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Celeborn watched the faint glow that emanated from Elrond's hand as he worked to stabilize their newest wounded refugee. Most of the war-wounded had been tended to on the way to this hidden valley, but stragglers continued to arrive every day. Sauron's forces were merciless as they tried to rout out any Elves they could find.
Glancing along the long line of wounded Elrond had already helped to heal, Celeborn was pleased to see that he had only this patient and one more before he could finally take a break.
Elrond had been working continuously for days: tending the wounded, allocating and arranging the distribution of such supplies as remained, overseeing the building of shelters, and determining both defensive and offensive strategies.
They would have a long way to go before all these tasks could be fully accomplished. At present, all they could offer the injured for shelter was a large canopy, with a few tents set aside for those with the worst wounds.
Celeborn was trying to help however he could, allocating his own resources to help Elrond out. But Sauron's attack had decimated their numbers. Certainly none of Celeborn's people had Elrond's magic for healing. Even the healers among Elrond's contingent of Elves had to wait for him to heal the worst of the injuries.
His presence was a gift.
"Lord Celeborn?"
Turning, Celeborn saw Erestor approaching him. The normally elegant advisor was looking a little ragged around the edges at the moment as he did his part to fulfill all of Elrond's commands.
"The sentry guards wish to speak with you."
"About the bridge?" Celeborn asked.
Erestor nodded. "They rigged up a pulley system to transfer the supplies as you directed, but they still advocate building a bridge."
"Is the ford insufficient?"
"They say it will flood in the spring."
"Spring is a long way off. We don't want to give the enemy an easier route to reach us," Celeborn said.
Erestor shrugged. "The sentries say it would be an easy choke point to defend if it came to that. Besides, by the time the enemy reached the bridge, we would already have lost our patrols and half our forces. The bridge would be the least of our worries in such a scenario."
Celeborn considered that. Tactically, the sentries were quite right. However, their perspective did not encompass the entirety of the current situation.
"Maybe so, but given the list of things that need to happen before this place is completely secure and habitable, a bridge is not really a priority while the ford is available," he said.
"And so I told them." Some of Erestor's frustration leaked into his voice. "But if they don't get a bridge, they want to build walls along the banks and erect guard towers."
Celeborn scowled. "Guard towers? What's wrong with the trees?"
"Trees can be felled and burned," Erestor said, clearly quoting what he'd been told.
Celeborn rolled his eyes. "So can towers."
Erestor opened his mouth to reply, but Celeborn held up his hand to stay him. "Very well, I will talk to them."
Celeborn glanced over towards Elrond, who had managed to stop the bleeding and was now cleaning out his patient's wounds. "You'll keep an eye on him?"
"Of course."
Celeborn had wanted to catch Elrond as soon as he had finished healing to make sure he rested. He was worried that Elrond was overextending himself. At least Celeborn could deal with the guards on his own, and relieve Elrond of one headache. If he hurried, he still might be in time to catch Elrond before another task demanded his attention.
**************************************************
Three hours later, Celeborn was finally able to return to the large forest clearing where the majority of their number had chosen to stay.
As he walked, the soft notes of music began to drift towards him. Music to lighten the souls of weary soldiers and homeless refugees was not uncommon so it took Celeborn a few seconds to realize that this music was quite different.
He quickened his pace.
When he arrived, he found the majority of Elves looking towards the treeline and the open meadow beyond. There, Elrond stood alone as he sang.
The hairs on the back of Celeborn's neck stood up as he listened. This was no ordinary song. Celeborn was well versed in songs of power, having heard Melian sing her Girdle into existence. It was an ancient art that only the most powerful of spirit and gifted in language could manage.
Celeborn was surprised that Elrond knew the art, but not surprised he was capable of it. After a moment's thought, he concluded Círdan had likely taught it to him.
That was immaterial at present. Glancing about, Celeborn spotted Erestor among the gawking crowd. He grabbed his arm and pulled him away so that they would not be overheard.
"I thought I told you to look after Elrond," Celeborn said.
Erestor gave him a putout look as he yanked his arm free. "And how exactly did you expect me to stop him? Sit on him?"
"If you had to!" Even as he said it, Celeborn knew he was being unfair. Erestor could never do that. Celeborn took a deep breath, not actually angry with Erestor. It wasn't his fault Elrond wasn't looking after himself.
More calmly, Celeborn asked, "How long has he been singing?"
"About a half hour or so. He finished up with the last two patients and then consulted on the settlement's progress. With no other injured and all else proceeding apace . . . well, he said he wanted to add a little more protection if he could."
Celeborn let out a frustrated sigh. Their situation had been dire when they found this hidden valley but steadily improving since then. They had sentries and guards hidden in trees along every egress into the valley, which would give them ample warning to mount a defense or hide before a battle was joined.
This really could have waited until Elrond had had a proper night's sleep.
There was nothing to be done about it now. Elrond had begun, and it was unwise to interrupt a song of power.
Celeborn paced uneasily as the melodious notes floated through the air. He could feel the spell being woven around him, and he wished he could enjoy the beauty of the music and admire the craftsmanship of the song.
All he could think, though, was how poorly timed this was. Elrond had barely had any rest for days, and songs of power were extremely demanding. He needed to take some much-required time for himself.
Celeborn was relieved when the song sounded like it was approaching its conclusion. The last note was soft and wavered just at the end.
As soon as the last note died away, Elrond stumbled and then collapsed. Already tense as a bowstring, Celeborn surged forward, just barely managing to catch him before he hit the ground. Looking at Elrond in his arms, Celeborn saw that he was completely out.
He cursed under his breath.
Erestor rushed forward, trailed by several others who had been part of the crowd. Sternly, Celeborn said, "Give him space."
"Is he all right?" Erestor asked anxiously.
Seeing his genuine concern, Celeborn softened. "He's just overextended himself. He'll be fine with some proper rest."
Celeborn glanced around at the crowd. At his warning look, several people did step back, but there were still many curious and concerned faces. "I will take him where he can't be disturbed."
Erestor looked unhappy at this pronouncement, doubtless wanting to keep Elrond where he was sure he would be well protected. Celeborn knew that the likelihood of some 'essential' problem coming up that only Elrond could deal with would be too high if they remained nearby, so he was ready to argue for Elrond's removal.
Unexpectedly, one of Elrond's fellow healers piped up in support. "That is an excellent idea," she stated firmly, shouldering past the group of onlookers to place a pillow on Elrond. Smiling, she said, "You should also get some rest, my lord. You would both be better for the respite. We shall be fine for a day without you."
She cast a stern look behind her, and most of the crowd took her hint to scatter. Erestor seemed to reconsider his initial hesitation. Straightening, he said, "Indeed, we will. Don't worry about a thing, my lord. I will handle things here."
"I have every faith that you will," Celeborn said.
He wasted no time in carrying Elrond away from the curious onlookers. Once in the privacy of the forest, Celeborn paused to look down at Elrond once more. Elrond's head was pillowed against his shoulder, but Celeborn could still see his face. Even asleep, his expression looked pinched with fatigue, and he was far too pale.
Celeborn should have put his foot down earlier. Now that he had the opportunity, he was keen to seize it to make sure Elrond would get some proper rest.
With a particular spot in mind, Celeborn moved quickly through the sparse forest until he came to a rivulet. Growing along the bank of this stream was a mighty tree with a very thick trunk and wild branches growing in all directions. Celeborn had to duck under a few of the tangled limbs to get to the trunk itself.
The stream was clearly one that helped to flood the distant Bruinen, eroding a nice little hollow between two of the tree's massive roots. The cozy pocket of space was dry now. Wildflowers and soft grass made a surprisingly spongy bed upon which Celeborn could lay Elrond down.
The roots came up protectively around them, and Celeborn could even slide Elrond half under one to keep him further out of view.
Setting down the pillow, Celeborn unfastened his cloak and spread it over Elrond. He then slid in beside him under the tree limb. Using the pillow to support his own head, he carefully repositioned Elrond so that the Half-Elf could use Celeborn's chest for his own pillow.
That seemed comfortable enough for both of them. Celeborn wasn't ready to fall asleep just yet. His nerves were still charged and ready for danger, but he enjoyed the restful atmosphere. Above him, he saw only the tangled limbs of the tree. Beside him, Elrond was a warm weight.
It was peaceful.
**************************************************
For an hour, the quiet remained undisturbed, but then Elrond began to stir.
"Sh, go back to sleep," Celeborn said softly, not wanting Elrond's sleep to be interrupted by awakening so soon. His wish was not granted. Elrond muttered and shifted restlessly, and eventually lifted his head to look at Celeborn with bleary, unfocused eyes.
Celeborn sighed.
"What . . .?" Elrond looked adorably befuddled for a moment, as if he couldn't quite process Celeborn's presence. He blinked a few times, trying to get his mental gears turning, but clearly having a far harder time than he should.
Celeborn really wished he would go back to sleep. "It's all right, Elrond. Everything's fine. Go back to sleep."
Elrond squinted at him, and Celeborn wasn't sure if he had even been heard. "What's going on?"
"What is going on is that you are getting some rest. Or you were."
"No, I was doing something. Something important?" Elrond didn't sound very sure of himself.
"You wove a protective spell for this valley," Celeborn said. He rubbed Elrond's arm, hoping to coax him back to sleep.
"The song!" Elrond bolted upright, and it was only Celeborn's quick reflexes that kept him from hitting his head on the root above them. Elrond didn't seem to notice that, as his sudden movement apparently made him dizzy. He swayed, and Celeborn sat up to steady him.
"Elrond, lie back down. You are in no condition for this."
"But the song; did it work?" Even as he spoke, Elrond allowed Celeborn to push him back down.
"Yes." Celeborn glanced around the forest. He could sense the difference already. "I can feel it taking hold in the roots of this place. Already the trees are responding."
Indeed, the gnarled fellow they were curled against was standing a little straighter if Celeborn wasn't mistaken.
He turned his gaze back to Elrond, reaching out to gently stroke his cheek. "It's more welcoming than I expected. Was that what you were aiming for?"
Elrond gave a halting nod. "I wanted to call anyone who was seeking refuge to come here, and anyone seeking mischief to lose their way. I suppose that was too complicated for my skills."
"Not at all," Celeborn assured. "I thought your song was lovely, and it's certainly taking effect even now. I am sure it will accomplish your goal. However, it would have been better if you had been fully awake. You ought to have waited."
"But there's no time," Elrond said, agitated. "Sauron's forces are overrunning Eriador. The longer we wait to respond, the further entrenched he will be."
Celeborn gave Elrond a sympathetic look. "I know you are worried about Gil-Galad and the others in Lindon, but we must be realistic. We are too few to do more than harass Sauron, and we would do so only to our own detriment."
"But we cannot let his evil go unanswered. Already his army has caused so much suffering and destruction. If he continues unchecked, all this land will be laid waste."
"Elrond, you are weary. You must see that it is folly to attempt such an attack in our present condition. We have many wounded. Our supplies are limited. We must make more arrows and forge new armor. Yes, we must oppose Sauron but it cannot be today. Our strength will grow, and the time for action will come. We must make sure we are in a position to do something when that time comes. But the key word is time. We cannot force things to happen overnight, no matter how much we wish otherwise. You must give all of us -- yourself included -- time to heal first."
Elrond looked unhappy but Celeborn could see he did not disagree. "It all seems so pointless." He flopped his head back, looking up at the tree limbs above them. "We can build a sanctuary here as we have built sanctuaries and fortresses and grand cities before, yet all are wiped away in destruction and chaos. Ost-in-Edhil is gone."
"But we are still here, are we not?" Celeborn said gently.
Elrond turned his head to Celeborn and contemplated him for a moment. "I'm sorry. I know I am being defeatist."
"You are weary. Things look darkest when your mind is tired. A good night's sleep will reinvigorate you," Celeborn said.
"There's no time for sleep. Once the settlement is up and the wounded are mended and our defenses are secure, then I can sleep." Elrond tried to get up, but Celeborn pressed a hand to his chest to stop him.
"No, Elrond. You must make time for sleep. What you hope to accomplish will not come about if you are dead on your feet. You know that. Would you not prescribe the same for your patients?"
He could see that argument take root, but Elrond still hesitated. Celeborn wished he would just give in. He really did look exhausted.
"Perhaps you are right . . ." Elrond finally said.
Celeborn smiled. "I am. Now, lay back and let yourself sleep. The rest can wait for tomorrow."
Blinking tiredly, Elrond was docile as Celeborn shifted the pillow under his head for his comfort. He kept his focus on Celeborn's face but he looked so bleary-eyed that Celeborn wasn't sure if he was actually seeing anything.
Reaching out, Celeborn let his finger slip along a lock of Elrond's long hair before following its course to stroke Elrond's soft cheek. He meant it as a soothing gesture, hoping to lull Elrond back to sleep.
For his part, Elrond seemed mesmerized. His focus never wavered from Celeborn. Celeborn's smile softened as he met his sleepy gaze, continuing to softly stroke Elrond's cheek.
The moment was quiet and comfortable to Celeborn, and he thought it was to Elrond too. He thought he was only a few moments away from Elrond falling under the peaceful atmosphere and finally giving in to his body's need for sleep.
But suddenly Elrond's whole demeanor shifted as if he'd been spooked. His focus went from sleepy to alarmed, and he flinched back.
Before Celeborn could react to the sudden change, Elrond was looking around him and once again trying to sit up.
"No, I should . . . There's too much to do. Yes, we have to . . . I have to . . ." Elrond didn't seem to know what it was he had to do, and Celeborn was sure whatever it was that had spooked him was not whatever it was he was going on about.
Alarmed himself, Celeborn said, "What is it? What's wrong?"
Elrond only shook his head. "There are patients to see and I . . ."
He tried to push himself to his feet, but he was so depleted that his hands gave out under him and he fell backwards. Celeborn was there to catch him but the close call had him reacting with more decisive action.
Grabbing each of Elrond's wrists, he pressed them down onto the ground besides Elrond's head and hovered over Elrond so that he was effectively pinned and couldn't inadvertently hurt himself. "Elrond, what is it?"
Whatever energy Elrond had managed to get him this far had quickly abandoned him. Once again, he blinked tiredly as if he couldn't quite get his eyes to focus on Celeborn hovering right above him.
"I . . ." Elrond glanced around, as if the answer to the question was somewhere around him. But it was plain to Celeborn that there was no answer.
Letting his head fall back onto the pillow, Elrond looked above him at the tree for a long moment. Celeborn said nothing, sensing patience was his ally here.
"When we found this valley, I had a premonition of a house with many rooms," Elrond finally said.
"Yes, you said." Celeborn could tell this non sequitur was not whatever had spooked Elrond but he trusted the truth would come when the time was right. "You said you envisioned a welcoming way-station for anyone seeking passage over the mountains. I thought it sounded like a lovely idea."
Elrond nodded, but there was something sad in his eyes. "I saw it filled with warmth and merriment . . . at least for a while. But that wasn't all I saw."
He seemed far away to Celeborn, whose concern grew. "Elrond?"
At the call of his name, Elrond finally met Celeborn's eyes. "I saw the home decayed and ravaged by the ruin of time. What we build here will come to dust."
"That is the way of many of our works," Celeborn said. "But I take heart that if you have foreseen your house's end in decay, then it will outlast the destruction of Sauron and other violence."
He kept his tone gentle, not wanting to dismiss whatever vision Elrond had foreseen, but he hoped to offer comfort for whatever it was.
Elrond closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, there was a new weariness in them -- no longer just the understandable exhaustion of the body but now a soul-deep weariness that made Celeborn's heart ache to see.
"How can you stand it? None of your homes have lasted. Doriath was sacked. Sirion was burned. Balar sank. Now you can add Ost-in-Edhil to the list."
"And you fear for Lindon," Celeborn said, shrewdly guessing the heart of the matter.
Elrond shook his head but it wasn't to refute Celeborn's observation. "Aren't you tired of it? Aren't you afraid to lose another home? Doesn't it discourage you from trying to build again when what you build won't last?"
"No, Elrond." Celeborn's tone was low and firm. He could tell they had become sidetracked from the real issue but this was clearly something Elrond had been privately nursing in his heart, and Celeborn would see him reassured. "Each time I have had to rebuild, I see only hope. We have lost something, yes, but we are still here. Sauron, and Morgoth before him, want to crush our spirits so that we never make anything worthwhile again. Every time we build anew, I see only that they have failed."
"And when the building is done? We just wait until the next calamity strikes to give us the opportunity to rebuild again?" Elrond asked, frustration in his voice.
"That is a terribly gloomy way of looking at things, and not one I think you truly ascribe to. You are tired, Elrond. But," Celeborn said before Elrond could object, "I will answer your charge. Yes, it does grieve me to have lost my homes in the past. Every new settlement that I have come to I hope will be a permanent home. But it doesn't matter if it is or is not because what makes a home is the people who share it with me. Home is family and friends. That is what you must hold onto."
"But so many died," Elrond said, the soul-deep weariness once again shining through. "Celebrimbor is gone, and all the Gwaith-i-Mírdain, and so many who are dear to us, and the war has just begun. How many more will we lose?"
Celeborn sighed. He couldn't say he was unaffected. There were many times these last few weeks when he would call for an old friend to complete the current task and remember that the Elf in question had been cut down by the rampaging orcs. It was still too fresh for Celeborn. He had not had time to properly grieve, and he knew the time for that had not yet come. They needed to build a stronghold against Sauron before he would have that luxury.
"We have suffered many losses, have we not?" Celeborn said sadly. "I understand the weight upon your heart. It is upon my own as well. I do not know what to say to comfort you. I cannot pretend that we won't lose more friends along the way. I can only tell you what I have learned in my long life. Looking at every face I see and wondering if it will be the last time is no way to live. It is not in my power to prevent every death or hurt in the world."
"So, what do you do?" Elrond asked.
"I embrace the moment in which I stand. I will prepare for the future, but the present is all that I truly have. Right now, the present has provided me with you, and I am delighted with the opportunity."
Celeborn's tone was serious but definite. He let his thumb slide over the delicate skin of Elrond's wrist, hoping to make his meaning more clear.
Elrond swallowed, once again watching Celeborn as he had before he spooked. Gently, he tugged his wrists, and Celeborn immediately let go. He set his hands down on the ground beside Elrond's head but otherwise didn't move.
Softly, he said, "It's all right to want things for yourself." It was a guess on Celeborn's part, but one he felt fairly confident in. He waited to see what Elrond would do.
His patience was rewarded when Elrond hesitantly reached up to wind a finger around a stray lock of Celeborn's hair. There was the barest hint of a tug, but it was enough for Celeborn.
Shifting onto one elbow, he cupped Elrond's face with his free hand. Elrond made no move to resist when Celeborn pressed a kiss to his lips, and there was only a moment's hesitation before he was kissing back.
Elrond wrapped an arm around Celeborn's neck. He may have wanted to deepen the kiss, but there was no strength behind his hold. The feel of his hand shaking where it was still holding onto Celeborn's hair made Celeborn break the kiss.
Looking down at him, Celeborn saw that Elrond's face had a lovely flush to it. His lips were now glossy from the kiss, and his expression was soft as he met Celeborn's eyes.
But the rest of him was plainly exhausted.
Celeborn offered a rueful smile. He wanted more but he shouldn't be surprised this was the moment Elrond finally admitted to his feelings -- a moment when he was too exhausted to deny himself.
"Go to sleep," Celeborn said gently.
Elrond's eyes fluttered tiredly but he valiantly fought off the pull of sleep. "But what if-"
Celeborn shook his head and pressed another quick kiss to Elrond's lips. "We can discuss all of it tomorrow when you have had a proper rest. I promise I will love you as much tomorrow as I do now. My interest will not wane."
"But what about-"
"Whatever you are worried about is fine, Elrond. I promise." Celeborn's smile was soft, and he did not censor his expression. He must surely be telegraphing his affection, but Elrond could barely keep his eyes open so he didn't know if Elrond could tell. "Go to sleep, my love."
Elrond's protest this time was a sleepy murmur, and he was clearly losing the fight. Celeborn shifted back to resituate them. He was heartened when Elrond reached for him, clearly not wanting him to go away.
Quickly, he settled them back down so that Elrond was once again pillowed contentedly upon his chest.
Elrond had no reserves left, and was asleep almost immediately. Celeborn regarded him with a fond smile. He was looking forward to tomorrow, but he took his own advice, and enjoyed this moment for what it was.
In the shadow of a fine old tree with Elrond asleep at his side, Celeborn was content.