Chapter Text
"Um," Dr. Stephen Strange, Sorcerer Supreme, said.
"What?" Tony blinked at him, his fingers stilling. It took a moment for his brain to figure out why Stephen Strange, Helen Cho, Jane Foster, Darcy Lewis, Peter Parker, Loki, Reed Richards, Hank McCoy, and Bruce Banner were standing in the doorway to his workshop. He'd been so deep into figuring out the new specs for the Iron Man armor that the world had blurred around him, leaving time to fall by the wayside.
"It's Monday the 14th, 3:05pm," JARVIS chimed in helpfully.
"Really?" Tony said, astonished. He would've bet fifty bucks that it was only Saturday. Well, at least that explained it. A couple times a week, the science and magic users of the Avengers and associated crew gathered to... well, officially they gathered to talk, but usually it devolved into friendly squabbles and bickering. Loki in particular enjoyed throwing out some wild aspect of magical "rules" and then watching the rest of them collectively lose their minds over how ridiculous magic could be.
"Yes, really," JARVIS said.
"Okay. Well, come on in, guys. Let me just close this stuff up..." Tony trailed off, attention flipping back to the holograms beneath his fingers. He tossed a few things in the garbage bin but saved the rest for further perusal; he was still working on a way to make a suit with appropriate underwater weapons that wouldn't be too bulky to wear.
"Uh, Tony?" Jane said, not moving from where she was standing.
"What?" Tony dropped his hands and glanced at her, frowning when he realized that none of them had entered. They should all be used to his workshop by now, since they regularly held their meetings down here - that was thanks to Steve, who'd gotten all bent out of shape the last time Loki and Stephen got into a magic contest and ended up blowing up the microwave. After that, Steve put his foot down and maintained that any further meetings had to take place in either the training room, Tony's workshop or outside and away from civilians.
"You've got a supersoldier wrapped around you like bacon around a scallop," Darcy said, when it became clear no one else was going to speak.
Tony blinked several times and then looked down, starting in surprise when he realized that she was right. Bucky Barnes was kneeling on the floor beside him, arms wrapped so snugly around Tony's waist that a piece of paper wouldn't have been able to fit between them. His face was buried in Tony's stomach, which at least explained the weird resistance to breathing that Tony had noted two... no, three hours ago. Tony put a hand on Bucky's head, curious, and felt the way Bucky shifted under his touch. But Bucky didn't pull away, and when Tony prodded at Bucky's shields he realized that they were more worn than they should've been.
Hadn't Bucky had a therapy session this morning? His eyes flicked over to where his own partner was laying, coiled up in a small circle. Bucky's partner was stalking around the room, betraying the anxiety Bucky was feeling right now. Tony sighed inwardly, realizing what Bucky needed, and looked back at the group in the doorway. Everyone looked politely confused, except for Peter, who was trying to hide a smile, Loki, who was outright grinning, and Bruce, who was saying a hell of a lot with his judgmental eyebrows raised sky high.
"Right, well, I can talk at the same time," Tony said brightly. He was always aware of Bucky and Steve. Always. They may not have had an official bond, but Tony was the only guide on the team. It was natural that he'd have a feel for when the only sentinels on the team needed help. Now that his attention wasn't focused on the armor, he could lowkey feel Bucky's distress in the back of his mind. Had they been alone, Tony would've cooed and stroked Bucky's hair. Because they had company, he settled for expertly diverting all of his mental energy to wrapping Bucky up in the equivalent of a cocoon. The tension flowed out of Bucky as he was shielded from the world, and Tony smiled in response.
Darcy shrugged. "Works for me!" She sashayed into the room. The others slowly followed, many of them casting odd looks at the sentinel supersoldier on the floor. Tony pretended not to notice.
Their meeting wasn't as fun as usual, though. It was hard work keeping a sentinel completely shielded, especially one like Bucky, so Tony's contribution was definitely lackluster at best. After all, Tony was exceptional at what he did, but he had to admit that Steve and Bucky were beginning to wear on him. Just a little bit. It was just... it was hard to keep helping out sentinels that you weren't bonded to. Without a bond, Tony was on his own. He had no feedback of energy, he had no extra resources to draw from, it was just him. And lately, Bucky and Steve were requiring a lot of him.
He continued to pretend not to notice that several people in the group were casting him concerned looks. He was an old pro at that now. After all, he'd been pretending that he couldn't see Steve's partner since the day Steve showed up on the Helicarrier. Really, he should've gotten an Oscar for that performance: it was pretty hard to miss the enormous golden wolf that prowled around Steve's side. Just like, three years later when Bucky Barnes was brought to the Tower, it was hard to miss the antlers of the black deer that strutted along at Bucky's side.
But Tony wasn't supposed to be able to see them. Only soulmates could see each other's partners, and whole history books had been devoted to the epic soulmates that were Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes. The fact that Tony, a guide, could see the partners of two sentinels meant nothing. The fact that he had the famous forget-me-nots twined around a black star as a soul mark on his lower left hip meant nothing. Because Steve and Bucky were soulmates, and they were very happy together, and there was absolutely no room for Tony Stark to fit between them.
"Alright, time to break it up. I have an appointment to get to," Stephen said finally. A flick of his hand and the golden sparks that Darcy and Peter had been running their hands through vanished.
Helen turned to him with an interested look. "This appointment, it wouldn't be a date with Christine, would it?"
"That's none of your business," Stephen said.
"Oooh, it is!" Darcy squealed.
Stephen ignored them, turning to Hank. "Do you want me to drop you off at the mansion?"
"Please," Hank said, gently straightening his glasses with a furry blue hand. "I'm always interested in the opportunity to experience your portals. They're fascinating."
"Could you drop me off as well?" Reed asked, perking up.
"Of course." Stephen created three separate portals. Within a moment, the workshop was emptier of three people. Loki just vanished. Darcy, Helen and Jane wandered out talking in low tones. Peter and Bruce walked out behind them. That left Tony and Bucky alone.
"Alright, Snowflake. Feeling better?" Tony asked. He had a wicked headache now, and it only got worse every time he moved his head. But he kept the pain carefully separate from Bucky.
"Yes," Bucky said slowly.
"I can let the shield down?"
Bucky nodded against Tony's stomach. Tony sighed and let the shields come apart. His head throbbed at the backlash that came from ending them so quickly, but he didn't care. He was exhausted. He carefully pried Bucky's arms apart and sank down onto his stool, his legs suddenly feeling weak. Bucky looked up at him from where he was still kneeling on the floor. His face was pale and his eyes were hollow, but he no longer had that far-off look in his eyes that meant the Winter Soldier was little too close to the surface for comfort. In spite of his pounding head, Tony managed to smile at him.
"Sorry," Bucky said softly, standing. "Therapy... it didn't go so well."
"It's fine. You know I don't mind," Tony told him, because it was the truth.
"Are you sure?" Bucky asked, frowning slightly. "You don't look great."
"Thanks, Buck. Always aim high with the compliments," Tony said, keeping his voice light and teasing. He knew he'd succeeded when Bucky just rolled his eyes.
"You know what I mean."
"I just didn't sleep last night. I was all caught up in working on something Pepper sent me. I should probably go have a nap, now that I think about it." Tony didn't have to fake muffling a yawn. Food and sleep. That's what he needed the most right now.
"Snack first?" Bucky suggested.
"I could do with that," Tony agreed, knowing that Bucky liked to repay him with food. "I'll be right up."
Bucky nodded. "Come to the communal kitchen."
The second he was gone, Tony doubled over and put both hands to his head with a groan. He rubbed at his temples for several seconds, trying to ease the pressure that had built up. He was really getting too old for this. Guides weren't meant to help sentinels like this long-term, at least not without some kind of bond in place. Add in the fact that every time Tony helped out Steve and Bucky, he was actively working to prevent their bond from snapping into place, and it was leaving him exhausted in a way that sleep couldn't always help.
It would be so much easier if he could just tell them the truth, but Tony knew better than that. It was blatantly obvious to anyone who spent more than five minutes with them that Steve and Bucky were deeply in love. Right now, both of them had assumed that their guide had died a long time ago. If they knew that Tony was their guide, they would definitely want to bond with him to make things more stable for all three of them... and then Tony would have a firsthand look at what a love like that was really like, all without ever getting to experience it himself. Tony might have been self-destructive in a lot of ways, but that? That was more than even he would be able to handle.
"The guide thing is ruining my fucking life," he grumbled under his breath.
"May I say, Sir, that you have only yourself to blame?" JARVIS said.
"No you may not," Tony said grumpily. JARVIS was right. He never should've helped Steve out that day. But how could he stop himself? Steve had been a sentinel in the middle of a new century, confronted with literally dozens of new smells, sights, sounds, experiences... it was practically a given that Steve would fall into a zone, especially since he was still reeling from losing his soulmate and fellow sentinel.
"Perhaps you should've told Captain Rogers from day one."
"Perhaps you should shut up," Tony said, standing.
There was no answer, which meant that JARVIS was sulking. Tony sighed again and started slowly walking towards the door. Soulmates were bad enough, but when you added in sentinels and guides on top of it then everything just got needlessly complicated. He did have to figure something out. He was aware enough to know that, thank you very much. But he just wasn't sure what the right answer is. The last thing he wanted was pity from Bucky or Steve, but this scenario just wasn't feasible long-term. It would probably ended up with Tony giving himself a heart attack from giving too much to one of his sentinels someday.
He made his way up to the kitchen, where Bucky had put together a platter of sandwiches. Natasha and Bruce were already sitting at the table. Tony sat and snagged himself a sandwich, carefully avoiding the twin concerned looks being cast in his direction. Bucky joined them, setting a glass of water in front of Tony. He ate three sandwiches and drank the water while their conversation flew over his head. The food helped to ease the ache in his head a little, but what he really needed was a dark room and quiet.
As quickly and quietly as possible, he slipped away from the table and made his way up to his bedroom. As he walked in, he said, "J, I know you're mad, but I would love you if you could dim the lights."
The lights dimmed, and JARVIS said, "You love me regardless."
"Can't argue that," Tony said with a small smile, shoulders relaxing. He was contemplating a shower when there was a knock on the door behind him. He sighed, turned, and opened it.
Natasha stood there, a bottle of painkillers and another glass of water in her hands. "You should tell them."
"I don't want to," Tony said, pouting.
She rolled her eyes. "This is going to kill you. Think about how sad that would make them. Do I look like I want to deal with a sad Captain America and Winter Soldier for the rest of my life?"
"You'd survive," Tony said.
"Tony." Natasha gave him a severe look.
"I don't want their pity, Natasha. That would be worse than dying." Tony set his jaw, pushing aside memories of cold sneers and comments about how guides would never amount to anything worthwhile.
"You're their soulmate, Tony. It was never about pity," Natasha said, not unkindly. She dumped the pills and glass into his hands. "If you don't tell them, I will."
"You wouldn't!"
"I absolutely would. There is no way you are going to die on my watch." She spun on her heel and stalked away.
"That's not really your call to make!" Tony yelled after her. She flipped him off as she got into the elevator. Tony sighed and opened up the painkillers, popping two into his mouth and draining half the glass of water. Then he went over and faceplanted onto the bed, hoping that some sleep would help an impossible situation.