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- a hoarse whisper “kiss me”
Deceit felt a giddiness bubble up inside him as he slunk through the shadows of the Mind Palace, making his way towards Logan’s room.
The two aspects had been spending quite a deal of time together over the last month. It had been Logic who proposed their interaction to begin with, having wanted to study Deceit’s lies and its effectiveness in the right circumstance. He had been quite surprised, though naturally he hid it, when the idea had first been brought to him. As he knew that Logan was more on the front of honesty for knowledge was power or important or whatever.
But he couldn’t deny that the idea held merritt. Especially as he didn’t have that many people willingly wanting to spend time with him or talk with him. The other ‘dark’ sides -as that pesky Roman liked to call them all- didn’t particularly like him. Virgil wasn’t really his friend anymore (at least he didn’t think so) and the other Lights avoided him. Well Patton would say hello and give him cookies, but that was it.
So he accepted Logan’s proposal. Not that he was lonely or anything. He was fine with how he spent most of his time by himself. It was just boring sometimes, that was all. And it gave him a chance to get to know Logan in return. For… totally-not-important reasons.
If Deceit was honest with himself -heh- he would admit he found himself greatly admiring the logical aspect. He was intelligent and observant, able to detect the snake’s tricks easily enough. Sometimes it took him a little longer to figure it out, but he was never one to be duped for long. It should have infuriated him, but he actually enjoyed it. That no matter what, Logan was able to realize it was him. That he was learning and understanding Deceit so well as to know when he was playing a little trick.
That he encouraged him to have Thomas give little white or grey lies to assist in being able to get more time for projects.
Arriving to Logan’s room, he slithered inside. He never bothered to knock. Logan used to find it irritating but as time went by he seemed to stop being bothered by it and merely accepted that that was how the other would enter. “My what a terrible day.” he said in way of greeting. It was in fact a wonderful day.
“Salutations Deceit.” came Logan’s reply, always so proper and sophisticated. But there was a hint of a smile! Deceit didn’t care or anything, but it was a nice look on the other. The lying aspect took his usual place in the extra chair Logan kept by his desk just for him. It certainly didn’t make him feel warm or special or anything.
“Ssso what’sss on today’sss agenda?” he inquired, letting out soft hisses with every s. In the beginning he didn’t do that, tried to keep that little tick to himself. But he had grown comfortable in Logan’s presence. How strange it was that he had achieved such ease by someone who wanted to use him for data. But surely by now they were closer than that. He couldn’t be the only one that felt their closeness.
“I would like to compare what your lies appear like compared to when you’re telling the truth.” Logan explained, his posture calm but professional. The statement caused Deceit to lift an eyebrow, curiosity filling up inside him.
“Oh? And how will you know the difference?” he asked, folding his hands together in a similar manner of a maniacal villain. “A lie detector tessst?”
“In a manner of speaking.” Logan adjusted his glasses and sat in a way that allowed him to fully view Deceit. “Polygraphs are not reliable enough for accurate testing. It is far too easy to tamper with the data.” A clipboard and pen were summoned into Logan’s hands. “So I will use the method of reading body language.”
Oh.
Logan was going to watch his whole body, or maybe just his face, to study his honesty. Somehow that knowledge caused a fluttery feeling to form in his stomach and heat to rise to his cheeks. It took everything in him not to squirm. “How drawl.” he breathed out before clearing his throat. Logan scribbled something down before looking back up at him.
“Let’s start with a simple falsehood and then move onto a truth.” he stated. Not asked, never asked. He merely told Deceit what to do when they did these little experiments. He didn’t mind though.
“I hate you.” The lie fell easily from his lips, a smirk on his face as his eyes gleamed with mischief. He lifted up a gloved hand and pretended to inspect the nails he couldn’t even see. “I honestly don’t know why I put up with you.” It was a long moment of Logan staring intently at him, studying him, before the logical being finally looked away to write down his findings. Deceit’s heart pounded the entire time -assuming he had a heart, being part of Thomas’ mind and all- and he wondered if Logan would pay attention to the truth behind his words. He already knew what he said was a lie, so would he know what he truly meant?
If he did, he made no sign of showing it. Which was… fine. It was fine. It wasn’t a big deal or anything. He didn’t care.
“Now a truth.” Deceit bit his lip as he debated on that. He could go for something simple, like the sky is blue. Of course that wasn’t really true. Blue came from the way the air molecules reflected in the light When it was gone, the sky was black as the void of space. And then of course you had overcast days that made everything grey. Perhaps… since maybe Logan didn’t pay attention to his lie’s meaning, perhaps he could honestly tell him?
The idea was nerve wracking but… they were close. And Deceit wanted him to know. Wanted to share that vulnerable piece with him.
“I..” he hesitated, biting his lip. Taking a deep breath, he placed his hands into his lap. “I really like you Logan.” he said softly, cheeks warming. He wanted to scratch at his scales. Silence once again filled the room and this time he really did squirm.
“Fascinating.” Logan finally said, looking down to write his findings. “People typically show signs of discomfort when lying but you seem to operate the opposite. More confident with your deception and a great dislike for honesty.” Deceit kept quiet, his mismatched eyes watching Logan closely. Looking for… something. Was that all he had to say? Did he not have any kind of reaction to the words themselves? Did he feel the same? Did he not?
“Well I am Deceit.” he finally said, choosing to not bring the subject up at all. “I’m sssssuppossssed to be.” Maybe it was for the best he didn’t call attention. Maybe Logan didn’t get just what he meant. Maybe he just thought he meant he liked Logan as a friend. Maybe he didn’t want to say anything because they were friends and didn’t want to ruin that. That was ok, Deceit could handle either of those outcomes. He liked being Logan’s friend.
It was fine.
The test went on for a little longer, a few more examples of lies and truths given before Logan had him change things up so he could guess. It had been fun. And Logan even managed to get things wrong some of the time, which was always a sight to see. Deceit left the other’s room afterwards, pleased as could be. He didn’t hold any melancholy over his feelings ignored for data retrieval. He knew that was important to Logan. It was fine.
He scurried through the shadows hours later, heading to the kitchen for a innocent snack. He didn’t miss out on any meal time, no. Just wanted a snack. As he grew closer to his destination however, he heard voices. He stopped in his tracks and moved further into the darkness, listening carefully. He could hear both Patton and Roman conversing, but there was a third as well. He couldn’t tell who yet, he just knew the other two were talking to the third individual.
“So how’s it going with Deceit?” Patton asked, and the lying aspect realized the other had to have been Logan. The snake found himself smiling, pleased to know Logan talked about him with the others. He must have told them about the studies. About how they were friends. Maybe he talked about any possible feelings-
“He is a very fascinating test subject.”
Deceit felt something plummet in his gut. Test subject? Was that all he was to the other? A mesely test subject? He knew that was perhaps how it started off as, but didn’t all the time they spent together mean anything? Was he the only one that felt that had grown close? Did his feelings mean nothing to the logical being? Despair began to creep its way into the snake’s heart, but that despair stood back as anger barreled its way passed.
Without thinking at all, Deceit stormed into the kitchen with bared teeth. Like a viper ready to strike. “Oh issss that all I am?” he hissed out, eyes glaring with so much heat he was surprised he wasn’t setting anything on fire. Logan and the others jumped at his sudden appearance, eyes widened by surprised. But he honestly couldn't care less. “How foolissh of me.”
“Deceit what are you on abou-” Logan began to say, brows furrowed in clear confusion. Deceit didn’t care though.
“Oh you know,” he began, cutting the other off. “I wasss jussst meaning how I had thought we had grown passsed all that. That you actually enjoyed my company. But clearly I was misssstaken. Really I sshould have known better. After all, you’re ssssooo much better than me, aren’t you?” He scoffed. “You ‘Light’ ssssidessss are alwaysss sooo much better.” Emotions beyond anger started to bubble in his throat and Deceit’s eyes felt a burning sensation. “You only ever want me when you need me for sssomething! I knew that. I wasss ok with that. I really sshould have known better.”
A bitter laugh left his lips. “Did you have to be sssooo nice to me though?” he asked, no demanded. “If you had no intenssionsss of sssseeing me beyond sssssomething usssseful then you could have done a better job at keeping that clear.” His throat felt tight, like something was clogged in it. “Or maybe I’m just sssstupid.” Something wet slid down his cheek and he felt his entire body freeze. Oh god no!
“Deceit-” Logan began, still looking bewildered as he reached out to touch him.
“IT’SSSS FINE!” He snapped, lashing his hand out to slap the oncoming one away. “I’M FINE! THISSSS ISSS TOTALLY FINE!” he screamed out, eyes squeezing shut to stop any other tears. “IT’SSSS FINE THAT YOU SSSSSEE ME THAT WAY! I’M FINE WITH YOU NOT CARING ABOUT ME. OR MY FEELINGSSSSS. YOU NEVER DID, WHY SSSTART NOW? I WASSSSS JUSSSSST DELUDING MYSSSELF RIGHT? I MISSSTOOK WHAT THISSSS HAD BECOME. I THOUGHT IT CHANGED WHEN IT SSSTAYED THE SSSAAAME. IT’SSSS MY FAULT I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU-” The screaming came to an abrupt end as he realized what he said. Eyes snapped opened wide to see the shocked faces of the others. Forming his fiercest scowl, he squared himself up. “It’s fine.” he growled out and slunk down.
He didn’t know how long he spent crying alone in his room, buried in his bedding as if to shield him from the world. It had to have been a while, as his throat became scratchy and irritated while his eyes felt puffy and his face itchy. At some point he wasn’t sure if he was even crying any more tears or if they had all dried out. Sobs still wrecked his body though, so it didn’t matter one way or another.
A knock sounded on his door, soft and hesitant. He didn’t know why anyone would come bothering him, especially since he was in a mood. Whoever it was, he didn’t want to deal with them. “COME IN.” he yelled out, voice strained and hoarse. Of course he meant the opposite and anyone with any brain cells would know that.
Apparently Logan oddly enough did not have any.
The moment he heard his door open, Deceit had lifted his head up to snap at whoever had been dumb enough to actually come in. But upon seeing Logan he just froze. “What do you want?” he eventually got out, wincing at the way he sounded. Logan looked out of place in the lying aspect’s space.
“I had come to... apologize.” the other admitted, looking sheepish as he spoke. Deceit sniffed and buried back into his covers.
“Whatever for?” he asked, trying to sound as if he wasn’t affected at all. Unfortunately his voice gave him away. He pretended otherwise. “You did nothing wrong. Go away now.”
“Falsehood.” Deceit nearly let out a snort at the other’s trademark way of calling him out on his lies. “It has come to my attention that I have been… neglectful of your feelings.” That was an understatement. “And have not been a good companion.”
“We’re not companionsss. I’m jusst a tessst sssssubject.” he muffled hissed out, and he was unable to hold back how morose he felt over that.
“Falsehood.” That got his attention. Slowly Deceit peeked out of his blankets and watched Logan with a weary gaze. “You are… more than that. And I apologize for making you believe that was all you were. I had misspoken when conversing with the others. I had been referring to our experiments and the results I had been getting from them. But I had not meant that that had been all you were to me.” Was it a trick of the poor lighting or was that a blush coating Logan’s cheeks? Deceit slowly moved a little more out of his hiding.
“I am still perfecting my abilities in understanding and expressing Feelings. So the fault is my own for not being more open and honest. I am used to my way of dealing with things, with facts and science and logic backing everything up. We do not fight or throw insults during our time together, so logically it dictates that we get along and find each other agreeable. The concept that I would need to express it eluded me.” Deceit had fully left his blanket hiding place and sat up fully in bed.
“Sssso we’re freindssss?” he asked and hated how vulnerable he sounded.
“Affirmative.” Logan answered, adjusting his glasses. “However, given how feelings apparently need to be voiced out and expressed, I must expand on the subject.” Mismatched eyes blinked, confused. What more could be said? “In regards of your earlier statement-” Oh! Color drained from his face as he realized what Logan was referring to. His confession. “I’ll admit it was a relief to hear.” Wait what?
“What do you mean?” he couldn’t help but ask, heart -that he may or may not have- racing.
“I too hold romantic emotions in regards to you.” A beat of silence fell over them before he was even capable of processing that. Logan… Logan liked him too?
“Oh.” he squealed out, the constricting of his throat stinging.
“Yes, and since we both experience the same feelings for each other, it would be logical that we then would be a couple.” Oh! “But Roman had informed me that I need to ask you if that is agreeable to you.” The confused look on Logan’s face was kind of funny and a tiny smile slipped on his lips. “Would that be agreeable to you?”
A started chuckle left his lips before he nodded slowly. “No not at all.” he lied, his puffy eyes sparkling with mischief. At first Logan looked upset but then he paused and narrowed his eyes as he looked closer to Deceit. He seemed to figure out the false words and his shoulders dropped in what looked like relief. “I would like that.” he continued on, this time speaking honestly.
A sniff was made, reminding them both of how emotionally distraught they had been. Looking guilty and awkward, Logan fidgeted where he stood. Taking pity on the other, Deceit reached out and gestured for him to come closer. Following the silent orders, Logan did just that. Once he got close enough, Deceit grabbed his hand and pulled him down onto the bed. “Sssso,” he began, his hand nervously holding the other’s. “What now?”
“I… do not know.” Logan confessed. He certainly didn’t look happy about that. Deceit had one clue as to what to do next, but he wasn’t sure how much the other would like it. But he was feeling a little braver, given the turn out of things, and squeezed Logan’s hand.
“Kiss me?” he asked, his voice a hoarse whisper. Silence fell over them as Logan stared with wide eyes. And just as Deceit was about to take it back, cover it up with a lie to deny any actual want, Logan nodded his head and used his free hand to cup his scaled cheek. Slowly Logan moved closer and lowered his head. Deceit moved his own to help close the space, his eyes slipping closed.
Lips met in a hesitance kiss, soft and simple. But it made him feel tingly and pleased. It ended soon after and his eyes fluttered open. “That wassss terrible.” he said, not even hiding that he was lying. “We definitely sshouldn’t do that again.” Of course as soon as he said that, he was leaning in again for another kiss. Logan gladly gave it.