Work Text:
Two men stand on opposites sides of a shared bedroom, arguing, surrounded by a mess of personal artifacts and clothing, everything scattered about like a typhoon had gone digging for something important in the closet. The house around them creaks against the outside's rushing winds, its old boards moaning as if protesting the shouting-match carrying on inside.
The two men, twins, -- a brother and his younger sibling -- gesticulate furiously to one another, voices rising higher and higher with each turn of the heated conversation. They were alone, save for each other's company, unheard by the neighbors under the roar of pulsating airs. Both were red in the face -- as red as the elder's hoodie -- splattered crimson in a fit of passion. Their teeth clenched between each exclaimed syllable, violently grinding the enamel away. Their wild, waving hands burned at the palm with the agitated crescent-shape indents of nail, the marks renewed with each curl of the knuckle. They pace about the floor, occasionally taking the moment to pause and stomp a foot in emphasis to a particularly strong point.
Osomatsu and Choromatsu had been arguing for what seemed like hours now, equally sore in both bone and heart, waging war with every accusatory statement and biting opinion they spewed. Choromatsu had been expecting some kind of idiotic blow-up from his older brother, spurred on by his fear of change and clingy selfish-nature, but he just simply wasn't prepared -- couldn't have ever prepared -- for this huge of a fight. They've fought before, it was nothing, yet, this fight was turning out to be a fight to end all fights; it was the Goliath on Wall Street that made everything else shake in their boots just looking up at it. It made all of their past arguments look like petty squabbles, even when fists were swung and bruises were made.
Maybe... Maybe this fight would be better if it was more petty; maybe it'd be better if it was more fist and less word, because the weight of word now was way heavier than any punch ever could be -- hit harder than any pointed fist aimed at the mouth ever did. They spelled out unspoken truths, highlighted every piece of flawed characteristic, poked at any remnants of self-esteem that were left after years of grueling societal-shame. These words; they were balls of fire, spit out hot like magma at their feet, igniting the surrounding matter.
Everything was aflame around the two brothers, burning up precious memories and beloved moments, and, -- if they weren't careful enough -- their very selves as well. The heat was agony against their flesh and the smoke was just as drying as it was suffocating, making sentences hoarse and unstable as they flew past the lips. Their eyes watered-up in pain, but the tears went unacknowledged.
"I don't see why you have to leave at all!" Osomatsu shouts at his green counterpart, stretching his arms out in front of himself, palms-up.
"Because just being around you will drag me down!" Choromatsu quickly rebuts, mirroring Osomatsu's pose.
"I'm just trying to do what's best for us!"
"Well, I never asked for this! I never wanted this!"
Osomatsu takes a step back, eyes swelling with hurt, facial expression shattered -- a ghost of its usual, grinning self. Choromatsu had meant many different things when he said "this", but it was clear exactly which way Osomatsu had personally taken it to mean. The broken look the elder casts has Choromatsu violently resisting the wave of must soothe, must comfort, didn't mean it, don't worry that immediately overcomes him, even as he feels regret build up thick in the back of his throat.
"All I want is some time to myself..." Choromatsu murmurs to the ground, features softening, wrapping his arms around his torso to keep them from reaching out towards the wrong person.
Seeing the way Choromatsu melts into himself, no longer volatile but rather small and somber, Osomatsu can't help but rush to his side. He stands inches away from his twin, a stark contrast to their earlier, opposing positions, and lays a gentle hand on each arm, bending his body to meet Choromatsu's down-turned gaze. When what he says finally comes out, his voice is so low and delicate that it nearly strains Choromatsu's ears to hear, but it is nonetheless full of fervor and affection.
"Looking in your eyes, I'm coming home --"
Choromatsu suddenly jolts, twisting Osomatsu's hands off him and grabbing them at the wrist to keep them off.
"Just get away from me!" He looks down at Osomatsu's hands, so much like the ones grasped around them -- his own. "Please just stop touching me!" Choromatsu's voice cracks around the "please", wet with emotion. He shoves his brother away like just being in contact with him is painful, sending him a good few feet back.
"You're always trying to be somebody else!" Choromatsu yells at a stunned Osomatsu, despite not being completely sure who he's talking about.
Osomatsu swiftly brushes off the assault, stumbling and eager to patch up the matter.
"I've just now realized I'm not alone..." Osomatsu pleads, arms and appendages reaching out, but not daring a second time. The words sting like they've unleashed a thousand tiny needles upon Choromatsu's heart, but he's a frantic mess and desperate for an escape. He swallows his hesitations and attempts to fuel-up with any and every grievance he's ever had.
"Well, you're just scared of me! Scared of what I can do!" Choromatsu accuses, trying to ignore the steady-ache in his chest.
"And you never cared for me! Never cared about me!" Osomatsu fires back, choking up, making both men recoil in anguish.
"Why can't you just let me free?!?" the younger rages, swimming in liquid-pain.
"'Cause you'd never dare to be!" the elder defends, too tired and too angry for any further attempts at reconciliation.
"'Cause you never listen!"
"You're always insisting!"
"I'm just --"
"Just stop --"
"-- reminiscing!"
"I feel something missing!"
"I just want --"
"-- you here with me!"
"-- my privacy!"
"God!"
"Can't we just get along?"
"Won't you just leave me alone?"
Both men go quiet at the same time, their words lingering in not only the air but in their hearts as well. They stare at each other, silent and defeated. Osomatsu takes an awkward glance at the things he unpacked and Choromatsu thinks about how upset he looked when he did it. The room is a disaster, but the brothers feel even more wrecked on the inside. They meet eyes once more, each begging for the other to take back what has been said, but neither dares.
They face one another, like someone in front a mirror but it's unclear what is the reflection and what is the real thing, equally fragile. The wind continues to howl outside, louder than ever now, as if it was trying to compete with the sound of heartbreak.
Unable to take it any longer, Osomatsu pushes past Choromatsu and storms down the stairs, leaving Choromatsu alone with his decision. As soon as Choromatsu hears the front door slam, he crumbles to the floor, sprawled out on his knees and shaking.
This is what Choromatsu wanted, wasn't it?
So, then, why is he weeping?