Chapter Text
"...and so that is why today, Allura and I will not be running today's training session! We will, however, be observing from a distance, so do take this seriously!" Coran chirped in a voice way too cheery for the five grumpy, sleep-deprived paladins right now.
Apparently, at some point in training it was necessary for all Paladins to undergo a mental health screening to ensure that they were in good enough shape to form Voltron, as well as to make sure their intentions were not 'impure'.
(At this, Lance wondered aloud, "But what about Zarkon? Seemed like a pretty evil dude to me..." but Allura's face scrunched up in disgust at the mention of him and she promptly moved on.)
'A Paladin's mental strength and durability are just as important as their physical strength,' Allura emphasised. 'Without both, it can be dangerous in this field of work.'
And so, that led to five pairs of droopy, tired eyes staring at the large screen in front of them. The machine was like a large widescreen TV, and it buzzed with static for a while before turning on fully. A mechanical, voice rang out.
'Systems on. Functioning normally. Paladins, please step forward.'
"Whoa, it sounds like space Siri." Hunk remarked.
Doing as they were told, the strange space TV continued to speak.
'Analysing... Identities acquired. Initial screening and risk analysis complete. Please line up in the following order, and come forward when you are called.'
The screen promptly lit up with their names:
- Katie Holt
- Tsuyoshi Garett
- Keith Kogane
- Takashi Shirogane
- Lance McLain
Allura furrowed her brows. A strange order indeed. Tapping her mic as she stared down at her 5 paladins through the glass window of the observation deck, she cleared her throat,
"Lysma, are you sure about this order? It has not been accidentally scrambled in any manner?"
The five paladins looked back up in curiosity at her as the machine beeped out an 'Affirmative.'
"Allura, what does this order mean?" Shiro questioned.
She chewed on her lip. "It is what Lysma determines to be the levels of severely threatening mental distress present in the current paladins, in ascending order."
The five proceeded to gape at the list, unbelieving.
"I'm the most mentally stable in this group?! What the hell does that mean for everyone else? Jesus Christ..." Pidge muttered, concern evident.
Despite what she said, Pidge and Shiro's positions were frankly the most believable to everyone else - Pidge was the youngest and probably had not reached her emotional peak yet, they reasoned, and Shiro fell later on the list due to his unspoken PTSD.
The short silence following Pidge's outburst was quickly broken by Lance's brusque, though slightly shakily delivered quip,
"Well, well, well, interesting how Mr. Emo Mullet man ended up only third on the list!”
Keith shot him a glare.
"At least I'm not on the bottom - what're you even 'distressed' over? Ran out of face masks this morning?"
Lance dramatically harrumphed and folded his arms.
Lysma's beeping promptly shut everyone up.
'Paladins, please line up NOW.'