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The day started out normally enough.
It was a Sunday, the one free day the class of aspiring heroes had each week to relax, catch up on work, and take care of themselves before returning to the world of rigorous training and impossible pop quizzes.
Bakugou had woken up first, as usual, made himself breakfast, as usual, broken the coffee machine, which was not usual but no one was particularly surprised, and had woken everyone else up by screaming death threats at it until Kirishima came down to tell him that he could not, in fact, blow a coffee machine to smithereens and then eat its ashes as punishment for its malfunction.
Yep. A normal day.
Sundays usually began in chaos because of one classmate or another. Once, Todoroki had set the kitchen on fire trying to make toast. Another time, Mineta's screams of terror as Yaoyorozu and Jirou stuffed him in the dishwasher had doubled as everyone's alarm clock for the morning.
Kaminari proudly held the title of the most concerning wake up call in the history of Sundays, much to Kirishima's disappointment. The redhead couldn't exactly say his friend didn't deserve the title, though, because waking up to a screaming Kaminari running around the common room while being chased by a baby elephant of all things with the tv turned on to a news report about said elephant going missing from the zoo that morning was undoubtedly the best possible way to get up in the morning.
The students of Class 1-A spent these Sundays in various ways. Some people studied, some practiced honing their quirk and combat skills, some went out, some visited friends and family, some used it as an excuse not to study, but the most popular way to spend these lazy days was sprawled on the couch, tv on for background noise, as everyone talked and gossiped and laughed. It was a good stress reliever and an even better distraction from the crazy world of heroes and villains they had been thrust into.
It was Kaminari's favorite thing to do, and he looked forward to these bonding sessions every single week, which was how he'd gotten into his current predicament, head resting on Kirishima's lap while his feet were crossed over Sero's as he and his classmates flitted through tv channels with bored amusement, trying to either find something good to watch or a station that would suffice as mere background noise for their conversations.
And then they found the news broadcast.
Unlike the rest of the channels, Todoroki didn't simply click by this one. News channels were a good mix of boring reports and exciting stories, making for either an entertaining watch or a perfect station to leave on as the students talked amongst themselves. From the looks of it, this particular newscaster was just about to start her report.
Everyone watched as her face broke into a wide smile.
"Welcome, everyone, to another edition of Teenage Heartthrobs!"
"Ugh, this hag again?" Bakugou propped his feet up on the pile of magazines and DVDs lying around. "This show's dumb. Turn it off."
"Do not disrespect news reporters, Bakugou!" Iida sat ramrod straight, making Uraraka beside him jump in surprise. "It is impolite and immature, not to mention improper."
Bakugou rolled his eyes, making no move to shift his position. "News reporter my ass. Her name's Jilan Hamato. She's a teenage American reporter, and my witch of a mother is freaking obsessed with her. This show is just about celebrity gossip and shit, and it's fucking stupid." He glared at Todoroki. "Turn it off, Half 'n Half."
"I dunno, it sounds kinda interesting." Tsuyu put a finger to her lips, ignoring the growl sent her way with practiced ease. "I say we keep watching!"
Kirishima groaned, letting his head fall back against the head of the sofa. "Do we have to? This kinda only sounds like it's for girls."
Mina rolled her eyes. "Oh please. I'm sure your manliness can take watching five minutes of a tv show." She waved away the redhead's strangled cry. "Now shush up. It's starting."
Jilan flashed the camera a bright grin, all of the girls and at least half of the boys watching the program intently. Kaminari just sighed and tucked his hands behind his head, letting his eyes slide closed. Knowing Mina and the rest of the girls, if they got hooked on something, everyone else would have to watch it for a lot longer than just five minutes.
Kaminari just shrugged, shifting himself a bit to get into a more comfortable position and ready to relax and unwind.
That was, until Jilan started speaking.
Jilan's voice was loud and peppy, exactly as a gossip reporter's should be. "Now, on today's edition of 'Teenage Heartthrobs,' we're going to be analyzing one of the most gorgeous professional hotties in the fashion industry today. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, the man who caused a global sexuality crisis, won the hearts of millions, and was proclaimed the most attractive celeb alive by the citizens of America at only sixteen years of age, DENKI KAMINARI!"
His eyes snapped open.
Excuse me, what the fuck.
Kaminari shot straight up, causing Kirishima to yelp at the sudden movement and narrowly avoid the blond head of hair rocketing towards his face. His shocked expression quickly morphed into one of horror as Jilan pulled up one of his many headshots, flashing it proudly at the camera as the studio audience clapped and whistled in response.
Kaminari could feel nineteen pairs of eyes boring into his skull, but he couldn't find it in himself to care. His eyes were glued to the screen, watching in mute horror as Jilan pulled up snapshot after snapshot of the golden-haired boy.
"I'm sorry, folks, but can we take a second to admire how pretty this boy is? I mean, COME ON! God sure took his time on this one. Like, leave some good looks for the rest of us!" The audience laughed, shouting their agreements all across the studio.
"Let's take a moment to examine how perfect he is, okay?" And to Kaminari's horror, Jilan pulled up a freaking diagram of one of his full body snapshots ohmygod he wanted to die. A few giggles spread around the studio, the audience seemingly amused by how much Jilan had prepared.
"First off, this boy is pure gold. I'm not even exaggerating when I say that he is the most beautiful human being I've ever seen in my life. I mean, those eyes with that hair and flawless skin? Do NOT even get me started. His lightning bolt? ICONIC. His style? ICONIC." She paused for a moment, allowing the audience a few seconds to clap in agreement. "And GUYS. He. Has. FRECKLES." Jilan fake swooned. "Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?"
Kaminari buried his face in his hands. He wasn't uncomfortable since he'd had more than a few talk-show hosts gush about his looks, but they had all been in America, not in his home country where all of his friends could see and understand it!
"And moving onto his body." Jilan clicked her tongue. "Just looking at him I can already tell that he'll become a sex GOD when he's older!"
Shinsou choked on his Fanta. Kaminari nearly died of embarrassment.
"I mean, he's literally wearing a t-shirt in this picture, and I can STILL see how perfectly he's built. Long legs, slender waist, muscly arms, perfect hands, a sharp jawline, and a babyface? I swear, it's a miracle anyone in his mere presence can contain themselves. I would be a nervous wreck! If his beautiful golden eyes so much as landed on me, I think I'd die on the spot!"
She smiled brightly, promptly removing the diagrams from the big screen. "Let's get the opinion of the audience, shall we?" She pulled up a picture of Kaminari modeling an expensive suit, eyebrow raised seductively with and smirk plastered on his face. Kaminari groaned. Jesus Christ, he wanted to die. "Tell me, folks? Is this not the most gorgeous sixteen-year-old you've ever seen?"
The crowd erupted into a series of whoops and cheers offscreen, making Jilan nod in agreement.
"I thought so." She smirked. "Also, for all who didn't know, our resident hottie is bisexual. Better watch out ladies, now you have two times more competition!"
Kaminari could feel Shinsou bristle beside him, making the blond smile slightly before hiding his head in his hands again as Jilan went on another rant about how astoundingly beautiful he was.
"As most of you probably know, Kaminari's now enrolled in Japan's UA high school for aspiring heroes. I mean, he's heroic and the hottest thing on this side of the equator? Talk about perfect, not to mention the snapshots of his newly modified hero costume." Jilan pulled up another photo, one that Kaminari was sure hadn't been released to the public but decided it was better not to dwell on the fact. "Guys. He has a CHOKER. This is NOT a drill, and let me tell you, it is DOING things to me."
The audience offered whoops and whistled of agreement. Kaminari seriously considered asking Bakugou to blow him up.
To make matters worse, Jilan showed no sign of letting up any time soon.
"It's no wonder this teenager took America by storm, am I right? When I first saw his picture on a billboard, I thought to myself, 'this boy can't be real. He's got to be photoshopped.' But guess what, everyone? I've had the pleasure of seeing him in person, and he's ALL NATURAL. I MEAN, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? IT'S PRACTICALLY UNFAIR AT THIS POINT!" Jilan received thunderous applauses of agreement. He smiled blindingly, and Kaminari started to seriously consider throwing himself out of the nearest window. "And lemme tell you, Kami-boy isn't just your run-of-the-mill plastic celebrity. I've been informed, by my multiple sources, that this guy is the funniest dude you'll ever meet."
Jilan snapped her fingers, and a photo of him dancing at karaoke night in the dorm appeared on the big screen. Kaminari didn't even have time to wonder how'd she'd gotten her hands on that picture before she launched into another raving rant.
"Do you see this? He almost looks like a regular teenager, excluding the dashingly gorgeous looks and flawless skin obviously." A few whoops of agreement could be heard offscreen. "This fallen angel has personality, everyone, which is something scarce in celebrities these days. And not only that, but I've heard he's humble too? Humble? I can't even process how someone could possibly be humble while walking around like that all day." Jilan whistled and fanned herself with her hand. The audience laughed. "I mean, that body? That smile? The hair? Those piercing eyes? Goddamn, I don't know how his classmates function!"
The audience cheered in agreement, and Jilan offered another blinding smile as she went onto the next slide, and...oh.
A picture of Kaminari sitting back in a chair in a sleek black crop top and booty short popped up on the screen, his hair tied up in a messy man bun and cheeks and eyes adorning golden glitter and a rather impressive smoky makeup look.
The offscreen audience (and the common room) went wild.
"Do you guys see this?" Jilan yelled over the screams of delight. "This is why he won the sexiest celebrity alive. This man is ethereal, I tell you! Ethereal. Do you know what I would give to be saved by him? Everything, people, ohmygod-"
The screen switched off as Todoroki accidentally sat on the power button.
The room was quiet for a few seconds.
"Excuse me, um, what the actual fuck."
Kaminari grimaced at Bakugou's words. "Language," He muttered.
"You're a professional model?" Kirishima was staring at him with wide, wide eyes. "And you won the title of most attractive celebrity in America? And you didn't tell me?"
"Uh," Kaminari scratched the back of his head. "Sorry. I mean like...it's kinda awkward-"
"Awkward? I think that's awesome!" Midoriya cried, springing up in his seat. "You're a professional model, Kaminari. That's amazing! You should've told us!"
"I was goooing to." The blond groaned, slumping back in his seat. "I just didn't want you guys to find out like this."
"Hmm." Uraraka cleared his throat and raised her hand. "I would just like to say that I, for one, totally saw this coming."
"You did not!"
"I did too!" Uraraka glared at Mina from across the room. "I'm not blind, Ashido. Everyone that reporter lady was pretty spot on. Like, I'm in a relationship and everything, but if Kaminari ever asked me out, I'd break up with my girlfriend on the spot." She offered Tsuyu an apologetic smile. "No offense, Asui."
The girl in question shrugged. "Eh. Relatable. The second Kaminari asks me out, I'm dumping your ass."
"Fair enough."
"Uh, are you guys forgetting the fact that he's taken?" Shinsou gestured violently to himself, accidentally knocking over a bowl of chips in the process. "Do I just not exist anymore or something?"
"Kaminari was actually my bi awakening," Todoroki commented calmly, completely ignoring Kaminari's flustered sputtering. "No kidding. I walked into homeroom for the first time, I saw him and thought he was smoking hot, and suddenly realized I liked dicks."
"Same." That was Midoriya.
"Same." That was Sero.
"Same. That was Tokoyami.
"I already knew I was a raging homosexual, but Kaminari just further cemented that fact." That was Aoyama, unsurprisingly.
"Uh, this is all news to me-" Kaminari's cheeks were flaming red, but no one was paying attention to him, all instead suddenly taking the opportunity to bond over their mutual man-crush on Kaminari.
"Dude, did you see that cat-eye look on him?"
"The man bun? Holy fuck, we should get him to wear that around the dorm more."
"His hair is silky soft though, Jilan was right about that."
"Honestly, Kaminari's just super pretty."
"Of course he is. He's a pretty guy."
"I'm not surprised he's a model. Has he looked in a mirror lately?"
"Same."
"Same."
"Same."
"Same."
"He can literally cut someone with his jawline, holy shi-"
"What a bunch of fucking weirdos," Shinsou muttered, rolling his eyes as the rest of Class 1-A struggled to talk over each other. He cast a side-long glance over in Kaminari's direction, which only happened to be a few feet away. He slinked over, slung an arm around his shoulder, and pulled him onto the nearest couch. "You know, you were actually my gay awakening too."
"Really?" Kaminari turned to face him. "When did you realize?"
"As soon as you asked me out."
"...seriously...?"
"Yeah. I was all about lady parts until some gorgeous blond boy I had never seen before told me I was cute and asked if I wanted to go on a date."
"Are you for real right now?"
Shinsou snorted. "Are you really surprised? According to that reporter lady, you caused a nation-wide sexuality crisis." He scanned him up and down. "Which is, like, totally understandable by the way."
Kaminari huffed and pushed him off. "All of you are such fucking idiots."
"Hey! Kaminari!" Kirishima waved him over from across the room. "Can you do, like, the hair flippy thingie that models do? Where they push their hair back and strike a sexy pose?"
Kaminari blinked. "Uhm. Why?"
Kirishima gave him a shit-eating grin. "I wanna see if you could potentially be Bakugou's gay awakening! Last time I checked, he had autocaps off on his phone!"
Kaminari pinched the bridge of his nose. "Just because someone types in all lowercase doesn't mean they're gay, dumbass!"
"Just try! I wanna see!"
"...such fucking idiots."