Work Text:
[You are signed in as Darknight]
Diluc logs in to his streamer account, already quite distracted thinking about his stream content for the day. He has been spending quite a bit of his time and money playing this new supposedly open-world RPG game which he thinks, in reality, is just a gacha game with all the fancy details. At first, he was quite skeptical about trying this game out. The game seemed more like eye candy than actual gameplay, but he was pleasantly surprised to find out he liked it more than he thought he would. He was generally disinterested at the beginning but warmed up to the game a little too fast once he saw his favorite character strutting and clapping as he showed up for the first time in the cutscene.
Diluc's favorite character is the Cavalry Captain, Kaeya Alberich.
Diluc found himself completely bewitched the moment he laid his pretty red eyes on Kaeya. The reason was probably that the Cavalry Captain reminded him so much of his husband, but he's not about to admit that out loud. Diluc was so enamored he pulled out his wallet and was about to swipe his black card, ready to throw away his money at this character that caught his eye. It turned out, Kaeya was actually a story-obtained 4-star character, so he didn't even have to spend a single coin at all.
The sharp burst of happiness he felt in his chest when he saw Kaeya permanently added to his team free of charge almost made his tears fall down his cheeks. That was when he decided he would do anything to make his favorite character the strongest he can be. Of course, Diluc liked Kaeya a bit too much he didn't even once think that Kaeya was a subpar 4 star who was meant to only rot in the mines. So the whiplash he got when he checked out other content creator's videos to look for Kaeya guides was immense.
Diluc can't imagine other people hating on the Cavalry Captain so much, but the tier list positions and the comments he saw proved otherwise. He had slammed his laptop close in frustration, and his precious husband even had to ask him about it.
That was when he decided he will make his Kaeya so damn strong that all the people bashing his favorite character will bow down and repent for their sorry mistake of even uttering a single word of blasphemy against Sir Kaeya Alberich.
Diluc is an absolutely rich man. With him being the sole heir of a brewery empire, it is nothing but a short change to get every single character to constellation 6 and every single weapon to refinement 5; it won't even cause a dent in his bank account. And what better way to spend his endless fortune than to whale in this stupid gacha game for his favorite character? He had nothing to lose and everything to gain. His spite fueled him to raise Kaeya Alberich from a 4-star freebie character to an absolute monster of a 4 star on par with the 5-star characters. That will teach all the people who said Kaeya was only a starter character to be replaced by other cryo characters, his potential nonexistent and his skills lacking.
Since Diluc didn't have to swipe his card to obtain Kaeya, he decided he would whale for the weapon that he thought was a perfect fit for Kaeya, the Aquila Favonia sword. In terms of meta and aesthetics, there was really nothing that can top Aquila Favonia for Kaeya, it was a match made in heaven. So he didn't hesitate at all and even streamed his whale session to get his refinement 5 Aquila Favonia when it was on rate-up on the weapon banner. That video was how he gained a lot of other fellow Kaeya enthusiasts who became his eventual loyal viewers.
Diluc considered every single possible artifact build for Kaeya, crunching numbers and deciding the most optimal way to make Kaeya hit harder than a 5 star. He leveled a lot of artifacts to test everything out but ended up with his godly perfect substats 4 piece gladiator set. He was a firm believer of physical damage Kaeya, with Kaeya's basic attack multiplier almost on par with the popular 5-star claymore character, the winery owner. Diluc also did not slack on his Kaeya's talents, with him sitting at all level 10 talents, his Kaeya crowned three times. That was how much he adored Sir Kaeya Alberich.
With all these in mind, Diluc made a lot of various Kaeya showcase videos, as well as countless How To Build Kaeya videos. Indeed, he was known to be the biggest Kaeya simp, as his beloved viewers loved to call him. He's not even about to refute that true statement, but even he gets a little shy about it sometimes.
Unfortunately, no matter how many sacrifices he did to make his Kaeya the strongest Kaeya in the entire world of Teyvat, he had never been graced with the kindness of even a single Kaeya constellation from the standard banner. It almost hurt Diluc, as he rarely pulled in the limited banner, all his primogems were spent on the standard banner after he had gotten his refinement 5 Aquila Favonia. And yet, he had never seen a single Kaeya constellation come home to him. His only constellation, the first constellation, was from the time where Kaeya showed up on Paimon's Bargains. Diluc didn't even think twice and bought Kaeya's constellation 1 right after he had logged in that day.
Oh, the absolute tragedy of being crowned as the biggest Kaeya simp without having more than one constellation.
Nonetheless, Diluc doesn't see it as a rejection, but as a challenge. He had made every single one of his Kaeya videos with a zero constellation and one constellation Kaeya. Surely, that will show all the non-Kaeya believers just how strong Kaeya is without that much constellations, so much more if he had Kaeya with full constellations.
Enough is enough, Diluc thinks. It's about time for him to acknowledge himself and live up to his title as a whale. Initially, he didn't want to whale that much because he didn't want to be asked too personal questions about his job and the likes. But this time, he has his heart set on getting his well-deserved constellation 6 Kaeya. He's not going to stop swiping his card until he gets what he wants. Just a few hours ago, Diluc gave his bank a call regarding his future gacha endeavor to inform them not to freeze his account no matter what happens.
"Oh, Sir Diluc is up for whaling again," Lisa, his trusty financial advisor, teased, "I hope you get your constellation 6 Kaeya then." Lisa had said while giggling to herself.
Diluc wants the ground to eat him up at the memory of that conversation, but it had to be done, and it is over with. On another note, he's just a little bit jelly that his husband currently has a constellation 6 Diluc with a refinement 5 Wolf's Gravestone. His husband has never even gotten any of the other standard 5 star characters because it always ends up with Mondstadt's Uncrowned King gracing him with a constellation, and effortlessly too. Not to mention, as much as Diluc is a Kaeya Alberich simp, his husband is a Diluc Ragnvindr simp too, with his Diluc probably also being the strongest in the world of Teyvat. If there's a reason why Diluc hates the red-haired winery tycoon, that is most probably why.
Diluc takes a deep sigh and turns on his stream. As his stream is voice only, he doesn't bother with appearances and only makes sure his mic and his voice are in perfect condition. He greets his viewers gracefully, as he always does, and talks a little about what will happen in his stream today.
"As you all know, I have been thinking about completing Kaeya's constellations for a while. And today is the day I'm going to make that happen."
The viewers' chatbox fills up with messages.
[Darknight is going to whale for Sir Kaeyaaa!]
[May the rng gods bless u]
Diluc takes a quick glance at the chatbox, and the messages never fail to amuse him.
"I've never really whaled for any other character before. But Kaeya deserves it, and I deserve a constellation 6 Kaeya. I won't stop rolling until I get all his constellations."
[C6 Kaeya go brrrrr]
[Wow how loaded is Darknight? To whale for a free chara with no guarantee, he must be rich af!]
[WHEN ARE WE GETTING KAEYA RATE UP M1H0Y0?! YOU COWARDS I WANT C6 KAEYA TOO!]
The last message catches Diluc off guard, and he lets a little laugh slip past his lips.
"We won't be getting a Kaeya rate up anytime soon. Not when the community hates the free characters."
The stream of chats through the chatbox rolls faster than Diluc's eyes can catch, so he decides to ready himself for his little wish ritual. He teleports to Dawn Winery, sets the winery tycoon as his current character, and glides his way to the winery. He parks the winery tycoon beside the infamous flower vase, and Diluc takes another sigh as he opens the Wish banner. He is lying to himself if he says he's not nervous at all. He glances at his current primogem count, he has 80,000 primogems to spend, patiently begging for the Cavalry Captain to come home to him until he's satisfied.
[WOAH LOOK AT THAT GEMS COUNT?]
[Man how I wish that were me]
[AAAA im all jelly now i wanna whale for Kaeya too! Shoo all other 4 stars all i want is Sir Kaeya!]
Silently praying to the RNG gods, Diluc clicks the x10 wish button for the first time that night and skips through everything with a weapon silhouette. This is going to take a long time, isn't it, he thinks.
The thing with aiming for a 4 star as rare as Kaeya is he can't just wait for the golden light to appear for him to celebrate. Every 10 pull gives him a chance to get a Kaeya constellation, and like hell is he going to pass the chance to enjoy seeing Kaeya's sprite, so he can't just skip everything.
To distract himself from how much clicking and skipping he has to do, he reads through the constantly rolling chatbox to interact with his viewers.
[Ah Kaeya is so shy he hasnt come home yet?]
[If Darknight doesnt get c6 Kaeya no one else deserves to get a c6 Kaeya]
That comment makes Diluc pause skipping the weapons, staring intently at the chatbox. It's oddly sweet but he's not really sure whether he's going to laugh at that or not, so he keeps his mouth shut about that comment and decides to respond to the other much more harmless comments.
More than a hundred pulls later, Diluc feels a heavy feeling in his chest, his hand hesitating to click the x10 wish button. He's probably almost at 200 pulls and has hit the 5-star pity quite a few times, luckier than he usually is. But that's not really the luck he needs; he wants Kaeya's second constellation. There's no other way to do that, so he willfully clicks on the wish button. The usual purple falling star animation flashes through his screen, and the first thing that shows up on his screen is a character's silhouette.
It's Kaeya's wish sprite in all its glory, gracing the screen with his arrival.
Diluc feels the world stop, his eyes trained on his screen. He couldn't resist the surprised gasp that leaves his lips, his chest heaving a pleased sigh of relief at finally getting his first gacha obtained Kaeya constellation. If he were a streamer who has his camera turned on, all his current viewers would have seen the prettiest, most contented smile they've ever seen, a smile that could rival the warmth of the sun.
"He's home..."
The chatbox pings noisily, the stream of new messages easily flooding all the previous ones.
Diluc chuckles lightly, and it's heard through his mic, the chatbox flooding even faster.
With Diluc being entirely lost in his own little world as he enjoys the bliss of his constellation 2 Kaeya, he never notices his husband, Kaeya, entering the room through his slightly ajar door. Kaeya enters the room in perfect timing, just the exact moment when the Cavalry Captain's wish animation showed up on the screen. Kaeya can't see Diluc's face right now since the back of Diluc's fancy gaming chair is facing him, but he can clearly imagine the brightest smile on his husband's face, a look of pure happiness that he wants to protect forever. And he will, for as long as he stays by his side. Kaeya decides to patiently wait for Diluc to get his constellation 6 Kaeya before making himself known, he wouldn't want to disrupt his husband's precious streaming moment at this time. He leans his back to the wall of Diluc's room, crossing his arms on his chest as he waits.
A few minutes pass, and Diluc still can't bring himself to click past Kaeya's constellation sprite. He's feeling too overwhelmed, in disbelief, and in relief, but mostly he's just grateful he now has Kaeya's powerful second constellation. But he has to move forward, he has a goal to achieve, and now that he knows he can get Kaeya's constellation, he's not about to stop here. He takes a quick screenshot of his pull, the endlessly pinging chatbox also captured in his screen and proceeds to continue pulling for Kaeya.
[Darknight SO LUCKY I WANT KAEYA C2 TOO!!]
[The guy has spent so much of course he has to get at least 1 cons come on]
[CONGRATS DARKNIGHT KAEYA LOVES U I KNOW YOULL GET UR C6 SOON! <3]
The next pulls are uneventful, but Diluc is now more responsive to the chats, probably because of his happy mood from getting his first Kaeya constellation during the stream.
[You have less than 300 pulls left do u think ull get c6 kaeya with that?]
Diluc smiles to himself at that particular comment.
"I said I won't stop pulling until I get constellation 6 Kaeya right? I'll stay true to that."
The chatbox scrolls so fast at that.
[YOOO DARKNIGHT LOADED AF FR SPARE ME SOME PLS]
[He is not the biggest kaeya simp for no reason!!!]
[GO DARKNIGHT GOOOO]
Diluc nods his head at the comments, it is indeed true that he's loaded, and it's all within his capacity to get his constellation 6 Kaeya. He's anything if not confident that his large sum of money can and will be able to bring all of Kaeya's constellations home.
Diluc's heart stops beating for a few seconds when his thoughts are interrupted when Kaeya's wish sprite appears on his screen again.
[DARKNIGHT FINALLY GETTING SOME LUCK C3 KAEYA LETS GO!]
Diluc's satisfied laugh goes through his mic, and his stream chatbox endlessly chimes once again.
"So we're at constellation 3 now huh? I guess Sir Kaeya is being a little generous now, isn't he?"
Diluc stops wishing, and checks his primogem count before he continues. He has enough for around 100 pulls more, and he's just at constellation 3 right now. He's not disheartened though and clicks on the x10 wish to resume his bring-home-c6-Kaeya wish session.
The rest of his pulls are uneventful, and Diluc starts eyeing his black card just in front of him. Just 10 more wishes before he has to purchase crystals again.
"Ah, so that's it for the 80,000 primogem pulls so far. Constellation 3 Kaeya doesn't seem so bad."
[Ngl it IS bad rng if u were really lucky u couldve alr gotten c6 by now]
Diluc feels himself pause a little at that comment, staring at it for a little while without responding.
[HEY OP DARKNIGHT STOPPED TALKING BC OF U]
[Thats not a nice thing to say on a stream chatbox its hurting all of us watching you know! TT]
Nonetheless, Diluc is amused by the comments filling up the chatbox.
"Who said I was bothered by my bad rng? I'll continue pulling after this last 10 pull, I'm not giving up on Kaeya."
Diluc quietly sighs to himself as he points his mouse towards the x10 wish button.
"Kaeya, come home to me...?"
And he clicks the x10 wish button. A purple falling star shows up on the screen, and the first thing that shows up is...
Another Kaeya constellation.
Diluc breathes in shakily in surprise, he totally did not expect this at all. But the smile on his face as he clicks through the weapons falls in open-mouthed surprise when he gets another Kaeya in the same 10 pull.
[WHAT GODLY LUCK 2 KAEYAS IN A 10 PULL AAAAA]
[WHAT?!]
[OMYGOD DARKNIGHT KAEYA LOVES U]
Diluc doesn't know what to say on stream. He's in complete and utter surprise as he stares in blank disbelief at getting 2 Kaeyas in a single 10 pull. That would mean he just needs one more Kaeya constellation to make Kaeya's constellations complete.
His hands are trembling lightly as he goes through the last of his pulls, the chatbox's pings resounding loudly, but he can't hear anything other than the sound of his heart ramming in his chest.
Another wish sprite shows on the screen.
It is Kaeya's final constellation.
Diluc immediately mutes his mic, resisting the urge to scream in pure happiness with the last of his willpower. He is stunned in his seat, praying to the Archons above how he managed to get all the luck in the world to get 3 Kaeya constellations in a 10 pull. He places his headphones gently beside his laptop, still in an utter state of shock and disbelief. He only remembers to breathe when he feels arms wrapping around him in a warm embrace, as soft lips plant a kiss on his temple.
"Did my sunshine have fun pulling for constellation 6 Kaeya?" Kaeya whispers quietly right beside his ear.
Diluc turns his head and his chair abruptly, and he looks wide-eyed up at Kaeya. "...how long have you been here?"
Kaeya chuckles in delight as he leans his face closer, "Since you pulled your first Kaeya constellation, my dear."
Diluc's jaw slightly opens as he tries to respond, "That long...?"
Kaeya just laughs again, "Seems like you enjoyed your gacha whaling session so much this time. I'm actually kind of jealous of Sir Kaeya."
"Coming from you? When you've sung endless praises when you got 2 Diluc constellations in one 10 pull, and you have constellation 6 Diluc in your character archive?" Diluc angrily retorts as he places his hands on his hips.
Kaeya gently runs his hand through Diluc's untied hair and holds Diluc's face to tilt it closer to him. "Now, now, don't get mad. I'm just saying," Kaeya pauses a bit when Diluc closes his eyes and nuzzles closer to his palm like a contented cat, "Congratulations on your full constellation Kaeya, my dear wife."
The endless pings from Diluc's chat stream ring to no end, but the two of them are so in each other's world that they never really notice. The chatbox is full of congratulations and envious remarks from other Kaeya stans wanting to have constellation 6 Kaeya. While Diluc is all distracted, Kaeya sneaks his hand to Diluc's mouse to tamper with the mute button and the camera, the ring on his hand glinting as he pulls Diluc closer to him to give him his congratulatory kiss.
Diluc just melts into Kaeya's kiss, chasing after those irresistable lips, not noticing that his mic is no longer on mute and the camera is turned on. Diluc grabs onto Kaeya's shirt, gasping and quietly asking for more as Kaeya's lips curl up the slightest at how adorable his dear wife is right now. If Kaeya knew earlier that getting the Cavalry Captain's constellations will make his dear wife this clingy, he would have suggested it sooner, he thinks. It's never too late to make the most out of it though, and he revels in his own sweet victory.
All of Darknight's viewers see a face (and kiss) reveal of Darknight and Darknight's husband for the first time, and it causes an uproar in the streaming community.
[Streamer Darknight is apparently married to fellow streamer Frostblade. Click the link for the steamy video footage!]