Chapter Text
After that incident, Tanuma did wonder, what if Natsume was stuck in a situation like that? Unable to get help, and Tanuma could only sit and watch as he struggled helplessly. The few times he thought of it, he shrugged it off, passing it off as paranoia.
But it was still a very real fear. Every encounter with a yokai that Natsume had nearly gave him a heart attack, unaware of the enemy and the extent of his attack. Some weren’t physical, haunting him through curses or possession. And knowing Natsume, he wasn’t even sure that he would even know due to Natsume’s stupid insistence to keep him from worrying.
But Tanuma couldn’t help but worry.
Staring up at the moon, he wondered to himself. Why had he been able to see shadows, reflections and hear sounds of yokai, but never see them? What kind of half-baked ability was this? Still, it was better than nothing, and yet it was utterly useless in terms of protecting Natsume.
By the time he had seen the reflection or shadow, even the sound, it was close to impossible for him to know the exact position of the yokai.
He was a liability. Natsume had once, or was it multiple times, asked him to go home to prevent him from being involved. The chances of Natsume acting impulsively when he was there was higher.
He was useless. Weak and defenseless, who couldn’t protect someone he desperately wanted to protect.
“Tanuma? What’s up?”
What the…why did he hear Natsume’s voice, hallucinations, cursed or what was it now?
“Tanuma? Why’d you call?” Natsume’s voice echoed from his phone, sounding more concerned by the passing minute of his silence.
Shit, he had accidentally dialled Natsume. Stupid, stupid Kaname. How could he explain himself?
“Oh, nothing, must have dialled you on accident.”
“You sure? Call me if anything happens, alright?”
“Mhm.”
“Okay… see you then.”
“Yeah, see you.” Hanging up the call, Tanuma sighed. What was he doing now, worrying Natsume unnecessarily.
“…” The line clicked, and Natsume instantly knew something was off. Wrong, somewhat, and it ached him in a sour, unsettling way.
And as any normal worried teenager would do, Natsume was off to visit Tanuma.
“Takashi? It’s so late, where are you going?”
“Sorry, Touko-san. I’m probably staying a night at Tanuma’s house, so don’t keep up waiting for me.”
“Oh..alright. Are you not bringing Ponta?”
“He’s dead to the world.” Natsume laughs, knowing that the cat drunkard would be useless at this hour.
“Stay safe!”
“I will.”
Dashing to Tanuma’s house, Natsume worries. He sounded off on the phone, but was it really appropriate to come and visit him so late at night?
But no matter, Tanuma was most important after all.
And boy, was he right.
There, Tanuma sat by his windowsill, looking like some forlorn, damsel in distress.
“Tanuma!” Natsume called.
“Natsume!” Tanuma’s eyes opened with surprise, “What are you doing here?”
“I’m coming up.” Natsume smiled up at him.
“What?” Tanuma flustered, about to go and prepare some tea.
Once they were sat inside Tanuma’s room, Natsume sighed.
“Come here.” , opening his arms to Tanuma with a kind look.
Tanuma nodded obediently, curling into Natsume’s embrace.
“Why’d you come?”
“Hmm, that’s a good question. Just felt like it, I guess.” Natsume laughed softly, gently carding his hands through Tanuma’s hair.
“That’s not a good reason. It’s so late, after all…” Tanuma grumbled to himself.
“It perfectly is, especially when my darling here is on the verge of tears.” Turning Tanuma to face him, he held his face in one hand, intertwining the other with Tanuma’s hand.
A sniff. Small but still audible.
Tugging Tanuma towards himself, Natsume thought he’d be more awkward, but it just seemed to come to him naturally, holding Tanuma in his arms as he cries.
A sob. Natsume holds Tanuma tighter.
“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Natsume hums, brushing away Tanuma’s bangs to see him better.
“Pathetic…”
“What is?”
“Me…”
“Huh-what are you on Tanuma -“
“No, I’m supposed to be strong for you. But here I am, crying in your arms just ‘cause I felt worried…” Tanuma muttered under his breath.
“…And who said that? That you’re pathetic?” Natsume huffed, holding him tighter.
“When we got into a relationship, heck even when we were friends, I never felt a need for someone to be strong. Although I have my fears, I had an inkling that you worried for my safety at times. And yes, in return, I tried to hide it more. But that doesn’t make you pathetic. Isn’t it human nature to worry?”
“But now that I do know your worries, I’ll make sure to tell you each time something happens. There shouldn’t be an incident that you’re unaware of, and if I’m unconscious, Nyanko-sensei would let you know. Aren’t we equals in this relationship? The way you’re always there to help me, I’m always here to reassure you too. So, thank you, Tanuma.” Natsume smiles fondly, pressing a kiss to Tanuma’s forehead.
Tanuma tilts up his head to reciprocate the kiss. He feels Natsume smile into the kiss as hands run through his hair.
“I love you.” Tanuma utters.
“I love you too.” Natsume laughs, soft and sweet.