Chapter Text
An endless nothingness. It was dark, and Nico wasn't sure how to describe his surroundings properly.
As a desert, a desert made of pitch black sand and a howling wind slamming right into his face. Or maybe an ocean at night time, with its big waves coming down on him. Or a dark forest, with trees that have no leaves and their branches that would reach for him and sometimes even pull at his shirt.
Whatever it was, it was hell.
Or more precisely Tartarus. Nico wasn't exactly sure what was happening. Which wasn't all that surprising, but he usually had at least some idea of what's going to come for him.
This time he had none.
His feet weren't moving - at least he didn't think they were, he couldn't feel them - but somehow he was getting farther into this deep nothingness. It was getting colder, and Nico hated it.
He hated every second of this.He couldn't end it, though.
He had tried before. Useless.
Suddenly the darkness cleared and he was standing on fresh grass, the sun was shining above him and in front of him were the beautiful cabins of Camp Half-Blood.
The son of Hades allowed a small smile to emerge on his face, a sigh of relieve escaped his lips.
Maybe it won't be a nightmare after all.
He stepped forward, breathing in and out. Again and again. He was home, all would be fine.
When he took the next step, the image of the Camp flickered.
Again, Nico moved closer. Only this time, the image disappeared completely.
Instead of CHB on a calm, sunny day, he saw a battlefield, more so the aftermath of one.
The beautiful green grass was now stained red under Nico's feet. The cabins were no more than mere ruins and he could still smell the smoke from the fire that had burned down the dining pavilion.
(I don't remember what it's called but something like that so roll with it)
He swallowed.
Suddenly the other campers appeared. More or less so anyways. Most of them lay on the ground, wounds all over their bodies, some even had arrows sticking out of their chests.
Nico breathed in sharply.
This is a nightmare.
Suddenly he heard something, a groan. Or was it a growl? He couldn't tell. But it was pain, he was sure of that at least.
The Cabin of Poseidon. It's remains we're in front of him without warning. Nico hadn't moved, he couldn't, he was frozen.
There was movement in the darkness. The son of Hades could make out a figure limping towards him. The only sound that he could hear was the wind howling around him.
When did it start to get windy?
There were sea green eyes that seemed to glow. To illuminate the empty around him.
He could see the camp. But he didn't feel it.
Not really.
Percy looked at him, glared. Nico didn't know why.
"She's dead," was all he said. His voice was a void, cold and dark like everything around them. "They all are."
Nico blinked, he knew already, he had seen it. "I know," he replied.
Percy - it's not Percy, it couldn't be, this is a nightmare - closed in on him, he held his right arm. It had to be broken. He was limping, moving.
And Nico was frozen.
Their eyes locked, and Percy's were bloodshed. He was missing an ear, like it was ripped of.
The blood dripped onto the grass. The green grass, green no more.
Nico looked down. "You should let Will take a look at that," nothing more than a whisper. It should have been inaudible. Should have been.
Percy laughed.
He glared. They both did, only one of them shed tears. They fell over a pale face.
"You should have been here. You weren't, and now she is dead. They both are. They all are.
"I'm sorry,"
"No you are not,"
"I am not?,"
The wind wasn't there anymore, there was only darkness, only nothing. An endless nothing.
"You should have been here,"
Percy glared, Nico looked at the ground. They were dead, and he wasn't here. Had he run away again. He must have.
A numb sound came from in front of him. Can sounds be numb? It felt like it.
His cousin was on his knees, clutching his middle.
Sea green eyes. Percy's eyes have always been sea green.
Why did they feel black?
This is a nightmare.
They were black. Nico was sure, the were green - sea green - but they felt black. Not dark or cold or empty. Black. They were a void, they were black.
Nico hated it. Hated the black eyes, even though they were sea green.
The eyes stared at him, and Percy's Form began to fade. Everything faded. There was almost nothing.
Sea green eyes. "They regret it,"
"Who?,"
He already knows what. They would all regret it sooner or later. They would all regret him.
He didn't get an answer.
He knew. The eyes were gone, and there was only black. No eyes.
The wind picked up again.
A soft voice was talking to him, and a hand was running through his hair. Smoothing it.
A finger was caressing his cheek, wiping something away.
Nico's throat burned. It felt raw and that made his stomach turn.
His eyes opened and he came face to face with his father. Brows furrowed and hand still placed on his cheek. He was sitting next to Nico on the bed.
The silence made the demigod sick.
"Are you alright?," Hades' voice was soft and gently. A tone Nico had rarely heard. It made his heart ache slightly.
"Y-yes, Father," dam it! He didn't mean for his voice to crack.
Besides, did he just lie to a God? His own father nonetheless? If Nico hadn't been in the Underworld already, he would've guessed that it would be his next stop.
Hades swiped away a tear on his son's face.
"You are lying to me, my son. I do not want that, I cannot help you if you hide the truth from me," the God had a tender look in his eyes. "Please, Nico, what is wrong?"
Nico sat up straight. "Why are you here?," it sounded more like a demand than a question, and Nico instinctively flinched back.
"Sorry...," he mumbled half-heartedly.
Nico didn't look at his father, but he could swear there was a smirk on his face.
"It's alright. I...apparently stood in front of your room for longer than I thought. I heard you screaming,"
Nico felt his face hear up. "Did anyone else -,"
Hades shook his head. "No. You weren't...loud enough to be heard by anyone but myself. I could only hear you because I was nearby,"
His father moved closer to him and placed a palm on his forehead as if to check for a fever.
"You aren't sick," the deity murmered, Hades looked at his son again. This time his gaze seemed calculating. "Or are you?,"
Nico crossed his arms. "Not - not that I'm aware, no,"
He wouldn't be able to hold it togsther for much longer. The tears were gathering behind his eyes and an immense feeling of dread seemed to overtake him.
He felt trapped.
The demigod closed his eyes and breathed in. The breath he took was shaky, which apparently was the last straw for Hades.
The God of the Dead moved onto the bed and took his son into an embrace. Slowly letting his fingers run through the boy's hair. It took a few moments before Nico leaned into him. But it took only a few mere seconds for his chest to start getting wet.
Nico had never been one to full on sob. Most of the time he would just let his tears run freely and choke on his own breath at one point or another.
Hades rubbed his child's back as he began to shake.
"What is going on, mio figlio? What has you so shaken?," he asked into Nico's hair.
He hadn't spoken Italian since Maria had died, but he thought his son might calm down at the sound of the familiar words.
Hades felt the demigod taking deep breaths, obviously trying to make it all stop.
Nico shifted slightly so that he could rest his ear against his father's chest. He could hear the rhythm of a heart beating. (do gods have hearts? Now they do)
He let his breathing match it.
Carefully he glanced up at Hades. "It's nothing. Just a - a silly dream...it happens,"
"A silly dream that makes you scream after bare minutes of falling asleep and cry into my chest?," the words were soft, it was just a simple question.
Nico barely contained a flinch.
"I went through Tartarus...remember?,"
Hades frowned, he would never be able to forget that. He had almost lost his son, which was also when he first realized how ring his actions truly were.
"Of course I remember, you foolish child. You could have died. You could have been trapped there for all eternity," he pressed a kiss onto his son's hair. "No parent would ever be able to forget such a thing,"
Nico looked at th ceiling. It was dark, but it wasn't nothing. It wasn't empty.
"I saw things...down there," he bit his lip. Was this the right thing to do, after all?
Fingers moved through his hair again. "Go on,"
The demigod swallowed. "Nothing was real. And I m-mean nothing,"
"I saw Bianca. I saw Mamma...I thought I did, obviously not,"
"I saw Camp Half-Blood sometimes. In ruins,"
"I saw my friends die, heard them blame me,"
He closed his eyes and sighed. "Father?,"
"Yes, child?,"
"Do you ever regret me?,"
His father had black eyes. They weren't from his dreams though. Those eyes were nothing.
Cold and empty. Always in the back of his mind.
The eyes he saw now were wet and full of emotion. They were warm and welcoming.
They didn't seem to be sea green, they were black. They weren't dark and cold. They were black, and Nico loved it. His father's eyes were black.
Nico felt Hades' breathing come to a stop for a moment, saw his face twist into a facade he had never seen before. It was disturbing.
But Nico felt safe. Safe and sound. He hoped he really was.
His father was breathing.
"I will never regret you. I wouldn't dare ever doing so, my child. I am proud of you, so unimaginably proud...dont ever think otherwise," Hades felt his heart crack. "Your nightmares do not make such a decision, I am the only one who can tell you this, so I'm telling you, I am so proud, to have you as my son,"
Nico snuggled impossibly closer to his father. "Thanks," his eyelids were dropping.
Hades smiled down at his sleepy child.
"Nico?,"
"Hm?,"
"...I love you,"
The boy's eyes closed, there was black. But it wasn't nothing. He felt the wind die down.
"Love you too, Dad,"