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No matter how angry I get, I know I can’t live without her. I want her in my life. She is ruining me, bringing me to the ground and lifting me up again with her love. I can get destroyed three hundred times in a minute, shattered into a million tiny pieces and gathered and healed for a second by her kiss. My mind struggles with her excessive and authoritative behavior. I hate when someone tries to control me, to manipulate me. But she does it in a delicate, invisible way, pushing all the right buttons, pulling all strings of my heart.
Sometimes I manage to slip away, try to regain control, or at least that’s what I think until she pulls the invisible love chain around my neck with just one simple look. These blue eyes are scary, they promise me the world and at the same time divide me down to the smallest I can be. They have power over me, they can easily bring me to my knees and make me want to worship her all over again. I saw my future in these blue eyes. Filling me with hope, she made me dream about tomorrow. I was ready to even build a temple for her, home for the two of us...
I want to lock her away, keep her to myself and never let anyone hurt her, but it’s too late… She loves her freedom, I know. And I love and respect her too much to take away the world and its beauty from her.
I will let her go… but just as I am drawn to her, she is drawn to me. She will come back. Why? Because I control her too, she is my slave as I am hers. I wrapped her in my net and imprinted my name on her heart. She will compare every lover to me, she will whisper my name in the dark, her hands will seek mine... Time and distance can’t erase what we have, you can’t forget someone who gave you so much to remember. She can try and run away, but we both know in whose bed she’ll end up in the end. Her lips will meet mine and in her eyes I will see my reflection. It’s a sick cycle for both of us, tearing up our souls and leaving us trembling in the night - completely destroyed but always asking for more.
Oh, the things we do for love… we are doomed but just enough. The battle for control between us is far from over. But in a war with your love... how can you win?