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It’s cold when she opens her eyes. Cold and dark, like always. She notices her window is open, the wind softly moving her curtains and a light shiver runs over her. She doesn’t remember leaving the window open but then again she does a lot of things she doesn’t remember at night. It comes with her powers, at least she thinks it does. She puts her blankets back, then moves out of her bed to close her window and looks out into the night for a bit, watching the moon high on the sky, when she hears movement behind her and turns around.
And there she is, again. Just like she’d been before, alive and breathing, sitting on her bed cross-leged. Her brown hair falls softly around her shoulders and she’s smiling. She’s beautiful as ever.
"Allison", Lydia says and she doesn’t know why she sounds so surprised.
It’s not the first time that she finds Allison in her room, she’s here a lot actually and Lydia thinks that maybe for once her banshee powers are good for something. Allison should be dead, she died and Lydia felt it herself but still, here she is, smiling at her.
"Hey Lydia. Can’t sleep again?", Allison asks, her voice worried.
Lydia sighs and shakes her head. “I keep thinking of you. I can’t forget about what happened.”, she says.
Allison pats on the spot next to her on the bed, gesturing for Lydia to sit next to her and the redhead goes to sit down, shoulders handing low.
"I miss you so much, Allison. We all do.", Lydia whispers, eyes watering. It’s hard like this, when Allison comes up in her dreams every night and then actually appears in her room when she wakes up. Sometimes she forgets her best friend is dead and she still looks around for her in school.
And she’s not the only one, she knows it.Scott sometimes says that he has to tell something to Allison before he remembers that he can’t tell her anything anymore. Stiles still talks about going over to ask Allison about something mythology-related and his eyes go sad and tired when he realizes that no, he won’t ask her anything ever again. She can’t say anything about Isaac, except that he sounds sad over the telephone and looks horrible when they sometimes Skype. Although they haven’t really been friends before Lydia had thought it would be important to keep track on him, he loved Allison after all, just like they all had.
"I miss you too, Lydia. I miss all of you.", Allison says and puts her hand on Lydia’s. "But we can’t change what happened. And you can’t keep doing this…"
"Doing what?", Lydia asks and gives at Allison with questioning look.
"You can’t keep bringing me back like this. You can’t keep whishing for me to come back. I can’t come here all the time.", the dark haired girl explains and Lydia looks at her, confused.
"I am not…Allison, I am not doing anything. You just…you just show up and…" Lydia stops in the middle of her sentence because maybe Allison is right? Up until now she’s thought that it’s her powers that make it possible for Allison to reach out to her but maybe it isn’t really Allison that comes to her but Lydia calling out for Allison and the brunette just following her call.
"You are not letting me go. You are holding me here, Lydia. And you can’t do that. I can’t do that. I can’t stay here. I have to go.”, Allison says, her voice sounds pained and sad.
"But…I don’t understand. I just wanted you to be here. I wanted you to come back and stay." A single tear runs down Lydia’s cheek and Allison puts out her thumbs to wipe it up. "I want you to stay, Allison. Please stay."
Allison shakes her head sadly. “You know I can’t do that. Think about it, we read about it together, remember? If you keep dead things in the world of the living horrible things can happen. I don’t want that to happen and I know you don’t want that either. Please, just think about it, do you want the next thing you have to hunt to be me?”
A sob wretches Lydia’s body, she’s shaking all over and the tears are pouring from her eyes. Allison puts her hand on Lydia’s shoulder, pulls her in closer.
"It hurts so much, Allison. And it’s so unfair. There’s still so much you have to see and do and…it’s just not fair. You shouldn’t have to go.", Lydia cries.
"Yes, I do.", Allison answers, tears shining in her eyes as well but she swallows them down. "And it’s okay. I am fine. I had a lot of time to think about it, you know? It’s okay. I died in Scott’s arms, with my friends and my family around. And I see how much I am missed around here, I know I’ve been loved and that’s all I need. It’s all I want."
Allison stands up and opens her arms for Lydia. “Come here.”, she says and Lydia walks into her embrace. Allison still smells like herself, still feels like herself and everything feels so familiar and right and perfect. But she understands now, sees what Allison means. She knows what can happen if she keeps the dead in the world of the living for too long and she fears the outcome of this if she doesn’t let go now.
"Close your eyes, Lydia.", Allison says as she moves out of their hugs and takes a step back. "And let go."
Lydia closes her eyes, relaxes her body and tries to make her mind let go. She tries to give up her hold on Allison, tries to give her free.
"It’s so hard.", she whispers.
"Just let me go, Lydia. It’s time."
Allison’s voice is getting more quiet, she feels her presence vanishing bit by bit, the air around her is getting colder until she just knows that something has changed.
She opens her eyes and Allison is gone.
More tears run down her cheeks as she forces herself to smile a bit.
"Goodbye, Allison.", she whispers into the silence and she doesn’t know if it’s just her imagination but she could swear she hears Allison’s voice telling her goodbye as well.