himself beside the river channel. As he'd expected, the banks and outcroppings were empty. The nixen were there, he could sense them beneath the water, but the vibrancy he'd come to associate with them was clouded by fear and unease.
A shudder of anger raised the fur on Oli's nape and down his spine. Fear had no place here. The silence itself felt wrong. There should have been singing this time of nignt, soft voices crooning lullabies to little ones and filling the stillness with low evening songs. Oli closed his eyes and let his consciousness drift into the forest, searching for any sign of fae. With each push, he worried what he might find, but the search revealed nothing, and he let himself come back to the quiet channel.
Someone must have noticed his presence by now. Nixen were wary as a rule, as he had learned early on in his time here. It still surprised him sometimes that they'd come to trust him, even going so far as to give him a name in their own language and allow him to freely approach the river. He only hoped he could remain worthy of that trust.
A movement caught the corner of Oli's eye. He glanced across to the opposite bank, where the water had eroded the soil beneath a tree, leaving a cage of bare roots hanging over the water. A silvery face had appeared beneath it. For a moment, the pair simply watched each other in silence, then the nixe slowly drifted from her hiding place. As she drew closer, Oli saw that it was Esha, one of the clan matriarchs. He inclined his head to her respectfully, then knelt on the bank so she would not have to crane her neck to look at him.
"Is everything alright?" He asked.
Esha nodded. "Yes, we are safe. We wondered if you would come."
"I didn't think they would fly so close to the stream. I thought they were only curious about the humans or I would have come here sooner."
Esha made a soft sound, dismissive without malice. "You're here now. And I thank you for that." She smiled faintly, though it faded just as quickly as it had appeared. "They haven't come this far east in years. Not since before you brought Zven to us. I never thought they would again. We haven't done anything to provoke them."
The pair exchanged knowing looks and Oli pushed away a memory as it tried to resurface.
“I won’t let that happen here," he said calmly.
Esha nodded. Weariness hung heavy about her, and Oli sensed there was something else troubling besides the immediate safety of the river.
"Is Zven around?” he asked. “I didn't hear him tonight."
"He's down in the pools. He stays there mostly these days; more space. They passed that way, though. I know he’s old enough to be on his own, but I’m still worried for him.”
Oli nodded. “I’ll make sure he’s alright.”
“Thank you.”
Oli noted a sadness in Esha’s eyes, but she disappeared beneath the water without another word, leaving him alone on the bank. He cast one last glance around the empty river before continuing on his way.
Farther along, the water grew more swift, weaving among slabs of stone until it tumbled it down over a broken cliff. Other streamlets gathered there from the uplands, joining with springs to feed a series of deep pools before traveling underground and emerging to the south. Oli soon arrived at the edge of one such pool. A sheer wall rose high along one side, verdant and worn by age and rainwater. Several trees leaned precariously over its edge. Others had already fallen and now lay half-submerged in the dark water.
As he settled himself on the bank, a sharp splash pulled Oli's attention to the far side of the pool. He looked in time to see a pale shape disappear back into the water, ripples moving out from the base of the wall. Oli watched in silence. The shape moved closer, lithe and silvery in the fading light, until it was at the bank and clawed hands appeared to grasp the edge. A strong-browed face appeared shortly after. As soon as the creature saw Oli, it yelped and disappeared.
Oli peered over the bank in confusion.
"Zven?"
The nix reappeared slowly, first his pale eyes peeking over the bank, then the rest of his face.
“Oh, Oli, it's just you."
Oli frowned. "Did you think I was someone else?"
"No, I just didn't expect anyone to be there. You're too quiet.
"I'm sorry I scared you."
Zven flashed him a grin as he pushed the hair out of his eyes. "It'd take more than that to really scare me.
"Is it alright that I'm here?" Oli asked. "I'm not interrupting your supper, am I?"
"What?" Zven blinked, then seemed to remember the speckled fish that was still clutched in his hand. "Oh, no, not at all. You know I like to see you." With that, he climbed up and sat on the edge of the pool, legs dangling in the water as if nothing had ever happened. "So, what brings you here tonight? Were the deer being too loud? I know how much they like to talk."
Oli let out a shaky huff, the closest thing to laughter his current form allowed. "They were surprisingly quiet tonight. But I'll let you know if I hear anything interesting." He paused, debating how to continue. As it had been at the river, he'd sensed Zven's fear and apprehension as he approached the pool. Some of it had come from the brief startle, but that had faded away by now. The rest simmered beneath the surface, hidden under feigned ease.
"I just wanted to make sure you were alright," he said finally.
A brief frown passed across Zven’s face. “I’m fine. Why wouldn't I be?"
Oli shrugged and glanced around the clearing. "It's very quiet tonight."
Zven let out a low hum. “Is it? I hadn’t noticed.”
“Someone is usually singing. I’m surprised you weren’t. I know you enjoy it.”
"I was hunting." Zven's voice remained amiable but there was a tension growing behind it. As if to make a point, he grabbed the fish and began to eat, effectively ending the conversation.
Oli didn't press him. Of all the creatures he'd encountered in this place, Zven might very well have been the most stubborn; and that was including an old pine spirit he'd once met on a wind-swept mountain ridge. Zven knew full well that Oli could sense emotions, but that never seemed to stop him from trying to hide them anyway.
"There are humans here," Oli mused after a while, "They're sleeping under a cliff by the southern stream."
"I know," Zven replied through a mouthful of fish. "The birds wouldn't stop screaming about them."
“I watched them earlier today. I think one of them is sick. They’re afraid.” Oli paused. “I can tell you’re afraid too, and it’s not because of me."
Zven stiffened. It was a brief movement, almost imperceptible, but the anger that rose to overshadow his fear was unmistakable.
"I'm not afraid,” he snapped. He turned and looked at Oli suspiciously, bordering on a glare.“Why are you here, really? Did Esha put you up to this?”
Oli frowned, taken aback by the sudden aggression but keeping his voice calm. “I’d planned to come here anyway. Esha met me at the river."
"What did she tell you?"
"Only that you were staying mostly in the pools now. And that she was worried about you.”
Zven shook his head dismissively, tossing away the remains of the fish. “She doesn’t need to worry about me. She's a matriarch now, there are plenty of other things to worry about."
Oli sighed. "The fact that she's a matriarch is exactly why she's worried about you. She's responsible for the safety of the clan, and unless you've decided to leave, that includes you." The nix let out a grumbled huff but didn't say anything. Oli's voice softened. "She's looked after you since you were a pup, Zven. She cares very much for you."
"Well, I'm not a pup anymore, am I?" Zven replied cooly. "I can take care of myself. And I don’t need you to tell me how the clan works. If I want to leave it, I will."
For a long moment, Oli thought Zven as going to disappear back into the pool. Frustration and anger rolled off him like a cold mist, feeling as foreign and wrong as the silence of the river. He wondered if he’d made a mistake bringing up the fear so quickly. Yes, perhaps he had. And who knew how long it would be until Zven was willing to listen again. Oli closed his eyes and sighed.
"No, you aren't," he said quietly. "I'm sorry that I upset you." He waited a few moments, but Zven didn't reply. Eventually, Oli stood and turned to leave, assuming the silence meant he was no longer welcome. He made it to the edge of the clearing before the nix called after him.
"Wait?"
Oli glanced back. To his surprise, Zven was watching him with wide eyes. All traces of the earlier aggression had disappeared. He looked scared.
"I…don't leave. Please."
Silently, Oli returned to the bank and settled himself down once more, remaining close but giving Zven space to decide what he wanted to do. The nix hadn't looked at him again. He seemed to keep his gaze anywhere else, his shoulders curling inward as he rested his arms on his knees.
A long silence fell. Oli closed his eyes and breathed deeply, letting himself drift away through it. The trees disappeared, as did the pool and the clearing. Even Zven faded until he was only a faint pulse of cold. Oli could feel the forest itself now. It moved all around them, vast and overarching, thrumming with warmth and energy. For a moment, there was nothing to worry about; no humans, no threat of the fae, no wondering how he was supposed to go about confronting difficult emotions without inciting anger. Oli often found himself here, losing track of hours. More and more, he wanted to stay and never come out, but he knew he could not; not now. Slowly, he let himself drift back. When he returned, Zven was staring into the dark pool with an unreadable expression, knees drawn up to his chest.
“I saw crows today,” he said. The sharp tone had left his voice completely, leaving behind something detached and vulnerable. “Swarms. You must have seen them too.”
“Yes," Oli replied gently, "That's why I came here."
Zven continued to stare at the water. He'd started to absently rub his arms, grazing over the long healed-scars that ran down both. “Do you think it was them?”
For the second time that evening, a memory pressed at Oli's mind. This time, he let it in, revisiting the grim scene as though he stood there in the flesh. Everything was so clear: the water, still agitated and slowly filling with dark blood; the four rogue fae on the bank, laughing and jeering at the carnage. Oli had killed one of them. It would surprise him later that he had, but in the moment there were more important things; namely, the single faint pulse of life left among the dead
Oli waded in up to his flanks to reach it, digging through a dense patch of water weed until a small mottled form appeared. The pup was badly scratched, but it still managed to flail at him with little clawed hands as he lifted it from the poisoned water and wrapped it in a swath of moss.
By the time Oli reached the river valley, the nixen were waiting for him, wary and on edge from the news, but eager to take the pup into their keeping. Oli would have left then, if they'd asked him to, but they had not, and now he sat on the edge of another pool, wishing he could assure his frightened friend that there was nothing to worry about.
"I don't know if it was them," he said. "The last I heard, they'd been imprisoned. But whatever we saw today never left that form, so I can't say for sure. I'm sorry."
“What if it was?” Zven’s voice was barely a whisper. "What if they come back for me? What if they come for this clan too?" He was starting to shake now, breath coming in shallow gasps, the grip on his arms so tight he nearly drew blood.
Sensing the rising panic, Oli reached out and put a hand on his back, just below his neck. Zven tensed at the touch but didn't pull away, so Oli let his hand rest for a moment, not applying pressure, simply reminding he was there. When he felt Zven relax, he began to move it in a slow circle, pressing up along the nix's spine and over his shoulder blades.
“I won’t let them hurt you again, Zven. You or anyone else. If they come here, I will deal with them.”
It was difficult to read the nuances of a deer’s face, even more so in Oli's case. Even his voice rarely changed from its measured calm. Still, there was something in it now when Zven turned to look at him that left no questions, so he didn't ask any. He simply nodded, and Oli squeezed his shoulder gently before letting go.
As soon as he did, Zven felt inexplicably cold. The sensation surrounded him, clinging on like tangled water vines. It wasn’t the familiar, welcoming chill of water that he was used to either. This was deeper, almost frightening, and try as he might, it would not go away. His hands gripped desperately at the edge of the bank. He clenched his jaw until it hurt, and it was only Oli's voice that finally brought him back down again.
"Zven? Are you alright?
No, he wasn't. He was terrified. Terrified of the crows and the cold and the idea that he might be left alone to face them. His mind was no help, one half insisting that he was far beyond the age of hiding when something scared him, and the other that he would have to leave this river eventually so he might as well get used to relying on himself.
Zven was near the point of screaming in frustration when another thought came to him. He considered it, somewhat bewildered. No, that would be ridiculous. Hadn't he just insisted he wasn't a pup anymore? And what if it made Oli want to leave again? He didn't know if he could bear that possibility a second time. Zven spent several moments deliberating, during which the cold feeling spread to his chest, pressing until he could hardly breath. Eventually, he decided that he could try. If Oli pulled away, that would be that and he would disappear into the pool, but he could try.
Zven let his hands slide free from the dirt. His fingers had gone stiff and still shook faintly if he didn't try to keep them still. He took a deep breath and let it out, then, without a word, shifted back from the water and curled up against Oli’s flank.
The tension was awful. Zven stayed perfectly still, hardly daring to breath as he waited for the inevitable movement or word of disapproval that would signal an end to his last grasp for comfort. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest.
In the end, the fear turned out to be all in his own head. Oli remained where he sat, as quiet and calm as Zven remembered him being so many years ago, when he would rest beside the river channel in the heat of the day. He'd always been so patient. Sometimes, a gaggle of the braver pups would cimb the bank and plop themselves beside the strange deer creature, eventually dozing off in the dappled shade. They weren't afraid. Oli might have looked intimidating on first glance, but they knew he wouldn't hurt them, and if they ever did feel scared, their elders and the safety of the water were only a leap away.
Zven finally allowed himself to relax, resting fully against Oli's side. The fur beneath his skin was somewhat coarse, but it was also warm and smelled comfortingly of the forest. He closed his eyes, taking in the familiar scent of damp earth and moss and decaying wood. Gradually, the cold feeling began to diminish.
Oli, meanwhile, felt Zven's heartbeat shift from erratic to calm as the overwhelming anxiety subsided into a vague notion. He'd been somewhat surprised when the nix moved to curl up next to him, but he was pleased to see Zven at peace for perhaps the first time that night and wasn't about to disturb him.
As much as Oli hated to think about it, it wasn't beyond the realm of possibility that the fae had escaped. They might have even been released. While the general politics of fae courts meant little to him, and he rarely concerned himself with their business, it was on the understanding that if he didn't bother them, they in turn wouldn't bother him. He had no misgivings about the group that had killed Zven's clan. If they wanted to terrorize, they would do it, and it didn't matter who or where.
Oli glanced down at Zven. By now, the nix had drifted off into half-sleep, one hand curled into the ridge of fur along Oli’s spine, the other held close to his own chest. Every so often, his fingers would twitch, or the space at the top of his nose would wrinkle briefly into a frown, but his breathing remained even and there was nothing to be felt except a profound sense of safety.
Content to let him rest, Oli leaned against the remains of a tree trunk; it had fallen long ago, its once- magnificent form now soft from moss and decay. Oli shifted until he was comfortable, then listened as the sounds of night began in earnest. Choruses of insects and nightjars harmonized together over the distant rush of falling water. An owl called, waiting patiently for an answer that finally came from somewhere to the north. A single faint breeze rippled through the canopy high above them. On some nights, if the wind was right and he listened very closely, Oli would hear the faint music of revelry far away in the Courtlands. There was only silence tonight, but that was just as well.
After a long while, when Oli had nearly drifted off to sleep himself, Zven spoke softly beside him.
“Oli?" He paused, hesitant. "You know you’re important to us, don’t you? To this place?”
Oli blinked. “Am I?” He felt Zven nod.
“Yes, you are. Nixen don’t trust lightly, but we trust you. You’ve never hurt us. Ever.”
“I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone. Not without cause.”
“We know you don’t.” Zven nestled closer to him. "Will you stay in the valley tonight?"
"Will you sleep better if I do?"
"Yes. And the others."
"Yes."
Long after the twilight had faded and the stars appeared, the call of the water finally forced Zven into wakefulness. He moved slowly, yawning and stretching like a forest cat. The moon had risen by then as well and his eyes reflected faintly as he pressed his forehead against Oli’s cheek.
"Thank you." He paused, then said, "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I know you weren't trying to make me angry."
Oli tossed his head slightly, letting out a soft huff that ruffled Zven's hair. All was forgiven.
Zven stared at him curiously as he pulled away. For a moment, he could have sworn he'd seen a flash of something in Oli's eyes. A light? A color? He blinked, hoping to catch it again, but there was nothing now except familiar gleaming dark. Perhaps he’d only imagined it; he was absolutely exhausted. The pool was calm now, inviting him in with a promise of rest. With a last glance back, Zven returned willingly, disappearing into the water with hardly a splash.
Sleep did not come to Oli for a long time. He couldn't stop thinking about what Zven had said. Even if the idea had occurred to him before, it always felt different to be told outright. He'd never intended to become important to this place, or anything in it. He knew he was far older, even if he couldn't remember exactly how old he really was, and there were cycles at work here that he would never be a part of. Still, he wouldn't have given it up. Not for anything.
Oli sighed and lifted his head to gaze at the stars that filled the gap above the pool. Without the hindrance of cloud or mist, they seemed to him a depthless river flowing through the darkness, rivaled only by the cold light of a half-moon. Oli sometimes wondered if he'd once been up there with them, some time in a past life he could no longer remember.
Was it better that he couldn't? He felt an urge to ponder, as he always seemed to with such a question, but he already knew the answer would never come to him. It never had, even after so many years. Resigned, Oli laid his head on his arms, closed his eyes, and slept.