Work Text:
You shifted in your chair, readjusting your position before staring back at the bright computer screen.
The little clock in the corner read 3 am; you were more than ready to leave S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters behind and finally find peace under the covers of your waiting bed. That level of exhaustion wasn’t new to you - drudging his agents to death by over-exhaustion seemed to be Fury’s favorite pastime. Right after yelling at them to improve morale.
You had just finished another page of your, admittedly very overdue, report when your computer decided that he too was too tired for this shit. A window popped up, first one, then two - then four more, as random software, bookmarked websites and various files randomly flashed over on your screen. Slowly you removed your hands from the keyboard, checking if some random key had caused the still flashing mob of apps on your screen. They did not stop - if anything, the random opening, closing and movement of windows became even more frantic. At this speed, the computer would crash in no time and there was no chance of finishing the report today - or even this week. You grabbed your mouse, using the opportunity of a split-second without new pop-ups to access a repair-software - that bricked your computer completely.
Everything froze, the mouse refused to move even an inch - before a bright red screen flashed in front of everything else.
“Unauthorized Access.”
“What in heaven and hell…” Then all windows closed - a short moment of relief, that did not last nearly long enough - and a video started loading. You squinted, fixating the little turning circle in utter confusion. Who was stupid enough to hack into S.H.I.E.L.D. servers? There was an entire floor of IT-Buffs somewhere in this building just waiting to rip anyone apart, who dared poking their little toe in their domain. … well, there was one person coming to mind. And your suspicion was confirmed immediately, when the video finally started playing. Your heart skipped a beat. You tried to turn off the desktop - no luck, it turned back on right away. With a quick yank, you pulled the cord, turning the speaker nob to 0 right after. Your pulse still wildly alleviated, you pulled out your cellphone.
*(Y/N) [Admin] opened the Chatroom*
*(Y/N) invited (Tony) to the Chat*
*(Tony) joined the Chat*
(Tony): Hello, beauty. Still awake, dear? ;)
(Y/N): STARK! WTF? STOP HACKING MY COMPUTER!
(Tony): Wow, easy there girl~ Why am I always your first suspect? As if I’d ever inconvenience you!
(Y/N): Oh, of course not, pardon my bad. I’ll go ahead and call the other computer-genius that continues being a pain in my ass…oh wait; THERE IS NONE. NOW STOP IT. IF FURY ENTERS MY OFFICE AND SEES THAT I´M WATCHING PORN INSTEAD OF WRITING MY REPORT I CAN GO AND LOOK FOR A NEW JOB!!!
(Tony): It’s not my fault if you watch porn instead of working (N/N). Maybe you should focus on your work, honey?
(Y/N): Stark, it’s 3am. I´m tired, angry and I need to finish this goddamn report so STOP IT!
(Tony): Well, how could I ever refuse to help a lady in difficulty? I think the word I was looking for is: No. ;)
(Y/N): At least you admit it, Stark. Now be an adult and make it STOP.
(Tony): Convince me. ;x
*(Y/N) [Admin] invited (Natasha) to the Chat*
*(Natasha) joined the Chat*
(Y/N): Morning, Nat! <3 Sorry for the disturbance at such a time, but could you please `convince´ Stark to stop hacking my computer? Thank you!
(Natasha): What has he done this time?
(Tony): I just tried to give her a break! She’s been sitting on this report for hours!
(Y/N): Yes STARK; THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY HAVE TO WORK WHEN AT WORK.
(Natasha): You are a pain in the ass, Stark. Now stop bothering (N/N). Or I’ll make you.
(Tony): She needed a break. I just gave her some distraction. ;)
*(Tony) changed their name to (Scrapman)*
(Scrapman): Hey! That’s impolite! I guess you aren’t ‘distracted’ enough yet…
(Y/N): Stark, I don´t know what you intend to do. And I honestly would rather NOT find out.
*(Y/N) [Admin] appointed (Scrapman) to Admin-State*
(Y/N): DID YOU JUST HACK MY MOBILE!?!
*(Scrapman) [Admin] changed their name to (Tony)*
*(Tony) [Admin] invited (Bruce) to the Chat*
*(Tony) [Admin] invited (Clint) to the Chat*
*(Tony) [Admin] invited (Thor) to the Chat*
*(Bruce) joined the Chat*
*(Tony) [Admin] invited (Steve) to the Chat*
*(Clint) joined the Chat*
(Clint): Good morning! :3
(Y/N): TONY, THE VERY MOMENT I LEAVE MY OFFICE I WILL MURDER YOU. Good morning, Clint ^^
(Tony): The more, the merrier ;)
(Bruce): Tony, what have you done to her this time?
(Y/N): He hacked my computer while I was writing an important report and now it´s playing pg. 18+ videos and I had to unplug my fucking screen to get it to stop! Then he hacked my mobile to make himself an admin. >.<
(Clint): Irremovable porn? Haha, nice one, Stark! :D
(Y/N): THAT’S NOT FUNNY KATNISS.
(Clint): It is. Sorry, (N/N). ^^”
*(Thor) joined the Chat*
(Thor): GOOD MORNING, FRIENDS! THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME TO YOUR CONFERENCE!
(Y/N): Since when does Thor have a mobile? O.o
(Thor): GOOD MORNING LADY (Y/N)! BROTHER ANTHONY MADE ONE OF THESE DEVICES FOR ME!
(Tony): Yeah, yeah, stop using capitals, point break.
(Thor): My apologies, Brother Anthony. Your interfaces are rather tiny compared to Asgardian devices.
*(Steve) joined the Chat*
(Steve): Good morning. What happened, Stark? It must be something important when you message us all in the middle of the night? Another alien thing?
(Y/N): Morning Cap <3 I’m very sorry it really isn’t. Tony just decided to be an ass.
(Tony): Why does Capsicle get a heart? I didn’t even get a hello! :’(
(Y/N): Because he didn’t hack my computer AT GODDAMN THREE IN THE MORNING STARK. I WANT TO FINISH MY WORK AND DRIVE HOME AND GO TO BED.
(Tony): Oh, we can arrange the going to bed part, sweetheart. ;)
(Bruce): To sum it up, Tony: You just called us all in the middle of the night because you want to annoy (Y/N)? Great idea.
(Tony): Hey, science bud! I´m just trying to give her some entertaining distraction!
(Steve): Appears to me, she’s not really happy about that. So maybe not your best work.
(Clint): Oh, that’s just because you don’t know what exactly he did ;)
(Tony): Thanks Legolas! At least someone is appreciating my effort!
(Clint): Stop calling me that, Scrapman! -.-
(Tony): Who told you that name!?!
(Natasha): Ah, I suppose you preferred, Tinman?
(Thor): I suppose that’s not meant in a friendly, brotherly-teasing way?
(Clint): Ah, never mind Thor. He likes that ;)
(Tony): Go away and shoot some arrows at a tree, Robin! -.-
(Steve): (Y/N), is everything alright? You are alarmingly calm?
(Bruce): (Y/N)???
(Thor): Lady (Y/N)? DID SOMETHING HAPPEN TO YOU? IS MY BROTHER INVOLVED AGAIN?!
(Clint): (N/N)? ;A;
(Natasha): I guess she logged out and went off to hunt down Stark…
(Tony): OH SHIT.
(Bruce): WHAT DID YOU DO!?
(Tony): …maybe I accidentally hit the wrong key… and turned off the PC. Not sure if she saved that report…
(Steve): It was nice to make your acquaintance Stark.
(Thor): Faire well Brother Anthony. It was an honor to fight by your side.
(Natasha): I’ll help you this one time, Stark. Where are you?
(Tony): THANKS. Stark-Tower; last floor. Behind the Kitchen-counter.
(Y/N): Thanks Nat <3
*(Y/N) [Admin] left the chat*
(Tony): WHAT DID YOU JUST DO, WIDDOW!!!
(Natasha): Have fun, Stark ;)
*(Natasha) left the chat*
(Thor): You shall find a warm place in Walhalla, Brother Anthony.
*(Thor) left the chat*
*(Steve) left the chat*
(Tony): NO, WAIT! HELP ME! DON´T LEAVE ME ALONE!
(Clint): Nighty night, Stark ;)
*(Clint) left the chat*
(Tony): SCIENCE BUD!
*(Bruce) left the chat*
*(Tony) [Admin] changed their name to (AlmostDeceased)*
*(AlmostDeceased) [Admin] closed the Chatroom*