Chapter Text
Spencer wraps an arm around Hanna’s shoulders as they watch Aria and Ezra drive away.
“I can’t believe it,” she murmurs, her mouth close enough that Hanna shivers.
“Believe what?” Hanna asks, letting her eyes close briefly as she tips her head against Spencer’s shoulder.
“You’re having a baby,” Spencer replies, like it’s obvious. “Ali and Em are parents, and now you’re going to be one too.”
Hanna nods numbly. The news is still settling in.
“You’re happy, right?” Spencer asks. “Things are okay with you and Caleb?”
Hanna plasters a smile on her face, so tight that it hurts. “Yeah,” she says. “All my dreams are coming true.”
It shouldn’t be a lie, but that doesn’t stop it from feeling like one.
--
Pregnancy is hard. Like, harder than fat camp, hard. Harder than taking a calculus exam after staying up all night worrying about A, hard.
Caleb takes good care of her, but he worries, which makes Hanna worry. And he develops this annoying habit of double-checking all of Hanna’s behavior with the doctor, as if she hasn’t been reading all the same pamphlets he has.
Not long ago she dreamed of being back in New York, of she and Caleb taking the city by storm again, now that they're finally on the same page. But now she can’t imagine being anywhere but Rosewood. Her mom comes over a couple of times a week, bringing Hanna’s favorite dishes from the Radley along with their in-house massage therapist. Alison and Emily are constantly checking up on her, which Hanna found mildly annoying at the beginning of her pregnancy but has come to appreciate by the time she’s stopped being able to see her feet.
“I’m a whale!” she bemoans to Alison on the phone one day. “A sweaty whale that has to pee all the time!”
Ali chuckles warmly. “What do you need?” she asks. “I’m on my way home from work, but I can stop by the store and then your place.”
“What about the girls?”
“Em’s with them. She’ll be fine for a little longer. Where’s Caleb?”
Hanna sighs. “He’s working late. Again.”
She doesn’t really have cause to complain, not when Caleb is working overtime to ensure that the baby will have the best of everything. But still. She’s tired of spending her days alone.
“You should go home to your family,” Hanna tells Alison, hating how pouty she sounds.
“Tell you what. How about I swing by the house, pick up Em and the girls, and we bring you some frozen yogurt? With all your favorite toppings?”
“Caleb says I shouldn’t have that stuff. Too much artificial sweetener,” Hanna says, but she’s already starting to smile.
“I won’t tell if you won’t,” Ali replies. “Chocolate fro-yo with Kit Kats and Oreos?”
“And gummy worms and those really sour hard candies, please!”
Alison makes a retching noise. “That’s disgusting,” she informs Hanna, but a half hour later she and Emily and the girls are clamoring into the loft, Hanna’s perfect treat in hand.
Hanna nearly starts to cry. “You guys are the best!” she exclaims, pulling Ali and Em into a three-way hug.
“What’s family for?” Emily asks.
As they sit around trading gossip, Grace and Lily happily playing with their rattles on the floor, Hanna realizes that she can’t remember the last time the loft felt this much like home.
--
Hanna goes into labor nearly a week past her due date, which means that everyone has been on pins and needles, waiting for the call. Aria and Ezra are in LA, finalizing the contract for the movie version of Then and Now. They send roses—a sweet gesture, to be sure, though the flowers are somewhat overshadowed by the gigantic arrangement and pastry basket Mona has expedited from Paris.
Caleb and Ashley are there the entire time, of course, and Emily and Alison visit just a couple of hours after the baby is born. Stella Ashley Rivers is loud, just like her mother, and Hanna feels her heart crack open the minute she sees her.
Hours later, after she’s wept and slept and the baby has done the same, there’s a knock on her hospital door.
It’s Spencer.
Hanna ushers her inside, grateful to have a moment, just the two of them. Spencer is still in her work clothes, though she looks a bit rumpled from the plane. Hanna shifts Stella into her other arm and pats the spot beside her in the bed.
Spencer snuggles up close, her eyes filling with tears when she sees the baby. “She’s incredible.”
“I know,” Hanna agrees proudly. “Fierce, too. She came out screaming.”
“She’s strong. And beautiful.” Spencer tucks her arm around Hanna’s. “Just like you.”
Hanna’s throat starts to feel tight again, and her face gets hot. She’s cried so much already today, but this feels different. Not really about pain or release or joy, but something else. Something far off and unattainable.
The door swings open and Caleb walks in, carrying his haul from the vending machines. “Spencer!” he says in surprise. “You’re here!”
Spencer pulls herself away from Hanna and sits up. Hanna blinks furiously. She feels like they’ve been caught doing something wrong, but she doesn’t know what.
“I’ll let you two have some food and rest,” Spencer says, her voice sounding a tad regretful. She locks eyes with Hanna, her gaze intense. Like they’re sharing a secret. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“I can’t wait.”
As Spencer leaves the room, Hanna is surprised by just how much she means that.