Work Text:
The fact is that Tim is used to satisfying his curiosity. And if the Internet couldn't answer his questions, he found a way to find out for himself.
For example! He's been on patrol for Batman and Robin for three months now! They've been fighting a lot lately, but that's okay. Tim's parents are also fighting, he knows that this is normal for adults, and Robin is sooooo old, just like Batman. Batman must be over a hundred! He looks so grown up, older than Daddy Tim!
The old man. And so. What was Tim talking about?
Oh, yeah! The patrols!
As soon as he found out that Gotham has its own superheroes, also so important that they work with Superman and save the world, he hurried to find their photos on the Internet. And there were disgusting photos on the Internet! So Tim bought a very, very good camera with his father's credit card, hacked into police records, estimated the most frequent places where Batman and Robin are seen, and went to take pictures himself.
It was hard to climb the roofs. He could barely reach the fire escapes, and the distance between the bars was just huge. However, he managed, and photographed himself.
However, he didn't know how to take pictures either. But the Internet taught him that well! And he was very good for seven years old–teachers often said that: «You're a very smart boy for your age», and stuff like that. So he's probably pretty good at photography for his age, too.
During these months, he found out more and more places where he could see Batman and Robin. Full-fledged routes of their patrols were gradually being formed. It was so exciting! It seems that neither the police nor the Internet knew about them, so Tim will be the first to find out their routes!
Here. He always satisfied – such a complicated word, he likes to use it, it makes Tim more mature – his curiosity. No, no, that's a childish word. His interest. Dad often says that about possible contracts with all sorts of other adults. Tim was satisfying his interest. And it so happened that, starting to follow Batman, he had even more interests. Tim, as the responsible head of the family he's become this year – «You're already old enough to be a babysitter, aren't you, champ? You will now take care of the house yourself, like a real head of the family» – he made a list of his questions so that he would not forget anything:
• How the Riddler comes up with his riddles. How he makes traps. Where does the money come from;
• How Miss Quinn picks up and waves that huge hammer. Can she teach him to do the same cool backflip with support on his hands? Is it possible for him to make his hair beautifully, beautifully pink too?;
• Can Miss Isley grow a wilted mom flower? Tim forgot to water him, and he turned yellow, and when Tim poured him a whole bottle of water, he didn't feel any better;
• Like a Joker...
Tim hesitated. The Joker seems very, very bad. Tim is confident that he can run away and hide from others – he's been hiding from Batman for three months now! – but the Joker is also very good at hiding from Batman, so he can find Tim. No matter how curious Tim is, how the Joker does what he does, even though he should barely walk (he's older than Batman! So many wrinkles on his forehead! His knees must be very sore! Mrs. Mac, who visits Tim on Saturdays, always complains that she can't climb the stairs because of her sore knees), it's scary to ask the Joker about this.
Tim nods to himself.
• As a Joker
• What does the Batman cave Robin was talking about look like.
And to fulfill this point, Tim adds another one:
• Who are Batman and Robin?
Because once he finds out who they are, he can ask them. It's so polite–he can't ask people he doesn't even know by name about anything. And so. He knows the others by name (is the Joker a name? Tim thinks so), so he can ask them.
Carefully folding the piece of paper in half, and then in half again, Tim puts it in his backpack, puts on a sweatshirt and a camera, and leaves the house. Yesterday, while he was looking for another point on Batman's route, he overheard that the Riddler was planning something north of the bay. If Tim hurries up, he'll be there before Batman, and he'll be able to ask anything that interests him!
***
«Good afternoon, Mr. Nygma!»
Edward was confident enough to admit that he jumped when he heard a child's high-pitched voice behind him. He cursed as he checked his work, but the trap mechanism didn't start a reverse report, so at least he didn't damage his hours of work because of something...
The child. At night. In Gotham. At the docks.
He turned suspiciously and looked at the child. Presumably, the boy – at this age and with a potty hairstyle it is difficult to determine – is 5-7 years old. He was thin, so pale that his skin almost glowed, and his eyes were so bright that Nygma would have considered him blind if it hadn't been for the piercing gaze. He's standing close, with his head up, even though Nygma is squatting right now, making the mystery difficult for Batman with his armor. Now they have more and more conflicts with the Boy Wonder, and it would be foolish for Nygma not to take advantage of this.
A suspicious child in a suspicious, supposedly cursed Gotham. Yes, Nygma watched The Curse. He was glad that this preschooler hadn't opened his mouth yet and started making wheezing, gurgling sounds.
«Can I help you with something, boy?»
He was not mistaken, since the child did not correct him. There's a boy in front of him, so there's a little less chance of curses. It just so happens that no matter how you look at it, little girls are more terrifying than boys.
«My name is Timothy Mac, but you can call me Tim», the child introduced himself with an obvious Bristol accent, definitely imitating one of the adults. Parents, most likely. Nygma knew the top of Gotham, and he didn't remember anyone like "Mac." So, the name is most likely fake. A smart little adult. «I had a few questions, and I would like to ask them. May I, please?»
Well... a polite young man, scary as hell, but maybe not cursed, has already attracted Nygma's attention.
«If you answer a couple of my questions in response, I think we can come to an agreement».
«Of course!»
Nygma turns back to the trap, trying to keep the boy on the periphery. He moves around, squatting next to him, too, and curiously watches his actions.
«How do you come up with traps, Mr. Nygma?»
«The riddler, boy. Show respect to the acknowledged Villain of Gotham».
«It's polite to address people by their last name. And Miss Quinn doesn't have nicknames, even though she's a recognized villain», the boy said it as if he didn't understand the importance of the title of Gotham Robber. It's not a big deal. Bristol children are poorly aware of the danger of the city, growing up with a golden spoon in their mouth. Nygma quickly rebuilds her plans, figuring out how to add a hostage to increase the heat.
«Harley doesn't need a title, she's already the Joker's girlfriend. One connection with him is enough».
«Oh. Thanks for explaining, Mr. Riddler. So how do you come up with traps?»
Nygma looks at the child with an appraising glance, after which she delves into a biased monologue praising his intelligence and ingenuity. It's a little confusing that the boy keeps asking questions, following Nygma from trap to trap, but nothing. He adds fuel to the flame of the Riddler's praise of his mind, even if he has to go into absolutely meaningless details.
«Oh. But why don't you just do very difficult quest rooms to earn money? You would have done well. Isn't robbing the business of those who don't have a way to legally earn the same amount?»
«You don't realize the scale difference, boy. My traps aren't just any quest rooms. It's an art, deadly, dangerous, and beautiful. And now», he pushes the boy into the cage, taking out a special lock from the supplies that was supposed to protect the detonator from the bomb in the city hall. Perhaps it would be more valuable to put it on their little guest. «It's my time to ask questions. How did you find this place?»
«Hmm?» the boy blankly watches as he is locked up, not realizing that his life is about to hang by a thread. «I went to the docks, the ones north of the bay. I heard that you would be there, but you weren't there. But I found a riddle on such a small screen, like this. It was in Latin, which, to be honest, is not cool. English riddles in Latin lose some meaning, and I understand that because of this the riddle had to be simplified, why didn't you take the riddle in English, but more complex? So, I guessed that the answer is a North Star, four and a heart. Then I went to the center of Gotham, walked four blocks from there towards the north star, and found a thing with wires that was beeping. It looks like a bomb, actually! If I had taken such a thing to school, I would probably have been very, very scolded, and you put it on the school's playground! Do you know that there will be a big match there tomorrow? I know because my classmate is being taken home by his older brother, and he was talking sooo loudly about how worried he was before this game. I didn't know what to do about it, but it says on the Internet that you need to call the bomb squad and police, and if I did, I wouldn't have found you. So I found video tutorials, because if it looks like a bomb, then you probably made it disarm like a bomb. But to open the wiring, it was necessary to solve that stupid puzzle...»
Nygma didn't realize that he was frozen, listening to the boy solve his riddles one by one, defusing the traps made for Batman, and he couldn't even get angry from the impression. He had already finished installing the lock, so he just stood there, listening with his mouth open, and didn't say a word when the boy – Tim, he clearly deserves to be addressed by his first name – reached for the lock, starting to pick at its intricate mechanisms.
«...and it was easy to understand from there that you just returned to the warehouse, but on the other hand, I just checked the largest rooms where it would be convenient for you to make a super-cool trap for the finale. You ended up in the third of the warehouses that I checked».
The lock clicked, announcing the solution of the puzzle. Tim came out of the cell, still curiously twirling the mechanism in his hands. He had already raised his huge eyes to Nygma, but the Riddler just waved his hand, already imagining how much work he had to redo.
«Keep it as a keepsake. You...» He sighed, rubbing his temples. «You know what? Here»" he took out a business card, writing down his personal phone number – the one he doesn't change – and handing the card to the boy. «Call me when you're old enough to work».
«Oh» Accepting the card, the boy blinked a couple of times, like a frightening porcelain doll. «Thank you, Mr. Riddler! Goodbye!»
It wasn't until the boy was gone and Edward began to rearrange his plans that the question popped into his head: what was the genius, well-groomed boy doing all alone at night in Gotham? But to be honest... This is Gotham. A good backstory never hurts future additions to the ranks of Gotham Villains.
***
«And that's when I told him: we're breaking up! And he laughed, can you imagine? He didn't believe that I was serious! And this time I was serious! I'm 100% serious!»
«You did a great job, Miss Quinn. He didn't deserve you».
«Exactly!»
«You're very cool without him».
«That's right! And these assholes didn't believe in me at all! But I showed them where the teeth are hiding!»
Harley doesn't think the boy understood her completely, but he didn't look that curious, so she didn't explain that she was literally punching some people in the jaw. They deserved it.
She waved at the boy who had appeared so suddenly on her doorstep that evening, and he obediently bowed his head. Harley carefully fingered the child's hair, washing off excess dye and rating the results of her labors 10 out of 10. It was difficult to bleach only the ends of her hair, which was so short for her taste, but not impossible. She is sure that when they dry, these blue ends will look incredible in combination with the frighteningly omniscient eyes of the boy.
«Bend over like this. Good boy, Timmy! Don't move», she wraps a towel around his head, gives him a good shake, and then lets Timmy straighten up in her dye T–shirt so he doesn't stain his own clothes. Water is still dripping from wet hair, but not too much to worry about. «And here's our handsome guy! Come on, let's dry you, baby, and search the Internet for clothes that match this beauty».
She has no idea how the kid found out her address, why he decided that he could come and ask such stupid questions, but it was awesome what stories she could tell others later. Now it's not just the Riddler who will have a secret pursuer who destroys his traps to ask a few questions. Once is stupid, twice is funny, but three, four is just ridiculous! Nygma increased the complexity of the riddles more and more, just wanting to find out where the limit of the boy's genius was.
Maybe Harley has now got her own little successor, who will be a worthy heir along with this boy Nygma. They will raise such a good new generation of villains. Much better than this stupid generation of young heroes.
«To learn gymnastics, you need a super-duper shape to keep you in the mood, you know? You can't go out on the field in anything. For example, this, and this».
Together, they add bright tops, colorful T-shirts, and rich-colored pants to the basket on the boy's phone. The baby should be brighter than Robin, otherwise what's the point? And she has to teach her baby good taste, because, God knows, Nygma will definitely instill in her boy this disgusting green with question marks. There must be at least one trendsetter in this generation, you know?
She shows him her hammer. He explains that yes, it's heavy, but if you swing it, it will fall like hell! And gristle – bones, flesh, weapons, anything will succumb to this onslaught. She even lets Timmy try it himself. He will definitely need a hammer to fit his size. But that's later. Gymnastics is a good place to start. Fortunately, the kid is literally eager to learn more. He's already good at parkour! And she doesn't seem to skate in the most mediocre way.
Harley is proud of his work. Soon she will introduce her own Miracle Boy to Betsy, and her baby will definitely be better than this grumpy, but, admittedly, artistically flexible Robin.
***
Pamela wanted nothing to do with it.
Since Harley left the Joker, it has become much easier to tolerate her. Pamela could even say that she had made a good friend. But making a friend doesn't mean signing up for that friend's child. And it doesn't matter that her friend didn't sign up for the child either, she accepted him, decided to teach him for some reason, and now she was dragging this crazy little boy without an ounce of survival instinct wherever Batman definitely wasn't. Because, quote, «Excitement (the nickname she gave the boy for working in the field) I'm not ready for this meeting yet». Batman hadn't discovered the boy who was swinging the hammer left and right just because he was busy with the new Robin. Admittedly, the newcomer was ferocious, so Isley didn't blame him for his carelessness.
Not blaming, but definitely secretly condemning. She seems to be the last adult in this crazy town who thinks that children don't belong on the field. At one time, she had to urgently remove the pollen of hugs because she needed a way to get Robin out of particularly fierce battles, and now?
There are two kids in town now, and that's only because the last Robin ran away to Bludhaven. Ordinary people may be deceived that this is another person, but, by God, the Villains of Gotham are not idiots.
She sighed, setting the blue rose on the table and reaching for a pair of scissors to trim a couple of leaves. Her phone wouldn't stop vibrating with messages. After the painted child met Nygma again, it became clear that they had their eyes on the same boy. Isley wasn't going to listen to her complaints again – the news had already reported that there had been a conflict between Hardy Quinn and the Riddler today.
She had finished snapping the leaves when there was a knock on the greenhouse door. Quite politely.
She ignored it. No. No adventures today. She's doing roses.
There was another knock.
The third time, Pamela couldn't stand it, swinging towards the door, and one of the vines opened the door.
A boy in a bright orange tank top, wide purple pants with elastic bands at the bottom, with neon pink hair tips, stood with a pot in his hands.
Well, damn it.
«What do you want?» Rubbing her temples irritably but not attacking, she turned back to the table. The boy – is Timmy, Isl, he's so pretty! – took it as an invitation, because I soon found myself near her.
«Hello, Miss Isley! Can you fix it?» Tim lifted the pot as high as he could, as long as it was closer to Isley's eyes. She just sighed in annoyance, took the pot away and put it on the table, examining it.
A succulent, and completely dead. She broke off one of the petals from the stem, reached for a free pot, filled it with earth and planted this sprout in it, allowing it to take root in the ground in a controlled manner.
«Honestly, how could you kill a poor plant like that?» She grumbled, looking at the main plant. It was long, with an empty stem at the bottom – it was obviously dropping petals under the weight of new, upper ones – the yellow plant was burned, dried and drowned at once. «All you had to do was water it once a week or two. A completely unfussy plant. Half a glass of water should be enough for such a pot».
She handed the new pot to Tim, who had great difficulty holding it in his noodle-thin hands. How did he pull off all the tricks that Harley says he's already learned? How did you carry the hammer? She saw the hammer that Quinn had prepared for the boy: a large, red-and-black one, like the colors of Harley's first costume. He probably weighed only half as much as the boy himself.
«Thank you very much, Miss Isley! Harley invites you to dinner this Friday. Please come by six. She's going to order a pizza».
«Did she tell you where my greenhouse is?»
«No. I knew, but she said it would be rude to come to you without getting a more formal address. I would have brought you a flower a long time ago. I even named him! It says on the Internet that if you talk to flowers, they grow better. His name was Robin I, but now he's probably going to be Robin II. Can you talk to flowers? Can you ask him if he likes the name Robin II?»
In the end, she managed to get the boy out, explaining once again how to keep an eye on his little green friend.
Pamela wasn't going to get involved in this.
But did she say anything at the next battle with Batman? Maybe.
It remains to be hoped that their famous furry will not be as dumb as the Riddler speaks of him after particularly devastating defeats.
***
«I wonder what will happen when your bird meets ours».
Something was happening among the villains. Various rumors started appearing about four months ago, but at a recent battle, Poison Ivy actually confirmed that a child had appeared among the villains. According to eyewitnesses, he is so small that it's ridiculous how he manages to stay in battle. A couple of women who supposedly saw him expressed concern about this, but the men complained more calmly and even strangely dissatisfied that the boy was not doing anything, just running, hitting at random with a hammer, performing gymnastic tricks, like typical children who have learned something and want to show it to everyone.
«Reminds me of the words about young Master Dick, doesn't it?» Pouring him tea, Alfred said thoughtfully. The old butler did not like at all that another child was running around the streets, but this time without proper training and support. «No one took Robin seriously until he made a name for himself as your loyal partner. I'm afraid if the villains have noticed the child, we should act as soon as possible».
«We need to get him out of there» Bruce nodded. He has already prepared a long list of trustworthy foster homes outside of Gotham. There was no doubt that the boy was not Harley Quinn's native, with whom he was mostly seen, but there were questions about the Riddler, with whom the boy was seen almost as often. In any case, it was not a family situation in which a boy could be left if he was allowed to go outside.
The problem was that somehow neither Batman nor Robin had ever met him. We didn't encounter the boy, even when we managed to arrive before Harley escaped. The boy either doesn't get caught on camera, or someone gets rid of all the recordings with him. Even with the recent confirmation from the Ivy, all they have on the newcomer is rumors.
«I took it upon myself to invite Master Dick to join the cause, As a Titan, he has already had to deal with young renegades».
«This... It's a smart move», Bruce stammered and immediately grimaced himself. Their relationship with Dick only escalated when Jason received the mantle of Robin. «Thanks».
«You're welcome, Master Bruce. Try to minimize conflicts. There is a child at stake, and it would be a pity to let him down because of your quarrels».
«You're right, Alfred. I'll do my best».
***
Nightwing is back in town!
Tim doesn't know what case Batman and Robin are working on right now, but it required Robin's return, and Tim immediately appeared with a camera and in ordinary clothes for surveillance. He had very few photos of Nightwing with the new Robin, and he happily pointed the camera at the first Boy Wonder when he seemed to be showing off in front of the new Robin. He ran away, fired a hook, and took off. It was so exciting!
Tim should add an item about flying on a hook to the list.
And then he curled into a ball, pulling his legs very, very close to his chest, and began to turn around. One, two, three, four! Four turns! How cool! Nightwing can do the trick of the great Flying Graysons (Tim knew, he'd been studying everything about gymnastics since Harley started teaching him)! The one that only three people in the world can do! Well, now there are four, or rather two, because the other two are gone, and it's not known if Dick Grayson can still do it, and then there's only one, and...
Ouch.
There were only three people in the world who could do the trick. And there is only one left, not only in the world, but also specifically in Gotham.
Ouch.
Nightwing is Dick Grayson.
Batman is Bruce Wayne.
Robin is the new guy who was talked about in the press. Tim wasn't very interested in him, but his parents would have been disappointed if he hadn't known the news.
(At home, he Googled and found out his name. Robin – Jason Todd).
It seems he has completed another item on the list!
When he returned home that evening, he began to collect evidence. One by one, seemingly completely unrelated events from Wayne's life and Batman's actions began to overlap.
Wayne is a Batsman.
Damn, Uncle Ed would be so proud of him if he knew that Tim had solved Gotham's biggest mystery.
But now we can move on to a more important point!
Without waiting, the next morning Tim dressed up as prettily as possible (Harley made sure he knew what taste was) and jumped on a skateboard on the run, heading to the Waynes.
***
When Dick was invited to the manor to unravel the identity and help the child villain, he did not think that everything would be resolved the next day of his stay in Gotham. Nevertheless, here he is, at damn eleven in the morning, going to open the door.
His appearance is too characteristic and fits the description of a dozen witnesses to confuse him with someone else. Red tips of hair, a red T-shirt with a large black mesh over it, dark green trousers and soul-piercing eyes. The boy was as tall as three apples, as if he was malnourished and shone brighter than the sun when he saw who opened the door for him.
«Hello! My name is Tim Drake, your neighbor. Can I watch the Batman? Please, please, please!»
Well... if Bruce decided that he could adopt every black-haired, blue-eyed boy with a tragic backstory, then Dick would force him to adopt this one as well.
Moreover, what else could they do? The boy will either become a villain who knows their identities, or the new younger brother of Dick and Jason.
Something told him it was worth it.
«Sure, kid. Come on in», he smiles brightly, opening the door wider for the kid to slip inside.
You know what? The three of them will even have more fun driving Bruce to gray hair.